


the devil's in the details / but you got a friend in me

by killerleo



Category: Glee
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, McKinley AU, S3 AU, Slow Burn, blaine/kurt at the beginning, sebastian POV
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:40:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 70,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26885254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerleo/pseuds/killerleo
Summary: As Sebastian reluctantly walked towards the entrance of McKinley - hand very tightly on his bag - he kept running his argument of why he should’ve gone to Dalton through his head, as whilst he thought he had explained it consciously and cleverly to his parents, for some reason they had disagreed. It made no sense - he had gone to a private school in Paris, and one in the States beforehand, so now making him go to a public school was just fucking cruel.Apparently, they thought the last two years of his high school life should be spent somewhere he’d gain ‘humility’, and ‘real world perspective’, which was essentially code for ‘you’re a spoilt asshole’. Which, considering the fact they’d been the ones spoiling him, he really didn’t think he should get punished for.~or, if sebastian was sent to mckinley instead of dalton for his junior year
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Sebastian Smythe
Comments: 110
Kudos: 117





	1. coming of age has come and gone

**Author's Note:**

> wow OK so.... i actually wrote the first chunk of this back in august, promptly forgot it existed, and then stumbled back across it. it's only partly done so i debated whether or not to start posting it, but honestly i'd written enough it was a waste not to and hopefully this'll give me some motivation to finish it!! shoutout to quinn for beta reading the first bit of this back in AUGUST, but yeah ily queen so please enjoy xoxo (and hey ella and zach im still doing our other side project dw)
> 
> also this is a slow burn, you have been warned. this is your serious, official warning. 
> 
> plus sebastian pov, so like, he is a bit of an ass at times, but you know this, so yeah <3
> 
> im going to update this as much as i can - i am a university student in my last year though so it may not be as regular as i have done in the past cos you know, my degree, but still. 
> 
> this chapter covers episodes 3x01, and 3x02
> 
> thank you for reading, i hope you enjoy it!! if u want to leave a comment or smth it makes me day but thank u for reading <3
> 
> title from 'peace' taylor swift (my fave song from folklore <3 swiftie)

Sebastian was convinced he could smell the school before he even stepped foot in it.

McKinley was overbearing, unhygienic, and stuffed to the brim with loudmouthed and ignorant teenagers who seemed to have no affinity for class or cleanliness; he didn’t need to go inside to know that. There were actual slushie stains on the walls outside, a kid being tossed in a dumpster, and several gangs of kids smoking in clusters around the building, decorating it with ash and graffiti. 

He was seriously regretting driving to school; his car was significantly nicer than any other vehicle in the parking lot, and he was fairly sure that by the end of the day he was going to be missing a few tires, or a windscreen. Not to mention his sanity.

As Sebastian reluctantly walked towards the entrance of McKinley - hand very tightly on his bag - he kept running his argument of why he should’ve gone to Dalton through his head, as whilst he thought he had explained it consciously and cleverly to his parents, for some reason they had disagreed. It made no sense - he had gone to a private school in Paris, and one in the States beforehand, so now making him go to a public school was just fucking  _ cruel _ . 

Apparently, they thought the last two years of his high school life should be spent somewhere he’d gain ‘humility’, and ‘real world perspective’, which was essentially code for ‘you’re a spoilt asshole’. Which, considering the fact they’d been the ones spoiling him, he really didn’t think he should get punished for.

And punishment this really was, as Sebastian found himself shoved through the door by a neanderthal in a red letterman jacket who frankly looked a decade too old to be in high school, the body odour literally pouring off him in waves. The inside of the school was decidedly worse than the outside, especially now he was forced to be in closer proximity to the students, the jock who had barged past him now joining his other intellectually challenged friends by the lockers. 

Sebastian inwardly sighed and tightened his grip on his bag, heading off down the corridor to try and find the guidance counsellor's office, as for some reason that was where he had been instructed to go once he had gotten to the school. Honestly, he was surprised a place like this even  _ had _ a guidance counsellor; it sort of just seemed like the kind of establishment to let it’s students drift around unhappy and directionless, as long as the majority of them managed to graduate.

In the month he’d been back from Paris, he’d been living in complete denial about the start of term, sort of hoping that it had all been a joke and his parents were going to drop him off at Dalton, blazer in hand. And yes, Sebastian would admit that part of the reason he didn’t want to be at McKinley was because it was a public school, but it was mainly because he knew he would thrive somewhere like Dalton - he was ambitious, driven, hardworking, and he liked to be academically challenged as best as he could, and he just knew he wouldn’t be given the same opportunities here. 

Maybe this guidance counsellor could try and give him evidence against that, but from the gormless, vacant looks on the faces of the students in the halls, he could kind of already see that this place wasn’t going to push him as much as he needed to be. Add the fact that Sebastian refused to be in the closet and sometimes couldn’t help his flirtatious nature, this whole McKinley thing was lining up to be a complete disaster, and he couldn’t wait for the two years to be over as soon as possible. 

~

Miss Pillsbury, the guidance counsellor, was...interesting. She seemed sweet, if not a little intense, and had provided him with a small army of pamphlets as soon as he had stepped in the door, and then another load after he had let slip he was gay. From what he could gather, Mckinley had a fairly homophobic past, which wasn’t fairly shocking, but he also knew that he was pretty straight-passing, so it could be worse. 

Plus, he had said he was interested in sports and she had readily nodded at that, encouraging him to try out for several teams which would make it easier to make friends, as well as establish himself a place in the pecking order - that had gone unsaid, but it was heavily implied. 

It seemed that this school’s understanding of gay kids probably went as far as Teen Vogue and ugly sweaters, so his appearence would probably deflect untoward attention by not fitting the singular sterotyping they associated with his sexuality. 

After a rather bizarre conversation about the Spanish teacher, she had tentatively asked if he had any interest in the performing arts, to which Sebastian had given slight nod and shrug, informing her he had over a decade worth of dance experience, and had been a part of a nationally acclaimed show choir in Paris, singing one of the lead vocal parts. At that, she had almost fallen off her chair, hurriedly telling him about McKinley’s glee club, rushing to say they’d gone all the way to nationals the year before, and were looking for new members. 

Sebastian was not as willing accept that idea as he had with the athletics; he was good at reading people, and it was obvious from her expression that their show choir was not exactly popular, especially if the guidance counsellor was asking any random new student to join, they couldn’t exactly be brimming with prospects. 

And if he was going to survive this place, being at the bottom of the food chain surrounded by a bunch of pretentious, depressed theatre students was not the way to do it. 

The talk of the New Directions - and honestly, what a fucking  _ awful _ name - marked the end of their conversation, as it clearly made Miss Pillsbury forget anything else she wanted to say, so Sebastian had dismissed himself, hastily leaving her office before she tried to cram any more pamphlets into his bag. 

After that strangely bizarre welcome to the school, he then had to actually deal with lessons, which were just as mind-numbingly dull as he had imagined they would be. The only slightly entertaining thing that happened was during lunch, when, as he was walking past the cafeteria (there was no way he was actually going  _ inside _ ), he caught the end of a random musical performance, which led to a full on food fight. The singers had been decent, he’d give them that, but the pure hatred the rest of the school had for them was laughable, and only cemented his lack of desire to join the glee club, no matter how good they could be. 

No way was he getting spaghetti in his hair. Or what they were trying to pass as spaghetti anyway.

Time crawled by, and whilst it was boring and unchallenging, he managed to go the entire day without being assaulted or harassed and his car was still intact at the end of the day, so he counted that as a mild win. 

At home, his parents asked how school had been, if he had made any friends, joined any clubs. It was unbelievably false and curated, their smiles as fake as wax figures and as uncaring as statues, so he had simply gone to his room and slammed the door - if he was going to be treated like a child, he was going to act like one. 

As he lay in bed that evening, he tried to imagine the next day would be better, that he would be able to go through the whole time without wanting to slam his head on a desk. He didn’t have high hopes.

~

The first thing Sebastian did on arrival the following day was sign up for tryouts in swimming, soccer, and basketball. 

Although he had gathered that football was the most popular sport in the school, he was still fairly skinny, and being beaten up on the field by complete tanks just really didn’t appeal to him all that much, so he resigned himself to the sports he knew he would excel in. Sebastian didn’t do anything halfway, and he liked to win, so if he was going to be on a team, it was going to be one where he could be the best, and he wouldn’t accept anything less. 

Someone from his math class had said he could sit with him at lunch, and whilst Sebastian really,  _ really _ didn’t want to, it seemed better than sitting alone, so had begrudgingly agreed and followed him outside to the courtyard, where for some reason there was a bright purple piano by the steps. His math friend - he had not been listening when he’d said his name - just shrugged and said that was something that happened at McKinley sometimes, which was frankly not reassuring, and somewhat unsettling. 

They sat at one of the slightly sticky metal tables, Sebastian mostly keeping to himself; he was grateful for some company, but he was also fully aware that as soon as he was on the sports teams they were going to be his friends here, so he wasn’t too invested in the conversation. He was engrossed in thought, thinking about if he was going to have to wear one of those tacky letterman jackets and feeling ill at the idea, when all of a sudden a fanfare of brass erupted out of nowhere, flooding the courtyard. 

The lack of surprise from anyone was akin to just how weird McKinley itself was, and Sebastian was mainly confused as to why any one of those glee kids would choose to perform in public again after the complete shit show of the day before, although when he turned his head to look, any dismissive thoughts completely dissolved. 

The guy who had now burst into Tom Jones was definitely not one of the kids who had been assaulted in the cafeteria the day before, although Sebastian could easily think of a few ways he’d like to dirty him up. And the rest of the school seemed to be enjoying it too, the response even a few bars in completely different to the past performance, his energy infectious and his talent immeasurable. 

And holy fucking  _ shit _ was he attractive. 

Sebastian had been with a lot of guys, kissed a lot of guys and fucked a lot of guys. But the sight of this bow tie wearing, red chino clad school boy was enough to make his knees weak and other parts of him  _ very _ hard, as he spun around and jumped from step to step as if he was a fucking bird. Honestly, it should not have been attractive as it was, but this was the hottest guy he’d seen at this school so far, who was also insanely talented and somehow didn’t have the entire student population hating him, as the entire courtyard was at least tapping their feet and smiling. 

The way he was dancing with the cheerleaders made him doubt his initial thought that this guy was gay, but then as he hopped down one of the steps and their eyes met, Sebastian very much came to the conclusion that bowtie boy was very gay indeed. He flashed him a wink, holding their eye contact as long as the other boy’s performance would allow, and feeling very pleased with himself when it caused a light blush on his cheeks and one missed step, causing the singer to look away immediately. 

Oh yeah, definitely gay. 

It was all going so well, and Sebastian was sure it was one of the best outdoor performances he’d ever seen, up until the point the piano was somehow set on fire. 

Because of course it was.

After that the whole courtyard pretty much cleared out, and he found himself whisked away inside the school with the crowd, not before seeing the crestfallen look on the bowtie boy’s face, and the way he was pulled into a hug by someone who was dressed so hideously it should be a crime, which annoyed him more than he thought it should. 

After lunch had passed, along with a pitiful English lesson and a poor excuse of a History class, Sebastian set off into the hallway, determined to try and find the singer from earlier. Even though he had been wearing an honest to god bow tie whilst in high school, he was still undeniably hot with an ass that was unfair, and if Sebastian was guilty of one thing, it was knowing who he wanted and how he was going to get them. 

He pushed through the crowds of sweaty teenagers, almost giving up his search when out of the corner of his eye he spotted a flash of red, a lower half filling out chinos so wonderfully he knew he had found who he was looking for. Running a hand through his hair quickly, to make sure it was nice and pretentiously dishevelled the way he liked it, Sebastian straightened out his top and made his way over to the locker which was currently having books piled in it, far more academic than any other student he had seen.

“That performance out there was really something,” he announced, leaning against the metal next to the boy, who jumped a little at the sound of his voice, head whipping around to stare up at him. Sebastian noticed the way his eyes drifted up to his face catching on his lips, and he felt himself smirk a little. “Honestly, I thought this school had no redeeming qualities at all until I saw you sing.”

The boy blushed a little but mostly looked proud, smiling at the compliment in a way that showed he was probably used to them, but still absurdly humble anyway. “Oh, thank you! It was good until there was arson, but that was sort of out of my control.”

That made Sebastian laugh a little, pleased with the other boy’s willingness to speak to him, and the ease of conversation. “I’m Sebastian. Sebastian Smythe. I’m new at McKinley, if you haven’t seen me around before.” 

“Are you a freshman?” the boy blurted out, a confused look on his face, followed by one of immediate regret as if he hadn’t even realised he’d said those words. It was adorable frankly, and Sebastian didn’t  _ do _ adorable.

“Do I look like a freshman?” he replied, raising his eyebrows and adjusting his shoulders slightly, letting the material of his top stretch across his arms. 

“Uh, no, no, sorry,” the other boy stuttered, shaking his head a little to recover himself. “I’m Blaine Anderson, and I’m actually new here, as well. I just transferred as a junior.”

Blaine. Sebastian thought that was a good name, one suitable for moaning.

“I’m a junior, as well,” he replied, noticing the relief on Blaine’s face, probably just happy he hadn’t been checking out a fourteen year old. “I just moved from Paris, so I don’t really know anyone here. Would you want to show me around sometime?” The slightly suggestive tone to Sebastian’s voice was unmistakable, but Blaine in front of him did seem to be a little oblivious, just closing the metal door of his locker with a smile. 

“Paris? Wow, that’s, uh, wow,” he exclaimed, whilst blinking a few times, eyelashes sinfully long against his cheek. “And, sure! I know what it’s like to be the new kid somewhere, especially when you don’t know anyone. I’m lucky to have my boyfriend here.”

Boyfriend. Great. 

Sebastian gave a slight nod, both happy that his ego had been stroked with Blaine’s clear amazement at his past, and annoyed at this complication. The ‘boyfriend’ in question was probably the one wearing that god awful half blazer/vest combination from the courtyard, which was still burned into his eyeballs. At least Blaine was gay. 

“I think he’s the one that’s lucky to have you, killer,” Sebastian said, letting his eyes drop down slightly to Blaine’s throat, which was sinfully covered up by a bow tie and polo as he swallowed heavily. 

Before Blaine could say something else, probably some half hearted attempt to steer the conversation, an arm was wrapped through his, cutting into Sebastian’s line of vision as this newcomer pressed himself into Blaine’s side. 

Ah, the boyfriend. 

“Kurt! We were just talking about you!” Blaine announced, whipping his head to his boyfriend and clearing his throat. ‘Kurt’ squeezed his arm and looked at Sebastian with utter disdain, clearly not happy with this conversation. “This is, uh, Sebastian.”

He flashed a quick smile, not reaching his eyes but not intending for it to, eyes remaining cold. Kurt pursed his lips and gave him a dirty look, which Sebastian really couldn’t blame him for; it would be weirder if he was happy to stumble upon this interaction.

“And how do we know Sebastian?” he asked, clutching onto Blaine with such intensity it was as if he was worried he was going to fly away. This guy seriously needed to calm down; his jealousy was exhausting if not slightly entertaining, and his pitiful attempt to mark his territory was frankly laughable.

Blaine remained fairly oblivious, just smiling and looking between the two of them. “He was just complimenting my performance; he’s a transfer junior like me, so I don’t think you’ll have seen him before.” Kurt nodded at that, and Sebastian could admit he looked at his boyfriend fairly lovingly, even if he did have a weird urge to punch him.

“Are you interested in the performing arts then, Sebastian? I presume that’s why you found Blaine, to tell him that,” Kurt replied, eyes sharp and he knew they were on the same wavelength, and that they were both aware of what the other was doing. 

Sebastian was rubbed the wrong way by this guy, which was probably why the next sentence that came out of his mouth was as horrific as it was. “Yes, actually, after his number outside, I was thinking of joining the glee club.”

Sometimes his dedication to getting laid surprised even him. It clearly also surprised the couple in front of him, Blaine looking pleasantly shocked whilst his worst half looked a few moments away from throwing up. 

The thought of being in the New Directions made Sebastian feel similarly, but he would be lying if he said that he didn’t already miss performing, as after just a month he felt that longing to be up on the stage. And there was something about Blaine Anderson that meant he didn’t want to stay away, not after witnessing him in action. 

“Do you have show choir experience? We’re desperate for people, so it doesn’t even really matter, but you should definitely audition!” Blaine exclaimed, looking up at him gleefully. Kurt hummed next to him, his expression a little less enthusiastic.

“I wouldn’t say ‘desperate’ for people,” he said, not hiding the slight scrunch of his nose. Sebastian decided that this conversation was fairly pointless, and he had lost interest in it the second the pride float reject had shown up anyway, so simply adjusted his bag on his shoulder and straightened his back. 

“I guess you’ll have to find out in auditions, won’t you,” he smirked, giving Blaine another wink before turning to walk away, knowing both of their eyes were on him. This would be fun.

~

The realisation that he was now going to actual commit social suicide and join the glee club started to set in through the afternoon, and he started to brainstorm audition songs and different routines he could do, getting increasingly frustrated as none of them seemed good enough. It was ridiculous, really, he would probably get in if he did a single spin and sang a nursery rhyme, but for some reason he wanted to impress, and, well, show off. 

Joining the New Directions was probably an awful idea; he loved performing, and he was excellent at it, but it would do absolutely nothing to help his social life at all, especially once it got out that he was gay. But fuck, Blaine Anderson’s face kept propping up in his mind and he couldn’t get it out, and if being in show choir was the way to get him, then that’s what he would do; even if his boyfriend made Sebastian feel physically sick. Okay, so he was a little dramatic, whatever. 

He proceeded to spend the rest of the day thinking up audition pieces, and when he got home he immediately went onto Facebook, searching up Blaine Anderson, and clicking to message him. Not creepy, just flattering. 

**Sebastian Smythe**

hey killer, we met at school today? just wanted to ask about auditioning for the glee club and how i could go about it

The reply came amusingly quickly, Blaine accepting his friend request and starting to type almost immediately. 

**Blaine Anderson**

hi sebastian! and im so happy you want to join! i have my first rehearsal tomorrow so why don’t you drop by then? it’s at 3pm in the choir room

**Sebastian Smythe**

sounds great, do you think for my audition i should set a piano on fire or would that be a little derivative 

**Blaine Anderson**

wow, original idea much? maybe you should blow up the drum kit

**Sebastian Smythe**

i’ll keep that in mind, don’t think i wont do it ;)

**Blaine Anderson**

you know somehow i believe you

**Sebastian Smythe**

so i’ll see you tomorrow? i’ll try not to show you up too much with my audition, but can’t make any promises killer

**Blaine Anderson**

i’m sure you’ll do your best - you’ll get in no matter what so don’t hurt yourself, although i am looking forward to seeing it!

**Blaine Anderson**

goodnight sebastian :)

It was a pretty clear signifier for the end of a conversation, but Sebastian wasn’t fussed; Blaine had been happy to talk with him and engaged in some playful chat, as well as admitted he was looking forward to seeing his audition. Overall, he counted it as a pretty successful interaction, and he couldn’t help the seeds of happiness that grew in him a little as he read through the messages, which was a fairly new emotion for him. 

**Sebastian Smythe**

goodnight killer ;)

He couldn’t resist the winky face. It would simply be out of character for him not to add it, and he could always pass it off as a French thing if he had to. All Sebastian knew was that for some reason, he was looking forward to going into the choir room the next day, and it had very little to do with the music. 

~

Sebastian had not been waiting out by the choir room for 5 minutes, waiting for the best time to knock on the door to come in. That would be weird and sad, and he was not weird and sad. It’s just, Blaine had turned up for his first rehearsal and was being introduced to the rest of the club, and Sebastian didn’t want to barge in on his moment like that, so it seemed appropriate. 

His morning had gone surprisingly well, as his soccer tryouts had gone excellently, as well as being told he was essentially guaranteed a place on the swim team if he just showed up. Unfortunately, he hadn’t been able to catch Blaine in the day, but he had received a message from him a few hours earlier wishing him luck and reminding him to stop by, which was something so absurdly thoughtful and well meaning it should’ve disgusted him, but for some reason didn’t.

Honestly, Sebastian figured that, whilst his intentions with Blaine were less than honorable, the other boy was looking for a friend; someone who wasn’t his boyfriend’s friend first. 

Moving schools to be with your partner was moronic, of course, in every way, but being somewhere where all your friends were first friends with your boyfriend must feel rather like having in-laws, always feeling slightly left out. And then came Sebastian: someone new, like him, someone with similar interests, and someone wanting to talk to  _ him _ , and, well, it made sense that Blaine would want to pursue that friendship.

Even though he mainly just wanted to tear him away from his boyfriend and do him in the back of his car, Sebastian couldn’t help but think it would be nice to have a friend as well, especially if it did come with the added bonus of infuriating Hummel. 

From just one conversation he could tell that was something that was going to be very important to him. 

The conversation in the choir room seemed to take a turn, but before Sebastian could make his entrance, a girl in a cheerleading uniform stormed out the door, a furious expression on her face. Her shoulder bumped into his and they both turned, his mouth ready to fire off some insult, although he couldn’t quite decide what direction to take it. 

“Watch it, twink John Mulanely,” she snapped, beating him to it, before giving him a once over that frankly he was proud of, and then storming away. Clearly the rumours about there being more drama in the New Directions than the plot of Gossip Girl was true, although he was sad she was leaving, as she had the kind of energy he liked. 

After she had walked off, Sebastian shook his shoulders out a little and then opened the choir room door, not bothering to knock as apparently dramatic entrances and exits were suitable for this club.

A sea of faces turned to look at him, the room looking like a college prospectus’ desperation for diversity, most of them appearing very unpleased with a newcomer, with the exception of Blaine, who’s face lit up when he saw him. 

“Hi, can we help you?” the man by the piano asked, a somewhat friendly look on his face but mainly confusion, and Sebastian gathered not many people came in here by choice. 

He tried not to look too repulsed by the vest and tie combination he was wearing, and instead took a few more steps into the room, one hand slung in his pocket. “This is the glee club, right? I was thinking of auditioning, Blaine said to drop by.”

The rest of the room all then swivelled their heads to look at Blaine, who in turn had blushed a little at the mention of his name, whilst his boyfriend appeared to have been struck with a serious case of gout, judging from his face. 

“Anderson has been here five minutes, and he’s already calling the shots? Dude, I knew this was going to happen,” a guy with a mohawk groaned, rolling his eyes very over dramatically. And that comment was frankly offensive - they needed more people, yet they got annoyed when someone actually made the effort to get someone? 

“Well, seeing as when you performed without him you all ended up taking a shower in garbage and he managed to actually impress a crowd, maybe you should be paying a little more attention to him,” Sebastian announced with a deadpan voice, raising his eyebrows at the guy who looked as if he should be paying rent in juvie. 

And yes, he left out the small detail of the piano being set on fire, but honestly, that wasn’t Blaine’s fault. Although arson was a very gay crime. 

The glee club looked a little disgruntled by his comment, whilst the teacher furrowed his brow a little and looked like he wanted to say something - even though he knew that he was objectively right.

Sebastian sighed and straightened up his back, deciding that having them all hate him probably wasn’t the best start, even if he genuinely didn’t care about a single one of them. “I know you need 12 people to compete in sectionals, and I’m not seeing 12 here, so it’s in your best interests to let me in. Don’t worry, I’ll audition, but don’t give Blaine shit for recruiting people when the rest of you really should be as well.”

A tall, jock looking guy sat at the front awkwardly shuffled in his seat at that, clearly deeming himself the leader and feeling a little guilty he hadn’t been pulling his weight, the girl next to him crossing her arms and swishing her hair dramatically, and Sebastian could already tell she was going to be annoying.

“You’re familiar with show choir rules? Have you competed before…?” the teacher asked, pausing for him to fill in his name. 

“Sebastian, Sebastian Smythe. And, yeah, I competed nationally as a lead singer when I lived in Paris, and I have been competitively dancing since I was 6 years old,” he announced, not even attempting to hide the hint of arrogance in his voice. His ego grew a significant amount when he saw Blaine’s eyebrows shoot up at that, mouth dropping open, whilst Hummel next to him appeared to suffer a mild stroke. 

The rest of the New Directions looked a mixture of impressed and annoyed by that, and Sebastian wondered what all of their problems were; apparently they needed members but hated anyone with the prospect of talent out of jealousy and annoyance. Not even  _ he _ was that bitter.

“Well, then! I’d almost say you don’t need to audition, but we’d all love to see what you’ve got; you want to do something right now?”

The vest-clad director of the club clapped his hands together and smiled at the room, clearly ecstatic, whilst the students didn’t seem to match his enthusiasm. One of them grumbled something about having to share even more solos now, which Sebastian gleefully ignored in favour of nodding and setting his bag down on the floor. It wasn’t his fault he was talented, and if he got the spotlight, well then frankly, he deserved it.

He went and confirmed with the band his song choice, before he let himself be directed to the middle of the room and took a breath, collecting himself and then throwing a wink at Blaine for good measure, grinning at the look on his face. He could get used to that look.

The music kicked in and he began his performance, the feeling of singing and dancing alone in front of a pretty judgemental audience a strange one, but he was confident enough in his abilities that he felt no shame. He’d chosen a song where he could show off both musically and physically - it was perhaps a little over the top, but he wanted to make an impression. 

Maybe the lyrics “do you think I’m sexy” were a little on the nose, but he never said he was subtle.

After the first verse, the disgruntlement of the glee club started to wear off, some of them joining in with backing vocals, and a blonde cheerleader and an Asian guy even getting up to dance with him, the two of them surprisingly very talented. By the time he was at the end of the first chorus, everyone except Hummel and the annoying brunette girl were on their feet, and he figured that all of them interrupting a performance was fairly commonplace by their willingness to get up. 

He wasn’t going to complain if it meant dancing with Blaine, however, the shorter boy doing a spin next to him and laughing as he moved, shouting out backing vocals as he went. Even Sebastian found himself having fun, revelling in being able to perform again, and happy about showing off, doing a few more dance tricks than necessary, but if he was going to be in the club, there was no way he was going to be pushed to the back.

The cheering and applause that burst when he finished was exactly what he wanted, and he took a bow and smirked, not even out of breath, which was more than he could say for the rest of them. Most of the people in the room were fairly exhausting to look at, but Blaine’s grinning face made it worth it, as well as Hummel’s sour one next to him. He found himself briefly wondering if the angry cheerleader would’ve enjoyed it when he felt a hand clap on his shoulder, and a butt chin appear to his right.

“Well then, I think it’s safe to say we’ve found our newest member of the New Directions!”

~

It only took one rehearsal for Sebastian to start regretting his decision to join the glee club.

The majority of them were irritating, whiny, and utterly complacent in their mediocrity, liking to complain about everything and then put no effort into actually getting things done. The only comfort was seeing Blaine itch with the same irritation, which made a lot more sense when he found out about his background at Dalton. 

They’d steadily spoken over the last week, in rehearsals and in shared classes, catching quick talks in corridors and over text as well. Sebastian had never put in so much effort for a fuck, and tried not to think about how he was becoming a friend.

Blaine had readily taken a pretty low profile role within the group, which was absolutely abhorrent seeing as he was probably the most talented person in there, but he seemed happy to sway in the background and resign himself even though that seemed so out of sorts for him. Sebastian wanted to just yell at Schuester to pull himself together and actually give the group direction and regime, not this aimless wishy washy business he seemed to be doing, and he knew Blaine would agree with him. 

On top of that, they announced that they were doing a school musical, which - of course they were. 

‘West Side Story’ seemed like a questionable choice given the ethnicity of the people in the room, but he figured a detail like that probably wasn’t deemed significant in McKinley, so he didn’t bring it up. It did, however, mean that everyone seemed to just forget about sectionals and instead just wanted to talk non stop about the musical, the glee rehearsals just left behind.

Luckily, before he absolutely lost his shit in the third rehearsal of the week where everything had been completely pointless and there was still apparently tension with that cheerleader that everyone didn’t want to talk about, Schuester called their attention before it was over to make an announcement. 

“Ok everyone, now I know this year our determination to get back to nationals and take that trophy is bigger than ever, so I want to do every single measure I can to push us there, even if that means a lot of hard work. So, I am implementing a bootycamp, for those in here that struggle more with choreography, so we can get the essentials and foundations of dancing locked down,” Mr Schuester announced, clasping his hands together and staring pointedly around the room at the array of unhappy faces.

Sebastian nearly cried with happiness, as half of their members danced as if they had a peg leg and lacked feeling in half of their bodies, and looking at them was simply exhausting. He wouldn’t have been surprised if they were just asked to leave the competition ten seconds into their set if they saw Hudson try and step ball change. 

“Now, this isn’t compulsory for everyone, but anyone is welcome to come. However, for Finn, Mercedes, Puck, and Kurt, it is going to be essential for you guys, so this isn’t optional.”

At the mention of Hummel’s name Sebastian could literally feel the serotonin pumping through his veins, the disgruntled pelican look on his face the highlight of his week. He didn’t even bother covering up his snort of laughter, basking in the glares sent his way; maybe they should just be less shit at dancing and he would be less mean. 

Mike got up from his seat and moved over to be next to Schuester, and the teacher gave him a grateful smile. “I’ve asked Mike here to help out, and I know we haven’t had the chance to talk about it yet, but I was hoping that Sebastian would help him co-direct it? When we spoke about your dance experience in my office last week you’re easily the most qualified here, and it’ll help get you acquainted with everyone, as well,” Schuester asked, looking at him hopefully. 

Sebastian wasn’t exactly surprised: the Spanish teacher had basically been drooling when he listed off his training and awards after being cornered into a ‘friendly chat’ in his office. Getting acquainted with the glee club really wasn’t high on his priorities, seeing as the only reason he even joined in the first place was for Blaine, but then again, bossing around the rest of them as they failed to two step in time to a four four beat  _ did _ sound pretty fun. 

“Sure, happy to help out,” he drawled, grinning at Hummel and baring his teeth, but giving Mike a friendly nod, as getting to work with him did sound fairly fun, considering he was one of the only tolerable people in the club. 

Next to him, Blaine stuck his hand in the air, biting his lip in thought. “Would it be okay if I came along as well? It’ll be useful to get on the same page as you guys, know how you all work” he asked earnestly, which was adorable seeing as he was one of the best dancers there. Blaine glanced over at Sebastian and offered him a smile, brief but warm, and fuck if that didn’t just remind him why he was doing all of this in the first place. 

Mr Schuester just nodded and said anyone could come along if they wanted, and that it would start the following day. For the rest of the rehearsal, they broke off into smaller groups and ran through ideas, and Sebastian spent the session planning the dance training - he was  _ never _ going to call it bootycamp, not even with a gun to his head - with Mike, the other guy turning out to be super chill and friendly, which was a relief. And despite his calm exterior, he agreed that they needed to push them and not be complacent, so a fairly rigorous schedule was set out. 

When they were dismissed, Sebastian heard his name be called before he could make it out of the door, turning around to see Blaine waving at him to wait. 

“Sebastian, hey, just wanted to say it’s super cool of you to help out with the dance stuff,” he said, jogging lightly to catch up and then falling into step with him as they made it out the choir room. Blaine wasn’t  _ ridiculously _ short, but the way his head aligned with his own neck, so that if they lay together he would fit into the crook above his shoulder, was unbelievably attractive. It wasn’t like Sebastian usually went for shorter guys, but Blaine was just compact and built in a way that was just tempting beyond compare, and he had a weird urge to  _ hold _ him. 

Shaking that thought out of his head, he instead looked over to smirk down at the other boy. “It’s no big deal. It means I get to boss people around, so it’s sort of a win win. And don’t think for a second I’m complaining, because I definitely am not, but you do realise that there’s no need at all for you to do it, right?” 

Blaine shrugged a little, adjusting the strap of his bag as they walked. “I’m an ok dancer, I guess, but the Warblers were completely different. And I don’t want to stay stuck in their style, and then stick out over here, you know?” he said, stopping by his locker and leaning on it a little. His eyes flickered and he bit the inside of his cheek, Sebastian easily noticing how his mind was working a mile a minute.

“Maybe as well, I guess: most people here still do think of me as a Warbler, and like I don’t really belong. So I was thinking, maybe this’ll help, you know? Make me fit better into the team, rather than be seen as an outsider.”

And there it was. 

Sebastian may have only known Blaine for a week, but it was obvious he was confident in his abilities and knew he didn’t need extra dance training, so his reasoning of wanting to stop feeling so ostracized made sense. Rehearsals made it clear that to most of the New Directions, Blaine was Kurt’s boyfriend, and the Warbler, and he wasn’t necessarily treated like one of them, held at arm's length and eyed wearily. 

He could admit it wasn’t Hummel’s  _ fault _ , but the truth was that he was there first, and then Blaine came along and he was therefore just an extension of Kurt, and not seen as his own person. And as much as Sebastian wanted to say it was his raw sexual magnetism that made Blaine speak to him, he knew it was mainly because he was the only person there who treated him as  _ him, _ and not just a significant other. 

Sebastian turned and stared down at Blaine, leaning against the metal door of the locker with one shoulder and crossing his arms, studying the other boy’s face as his honey eyes looked a little tired and resigned, lips slightly red from being nibbled on. 

“You know it’s not your fault if they’re too jealous to appreciate you straight away, right?”

Blaine scrunched his nose a bit and shook his head, turning to open his locker. “They’re not  _ jealous,  _ Sebastian. It’s just maybe a bit hard for them, seeing as we were competing against one another last year.”

He raised an eyebrow at the shorter boy, both of them knowing his statement was heavily false. “It’s ok to admit it: you’re probably the most talented person in there. You know, in terms of being well rounded as a performer, and also not being insufferable.” That earned him a swat on the arm, but it was worth it to see a smile. “Come to choreography training if you want to - I’ll certainly be happy to see you - but don’t think for a second you have anything to prove, ok?”

Blaine nodded lightly, his eyes still focused on stacking books in his locker but some of the weight on his shoulders seeming to have lifted a bit. “Thanks, Sebastian. I’m really glad you joined glee club, you know that, right? I get you’re on a lot of the sports teams now, and if you weren’t in the New Directions you’d probably be one of the ‘popular’ kids, but I’m happy you're here.” 

Sebastian couldn’t help the way he preened a little at that, getting some weird happiness from Blaine thinking he was popular, as if this was an 80’s high school flick. It was true: at least he was on the sports teams, as, unsurprisingly, he had made it onto every team he had tried out for, and had the letterman jacket hidden in his wardrobe to prove it. He had a strange urge to want to wear the tacky thing around Blaine, just to see if he would like it. 

“Maybe, but I’m sure the whole ‘gay’ thing wouldn’t do me many favours,” Sebastian shrugged, not denying his natural affinity for popularity, but he wasn’t naive enough to think that the neanderthals of the school would allow him to be at top of the food chain as a raging homosexual. 

Blaine nodded slightly, looking as if he was pondering something. “Yeah, but you’re so unashamed and proud about it. You don’t let anyone define you. You’re similar to Kurt in that way.” Sebastian’s expression of disgust must have been pretty evident the way Blaine rolled his eyes at him. “Stop it, it was a compliment.”

It most certainly was not.

“And anyway, I’m pretty sure most people are scared of you, so I think you’ll be alright,” Blaine added, closing the door to his locker and nudging him a little with his shoulder. That was better. 

They set off down the corridor again, heading in similar directions for their next class, Sebastian letting their arms brush together slightly. “So, West Side Story then? Do you even need to audition for Tony, or are they just going to give it to you?”

For some reason Blaine laughed at that, when it really hadn't been much of a joke. McKinley seemed to have absolutely no rules or sense of normality anyway. 

“I’m not auditioning for Tony, actually.”

Sebastian ground to a halt in the middle of the corridor, staring down at Blaine as if he hadn’t just said something so absurdly ridiculous. “And why the fuck not? Who else are they going to cast? Unless Berry is trying to make them give her both lead roles, of course,” he added, which again wasn’t much of a joke considering who he was talking about. 

In front of him, Blaine turned around and gave him a slightly tired look; the one he did when Sebastian started insulting glee club and McKinley a little too often. It was a look that had frequented his face often over the past week, as the two of them had a few classes together, and had actually started to talk a lot more often, including when Sebastian had sat with him and the glee kids at lunch a few times. He could only take so much of them however, so it wasn’t every day; he was afraid they would start to rub off on him, otherwise.

“Well, Kurt really wants the role, and he’s a senior - I have next year to try out for a lead. And are you not going for it?” Blaine asked him as he tilted his head and crossed his arms, and thankfully the hallways were emptying as they were now standing completely still in the middle of one. 

“First of all, no thank you - I’ve already been roped into doing most of the bloody choreography because Chang wants a main role, so I couldn't even if I wanted to. I’ll just grab a small role like Baby John or something. And secondly, you do realise that, just because Kurt wants it, doesn’t mean you can’t both audition? Isn’t that a bit...insulting?” Sebastian said slowly, trying to figure it out in his head. 

Blaine scrunched up his nose and shook his head, looking like he was going to argue.

“I’m just saying, killer,” Sebastian continued, “It’s good if Hummel wants it - I mean, he is sort of talented, in a gay way, so he should audition. But so are you, and you would just roll over and give it to him, without doing something that you want? Surely just the best person for the part should get it.”

Now Blaine really looked like he was going to argue, even when Sebastian had just  _ complimented  _ Hummel, which made him want to scratch off his own skin.

“I’m not  _ rolling over _ like a dog, I’m just trying to be nice. Kurt is very talented, not just in a ‘gay way’ - whatever that means - and he deserves the role. It’ll be my turn next year,” Blaine stated in annoyance, though he wasn’t really tall enough to be intimidating. 

Sebastian raised his hands up in mock defeat, not wanting to piss off Blaine too much, as although he was hot when he was riled up, it would be significantly harder to get into his pants if he hated him. “Just - why can’t you get what you want? You did literally transfer schools for him, remember.” He adjusted the strap on his shoulder and stared down at Blaine, an array of expressions accumulating on his face which ranged from defensive to upset. 

“And think about why you won’t even audition for Tony, because we all know if you did, you’d get it over Hummel any day.” Before Blaine could try and offer up some bullshit retort, Sebastian gave him a final pointed look and then turned on his heel and headed to class. 

~

He and Blaine didn’t have another one on one conversation again for a few days. They were in glee together, and Blaine attended dance training as he said he would, but he also was decidedly not looking to talk. Fortunately for him, Sebastian found himself a little busy helping the hopeless to try and corner him, being tied up with trying to get Finn to understand the concept of rhythm and Puck to stop thrusting on anything he sees. 

They worked in the choir room when the auditions started happening, which again shut down any chance of glee rehearsals having any attention put on them - Sebastian didn’t think he’d even heard someone say the word ‘setlist’ since he started. Mike had started focusing on his own audition a little more so he found himself with more control in the dance sessions, and if he got a little meaner, then well, maybe they should just get better. 

He didn’t even need to ask when Hummel was auditioning, as he was apparently treating it like he was going for Broadway with the amount of effort he was putting into it, complete with the props and get up which Sebastian saw him trailing in and out of the auditorium. On the day of the audition, he’d been walking by and managed to catch a glimpse - he could begrudgingly admit he had a little talent even if he did sing in a register too high for him, however anyone could see he wasn’t really ‘Tony’ material. 

And he must’ve realised it too as his campaign to be Senior Class president started the very next day, clearly realising he needed to start actually doing something to put on his college applications. 

Blaine had lasted 4 days not speaking to him until he finally slumped down in the seat next to Sebastian in their French class, sighing as he did it. 

“I’m not sure what to audition with. ‘Something’s Coming’ is by far my favourite song from the musical but it’s also a Tony solo so that seems a little out there.”

Sebastian blinked twice, collected his thoughts, and bit his tongue before instantly going on an anti-Hummel rant, as last time he dared say something negative towards his boyfriend Blaine had shut him out. It wasn’t that he had missed him or anything. 

“Well I just think go with what is going to show you off best vocally,” he offered after a short pause. “You know what I think about your choices as far as the actual role is -”

“Sebastian.” Blaine cut him off, waving a hand and rolling his eyes. He turned to look at him with a slightly resigned look, eyes that damn honey colour that just seemed impossible, with a hint of pleading in them that was utterly irresistible.

“Fine, fine,” he muttered and shuffled in his seat a bit so they were facing one another. “Whatever you want to go for, don’t think about it too much, just pick the song where you can both show off vocally as well as perform a little, remember they’re looking for actors as well, so make sure you can show that off.”

That seemed to satisfy Blaine, who chewed on his lower lip a little bit and nodded, seeming to be processing his words. “That makes sense, I just want to do my best really, still feel like I need to prove myself sometimes,” he said with a forced chuckle, eyes cast down onto the work in front of him. “I think ‘Something’s Coming’ will work, it’s nicely in my range and I can go with it on stage, give a bit of a performance.”

“I’ve barely known you for two weeks and I know you’re going to smash it Anderson, so just go for it,” Sebastian stated, the fact true and honest. From his first ever performance to the bits and pieces he had done in glee, he knew that he would be happy to watch Blaine Anderson sing anything anywhere, and not just because he looked hot doing so. 

“Thank you, Sebastian, honestly,” the shorter boy said, giving him that trademark bashful smile that he only seemed to offer him, and Sebastian would be lying if it didn’t make a warmth growth in his stomach. 

“Don’t worry about it killer, you’ll do great. Do you know about anyone else auditioning?” he asked, mainly to try and size up any smaller parts he could get without actually trying out for, seeing as he had sort of been shoved with the role of choreographer despite being at McKinley for a fortnight. 

Blaine hummed and tapped a pen against his chin in a  _ very _ distracting manner. “Obviously Rachel is going for Maria, and I think Mercedes as well? I’m pretty sure Santana is auditioning for Anita, which would be amazing since she’s not in glee at the moment.”

He and Santana had briefly crossed paths, she called him ‘twink John Mulaney’ in passing that one time and she had been around in the past few weeks if he’d been sitting with anyone from the show choir, but it was clear that being banned from glee had taken a toll on her and the relationships within the club. 

Sebastian knew she had a similar attitude to him, in regards to the bite and the comments, and he was definitely intrigued by the cheerleader, so it would be interesting to work with her in the show at least. 

Before he could pry any further, the teacher motioned for the class to be silent to run through some verbs, and it really was his god awful luck that the only class with a non-incompetant teacher was of a language he was practically fluent in already. The next hour wasn’t as horrific as some of his other lessons, doing all his work within 10 minutes and then doing Blaine’s as well just because he could. 

They had a familiar chatter which was nice, clearly his previous Hummel comments forgiven, and when they parted ways at the end of class Sebastian found himself watching him go.

He didn’t want to dwell on  _ those _ feelings, so just turned to head to the locker rooms, soccer practice starting soon. 

~

Sebastian was glad that although everything else at McKinley was terrifyingly subpar, they did have a fairly decent athletic department. Being out on the pitch with other fairly competent people was a pleasure he didn’t take for granted, and by the end of the session he was feeling relaxed and happy, pleased to have burnt off some of his stress and frustrations, both mental and physical. 

There were still barely any ‘out’ guys at the school, and he had been too busy adjusting to McKinley in the last 2 weeks to go to Scandals like he had done in the summer, so his sexual frustration was at an all time high. For the rest of the soccer boys that didn’t seem to be a problem the way they were currently chatting up the cheerleaders, despite every single one of those girls being more attractive. 

Sebastian was about to leave the pitch and head to the locker rooms, as being surrounded by the flirting heterosexuals was not his idea of fun, when a cheerio uniform suddenly blocked his path. 

“New glee gay, what’s your deal with Blaine?” Santana asked, bite in her tone and steely look in her eye, arms crossed over her body and definitely not going to let him walk past.

“There’s no deal, Lopez, he’s pretty much one of the only tolerable people in that room, and he got me to join, so,” he said with a shrug, matching her tone and look. She gave a slow nod, eyeing him up and down, but not in the way girls usually did, with hungry looks and bitten lips, but a bit more judgemental and assessing. 

“Hm, he doesn’t have much competition with that. Apart from Britt they do all kind of suck,” she replied, although she wasn’t as good at covering up her feelings like he was. 

“You miss them though.”

It wasn’t a question but a statement, and even though she immediately rolled her eyes and scoffed at him, there was no way she could actually deny it. 

“They grow on you, like a tumour. But mainly it’s the performance I miss, making them look bad by being better than them.” Sebastian grinned at her, as that was probably exactly what he would say if the roles were reversed. Even though the New Directions hadn’t grown on him just yet, they’d probably infect and poison him at some point with their weird clinginess. 

“Come back then, you know Blaine’s not mad at you for anything with the piano, and Schuester is desperate for members so he needs you, especially as you seem to have a small amount of talent. Get Anderson to speak on your behalf, say some bullshit apology, it doesn’t matter if you don’t mean it, and then just join again,” Sebastian stated, slightly bored tone. 

It didn’t make too much of a difference to him, but truthfully they needed members and she was good, plus it would get everyone to stop whining all the damn time. The added bonuses that Blaine would be happy and Hummel annoyed helped a little as well. 

Santana pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow, as if trying to assess if he was being genuine or not. “I’ll think about it. Mainly just so I can spend more time with Britt, but we’ll see. You do also realise that I can practically smell you lusting over Blaine, right?”

He shrugged, not denying anything. It didn’t matter to him if people knew he was into Blaine - the guy was unbelievably hot it would be weird if he  _ wasn’t _ into him. “So what? He has a nice ass and more talent in his pinky toe than the majority of people in the choir room, plus he has a sexless boyfriend who’s so insecure he doesn’t even want them to audition for the same part. Maybe I just want to show him a good time.”

“Look, I don’t care, I honestly don’t. The fact you’re dripping over the hobbit has very little bearing on my life, and it’s funny to see Hummel get mad anyway. Just don’t fuck up everything too much because you want to get your dick wet - if I join glee club again I’d rather someone else with a bitchy attitude was there than not, so don’t get yourself kicked out too,” she said frankly, giving a little shrug of the shoulder. 

Sebastian appreciated her tone and persona, feeling like if they were on different sides all hell would break loose, so making a mental note to always play for the same team. “I need to head inside, but I’ll keep it in mind. I hope to see you in the next rehearsal J-Lo” he said with a smirk, and then walked past her to follow his teammates to the locker room, determined to get out of his sweaty kit as soon as possible.

~

He could already tell she was going to be in the choir room the next time he saw her, and he couldn’t help the small part of him that knew Blaine was going to be proud. And whilst the auditions were all closed, Sebastian didn’t need to see Blaine’s to know that it had gone well, outstanding even. 

The fact that about 10 minutes after it ended he was approached by the boy himself, giddy with excitement and practically bouncing off the walls, had only solidified that knowledge further, as Sebastian found himself nearly tugged down into a hug before Blaine seemingly thought better of it, and just clasped his shoulder instead. 

“They asked me to read for Tony! I said I was only interested in Bernardo, or Officer Krupke or something, but after I sang they gave me some Tony lines to do and said they thought I killed it!” Blaine babbled, the words tumbling out of his mouth excitedly.

Sebastian didn’t even bother to fake surprise at that, as if they  _ hadn’t _ asked Blaine to read for the role he probably would’ve had them all fired for neglect. “Congrats killer, you must’ve really done something with that song then huh?”

“I just think it’s a great number really, and it happens to be in my ideal range, but yeah it went well I have to say, and I think the reading did too!” Blaine’s eyes were lit up, so full of elation and adrenaline Sebastian couldn’t help the smile that broke on his own face, grinning down at the boy in front of him bouncing on his toes. 

Blaine continued, telling him in detail about his performance, breaking down the choreography that was primarily improvised but that he thought was quite effective, and what they all said after he was done. Sebastian didn’t usually listen when people talked, finding most of them dull and repetitive, but he found himself hanging onto every word that was falling out of his mouth, his erratic hand movements and the way his tongue darted out to lick his lips after every sentence.

Him  _ recounting _ his performance was more enticing than anything he had seen anyone else do in the glee club yet. 

After a quick pause, Sebastian noticed Blaine’s eyes falter a bit, and some of his enthusiasm dropped from his frame. “I need to tell Kurt,” he sighed, starting to rub his forearm. “I told him I wasn’t going for Tony, I don’t want him to think I lied.”

“If he’s upset even for a second then he needs to get over himself,” Sebastian scoffed immediately, ignoring Blaine’s frown. “Jealousy isn’t a good look on him, he should just be happy for you, no questions asked.”

To him, that was that. It was simple really, and he’d never had a relationship that had lasted longer than an hour, but he understood that one of the important bits was supporting your partner no matter what. At least that was what he’d been told. 

“I know, but this really does mean a lot to him you know, I just don’t want him to be upset, it’s not quite as black and white as you make everything out to be,” Blaine sighed. “I need to go, but I’ll see you in glee club next week?”

Sebastian nodded briefly, wanting to argue further but aware it probably wouldn’t do anything but make it worse. He watched Blaine walk away, wishing he could shout at him at fucking talented he was and how he shouldn’t shrink himself, but Sebastian didn’t do that, didn’t do things selflessly. Instead he just watched his ass as he left. 


	2. your integrity makes me seem small

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is the last fully written chap i have - the next one is 3/4 done so should be up in the next few days!! the next one is a longggg one as well, like super long, so dont worry!! 
> 
> this overs episodes 3x03, 3x04, 3x05
> 
> hope u enjoy!!

Over the weekend Sebastian had gone to Scandals for the first time since starting McKinley, feeling that familiar itch building up until on Saturday night he’d taken a cab to the bar and didn’t leave til the early hours of the morning. 

He only bought his first two drinks and had the rest got for him, dancing with different strangers until one with dark hair and light eyes had led him to the backseat of his car, the familiar routine breathing a sense of calm into Sebastian. 

Hot skin, ragged breaths, indecent sounds, it was all second nature to him, feeling someone’s scalp under his nails and tasting the salt off their neck, and it reminded him who he really was, the person everybody knew him to be. 

Stumbling back into his house at three am on a Sunday, knowing his parents fell asleep hours ago not caring where he was, he collapsed onto his bed in clothes stained and ruined, the inescapable loneliness of the mattress welcoming him. He couldn’t help but stop the intrusive thoughts of gelled hair and honey eyes seeping into his mind, wondering what he would’ve felt like arching beneath him, moaning his name into his ear. It was all he seemed to think about these days. 

~

School rolled around the next week after the recovery of Sunday nursing a hangover and stiff limbs, the building now covered in posters for different senior class presidents, all of which were a complete eyesore. No matter how strange Brittney’s platform was, Sebastian knew she would be getting his vote over Hummel any day - well literally anyone would get his vote over Hummel, but still. 

When he walked into the first glee rehearsal of the week, hickies still fresh under his collar and brain a little numb from the complete lack of intellectual stimulation in his lessons, it was no surprise to him that Santana was sat at the back of the choir room, legs crossed and looking nonchalant.

Sebastian simply smirked and then sat in the seat next to her, dropping his bag onto the floor. Before either one of them could try and say something mildly insulting, Mr Schue clapped his hands at the front of the room to get their attention. 

“All right guys, good to see you all after the weekend. Bootcamp is still going on so those of you who need to make sure you keep coming, see either Mike, Sebastian, or myself if you need anything, and remember it’s the last of the West Side auditions this week,” he announced, and from the slight bristles between Blaine and Hummel, the musical had been a hot topic between the two of them. Sebastian resisted the urge to throw something. 

“I’d also like to welcome back Santana, who we are very happy to have rejoin us here,” Mr Schuester continued, gesturing over at the cheerleader who gave a very fake attempt at a smile, before kicking Sebastian’s shin when he snickered slightly. 

Their teacher continued with the rehearsal, which was frankly a waste of everyone’s time, although he kept noticing Blaine giving him an odd look throughout. Sebastian mainly just spoke with Santana, the two of them swapping commentary back and forth whilst Schuester rambled on about whatever, most of the people in the room too distracted by West Side to even think about some weird musical lesson this week.

Mike had asked to chat with him after it was finished, so Sebastian hung back to wait for the other boy to be done talking to Tina when someone prodded his arm. 

He turned to see Blaine staring up at him, brow arched. “I know you had something to do with Santana coming back,” he said frankly, looking a little pleased with himself. “She asked me to help apologise to Mr Schue on her behalf so she could return, and she not so subtly alluded to the ‘meerkat looking asshole’ who she spoke to.”

“And you hear the words ‘meerkat looking asshole’ and you immediately think of me? Ouch, Anderson,” Sebastian teased, clasping at his heart and chuckling at Blaine’s rolled eyes. “You know me, why would I do something like that? I’m only in this club cos I like performing and I get to stare at your ass sometimes.”

That earned him a swat on the arm, Blaine looking over his shoulder to make sure no one heard, for some reason. “You need to stop saying stuff like that Sebastian, I know they’re just jokes but Kurt doesn’t like them.” 

He frowned a little at that, because they were most definitely  _ not _ jokes and everyone was very much aware of that fact. 

“And I don’t know why you would do it, but it’s nice you did. Everyone’s happy to have her back, so thanks,” Blaine finished, smiling a little again as if the previous comment was ignored, before patting him on the arm and leaving the choir room. Even if Sebastian knew he only spoke to Lopez because of some weird hope it would make Blaine happy, knowing he succeeded in that still made him smile a little, as he tried to push down those irritating feelings. 

Tina had left alongside Blaine, so Sebastian went to go over to Mike, presuming he just wanted to talk about some choreography or something, not minding waiting around to speak to the other boy who was fairly tolerable. 

“What did you wanna talk about? Hopefully it’s you coming round to the idea of just replacing Hudson’s legs as that is genuinely going to be the only thing that makes him better.”

Mike laughed at that, shaking his head at Sebastian as he approached, probably used to his outlandish insults by now, even if he didn’t always condone them. “No, it’s not that - I have my audition tomorrow afternoon, so I won’t be able to do the bootycamp today, I just need a little extra rehearsal on my dancing, and I need to do more studying as well, I’m in danger of falling behind.”

Sebastian nodded, one of the things the two of them had bonded over in the last few weeks of running dance training - he still  _ refused _ to say bootycamp and he knew Chang only said it to annoy him - was the expectations of their parents, and the high standards set upon them. He was lucky, they allowed him to have dance lessons and participate in performing a lot more than Mike’s had, but the expectation of going into law and maintaining perfect grades was still there. 

“Don’t worry about it, take whatever time you need. You know if you’re not there I can get away with being meaner so it all works out” he teased, which was the friendliest he could get. Kindness and empathy weren’t necessarily in his vocabulary, but not even he could find it in himself to be an asshole to someone like Mike, especially when he was currently looking like several veins were going to burst in his head.

“Just...do you think I should do it? The musical I mean,” Mike sighed, running a hand through his hair raggedly, the question sounding like it was one he had been holding in all day. 

Again, advice wasn’t really something in Sebastian’s vocabulary, not anything with good intentions anyway. But he understood Mike’s struggle, the complications of a strict father and passive mother who have their expectations set and will accept nothing less, even at the consequence of losing your passions. 

“Chang, we both know you  _ should  _ do it. And trust me, I get it, parents suck, and they kind of fuck things up when it comes to this stuff, but dancing is your passion, and I know you can sing better than you let on, and how much you want this role. If it was anyone else in this club I’d probably just tell them to give up on their dreams and grab a Lima Bean apron, but you deserve this.” It was probably one of the nicest things he’d ever said, surprising both of them with his words. 

Mike then offered him a genuine smile, some of the tension lines on his forehead easing up. “Anyone else apart from Blaine that is,” he teased with a wink.

“I  _ literally _ was just nice to you, don't make me take it back,” Sebastian warned, but with no real bite in his voice. The way he stared at Blaine was obvious to absolutely everyone apart from the boy himself it seemed. Mike just laughed at him and slapped him on the back, turning to start heading out the choir room. 

“Kidding Smythe, but seriously, thank you. I can’t tell you how happy I am I have you helping out with all this dance stuff, you’re saving my life over here,” he exclaimed, giving him a soft smile as they walked out the door, preparing to go different ways. “And honestly? You’re not as much of an asshole as you like to think you are.”

He walked off to the left, leaving Sebastian standing in the doorway of the choir room, completely unsure how to take those words.

~

Taking control of the dance training - again, he was  _ never _ calling it bootycamp - was therapeutic for him, working out being called somewhat ‘nice’ by Mike when that was something that was clearly not true. And by working it out he meant being able to insult the complete lack of dance ability from these teenagers.

After the pep rally Brittney had done earlier, her performance of Run the World making Sebastian completely understand why Santana was so obsessed with her, Hummel was visibly unhappy and nervous, probably as he now realised there was little hope of him winning the campaign. Mercedes was also being a little difficult, not picking up on any of the choreography and clearly not having practiced, but honestly, her voice was so good and her talent so big he could look past that a little.

Instead he took his energies out on Hummel, which was helped by the fact that Blaine wasn’t there so he didn’t have to deal with any weird guilt from insulting his boyfriend. It wasn’t  _ his _ fault that Kurt couldn’t seem to do what he asked, and got so offended when he called him a Golden Girls rejected stunt double.

Sebastian was almost admirational of how Hummel managed to last until the end of the session before he actually snapped back, as he was honestly starting to feel a little rejected.

“God what is your problem today! I mean you have been genuinely insufferable since the moment you stepped in this school but you’ve been particularly infuriating today,” Kurt vented, whipping around to face him as the others started to leave. 

“Maybe I just have a low tolerance for people that can’t dance and dress like they’re trying to make people suffer blindness. You make me want to be homophobic, Hummel,” Sebastian replied in a deadpan voice, raising his eyebrows and staring down in a very condescending way. 

Kurt set down his gym back and crossed his arms, jaw clenching in a way that made Sebastian want to laugh in his face, although he decided against it. “I don’t like you.”

“Fun, I don’t like you either,” he replied with a smirk, happy to at least hear admitted out loud what everyone knew was the truth. He was sure that Kurt whined about him to everyone else in the glee club, bitchy phone calls and condescending comments, but he was yet to say anything to his face. 

“I don’t like the way you talk to my boyfriend, the way you’ve come into this club and managed to somehow take control of rehearsals and members and you’re trying to get in the way of my relationship. I’m on to you, and don’t think for a second that Blaine will fall for any of this,” Kurt stated, a steely tone to his voice combined with that faux sweetness he so often used. 

“He isn’t ‘your boyfriend’, he’s a real person, Hummel, and he’s too good for you,” he replied, hands in his pockets and staring down at him. “And I haven’t done anything that people don’t want me to, or asked to get any of this control, it was simply given to me because I’m qualified and talented. I haven’t laid a finger on Blaine, which you would know if you weren’t so blinded by your jealousy and fear of losing your boyfriend, and actually paid him some attention and respect for once. But by all means, keep treating him like he isn’t the most talented person you know, because all that’s going to do is drive him away.”

Sebastian moved to go finish stacking away the equipment, not wanting to let Kurt actually get to him, when this conversation should mean nothing. Of course he wasn’t that lucky when the other boy walked in front of him, stopping him from going anywhere.

“Oh drive him away to you? Is that right? You wouldn’t know a relationship if it smacked you across the face Smythe, and being rich and an asshole are not personality traits, especially not one’s Blaine is interested in.”

At least someone admits he’s an asshole.

“Well seeing as I’m the one of out of the two of us that encouraged him to go for the lead role in West Side which he deserves, whereas you wanted to have it all to yourself, maybe I know a thing or two. Live your life Hummel, do whatever you want, even keep dressing like Elton John’s understudy I don’t give a fuck, but don’t get surprised when your boyfriend wants to speak to someone who actually encourages him the way he should, and gives him the attention he deserves,” Sebastian spat back, hating the way he allowed himself to get angry, get affected by this bullshit that shouldn’t affect him.

He didn’t want to give Kurt the satisfaction of knowing he got a rise out of him, although he did enjoy the affronted look on his face, so he sacked off tidying up and just walked out of the auditorium, that familiar itch to run to Scandals come back, but with a sour taste entwined with it, more bitter than usual.

~

The next few days were mainly taken up with soccer and swimming training, glee put on hold for some reason as the final auditions took place and the tensions between Mercedes and Rachel reached new heights. 

The frustrations Mercedes had seemed perfectly valid to him - he’d been at the school a month and already found Rachel favorited and insufferable, he could only imagine what the last few years must’ve been like as she was rewarded every solo without question. Sebastian tried to bring that up several times to anyone who would listen, partly for his own sanity as if he ended up having to spend actual time with Rachel whilst choreographing the show he would probably rip off his own skin, but nobody but Santana seemed like they wanted to listen. 

He had taken to having lunch with the cheerleader often, enjoying her horrible company, even though a weird rumour started going round that they were dating. Sebastian was disgusted that people thought he was straight, and Santana was horrified people would think she would sleep with Sebastian - even though they both knew she was gay as well. It went fairly unspoken, but they had a silent bond and respect for one another that terrified everyone else and pleased them greatly. 

After a particularly enjoyable lunch together in the cafeteria which had consisted of nothing but making fun of Schuester, Sebastian found himself walking to class alone before being visually affronted by Kurt and Blaine in front of him.

Hummel was holding out a large bouquet of flowers, thrusting them at his boyfriend, seemingly unaware that the middle of a public school corridor was not a romantic location in the slightest. 

He watched and listened as Blaine was presented with the flowers and a congratulations, Kurt declaring that he was proud of his boyfriend and that he deserves the role of Tony, a speech likely practised yet the gesture was admittedly sweet. 

Sebastian glared over at them, watching Blaine grin joyously, hugging and thanking Kurt, the two of them the perfect depiction of the modern gays, annoyingly happy and romantic and everything Sebastian wasn’t. The worst part was that he knew this all came around after he called out Hummel on his behaviour, bringing his attention to what he’d been doing wrong and how he’d been treating his boyfriend.

So this sickening reunion and apology was basically all his fault, and he brought together the couple he wanted nothing more than to tear apart. It hurt, and he wasn’t sure why, just burning with the knowledge that Blaine could do better, that if it took  _ Sebsatian  _ to bring this change around then it wasn’t worth it anyway. 

It hurt to see them happy, in love, peaceful. He wanted to rip it up, but also was starting to think he didn’t want to have to see the pieces that would be left.

He watched as Kurt pressed a kiss to his cheek and left, and he watched as Blaine turned around and saw him, smiling as he made his way over. 

“Look, everything turned out great with Kurt, I told you it would!” he exclaimed as he clutched the bouquet tightly and eyes shone, and it hurt how beautiful he looked when he stared down at the flowers. 

“Well done, your boyfriend managed to do the base level qualification for a relationship - be happy for you, it’s great it took him over a week to get there,” Sebastian replied with an eye roll, not wanting to look at Blaine and see that disappointed expression. “What’s next? Gonna give him a blowjob for not cheating on you?”

He regretted the words as he said them, aware he was just shitting on Blaine for no reason when he was happy, but he was tired, needed to get laid, and thinking of Hummel made him want to be shot. 

“Sebastian…” Blaine started, his voice soft but upset, and he couldn’t help but look down and see the disappointment in those eyes. “He really wanted it, and needed it for his NYADA application ok, it’s not as simple as that. Maybe one day you’ll understand.”

That choice of words shocked him a bit, brow furrowing as he stared at Blaine, and he could see the other boy’s eyes drift to the hickies visible on his throat, marks of his attitudes towards relationships, ones he didn’t regret but that differed from Blaine’s experiences. 

He watched Blaine walk away, wanting to set fire to those stupid flowers and throw them away, an empty gesture stemming from insecurities and his own insults, that Kurt had turned into a form of redemption, as if he wasn’t still upset. It was infuriating, and Sebastian didn’t know why he even cared so much, but all he knew was that he did. 

Things just seemed to get worse from there, as Berry got the lead in the musical which was beyond upsetting, and then Mercedes left the glee club, which was devastating. 

Sure, Sebastian only cared because now they were even further away from having enough people to compete, even with that Quinn girl back - who was a lot less cool without her pink hair - but still. 

If he was going to be in this stupid club he was going to win, and even though that once meant winning Blaine, it was turning more into them as a show choir.

  
  


~

Before Sebastian could throw himself into dragging the New Directions out of complete and utter mediocrity, he had to suffer through West Side Story first, which was the new bane of his existence. 

Mostly he was preoccupied with the choreography, working alongside Mike and sometimes Brittney to get it done, as well as having a supporting role in the cast, which to be fair was little to no effort.

Artie was a bit of a maniac as director, and Berry was a complete diva of a lead actress, and the increasing tension between the members of the glee club was frankly fucking everything up which made his job a lot harder. 

Just the previous day, Blaine had done a performance of ‘Last Friday Night’ that yes, was admittedly a bit cheesy and dorky, but still fun and entertaining, especially the way he grabbed Sebastian’s hands to make him dance alongside him. He enjoyed that even more than the glare on Hummel’s face. 

But for some reason it made Lopez get all weird and storm up, and she wouldn’t even tell him why when he started pestering about it, getting all snappy and walking off to find Brittany, ignoring him for the rest of the day. And that set off Blaine’s anxieties about not fitting in within the New Directions, having people blame him for things out of his control and feeling like an outsider, which bled into his attitude in rehearsals.

He didn’t think that the week could get worse after he was kicked in the head during soccer and forced to watch Hummel act in rehearsals, when Hudson broke some news that had him literally barging through the hallways to corner Santana against her locker. 

“You better tell me right now that Frankenteen was playing a really bad joke and what he just told me in the locker room isn’t true,” Sebastian demanded, not liking the way she sighed a little and rolled her eyes. 

“Don’t take it personally, Fievel, it has nothing to do with you - the New Directions just isn’t the right fit for me, it’s the Rachel Berry show and it’s going to turn into the Blaine Anderson show soon enough.” He hated the way she brought Blaine into it; Berry actively sought out and demanded the centre of attention, Blaine only ever tried to help, or worked for what he had. 

His annoyance must’ve been evident from the way she scoffed at him. “Calm down, I’m not insulting your boyfriend, it’s just true. And if you cared more about being selfish and not panting over him you’d probably end up taking his spot as lead gay.”

Sebastian couldn’t really argue with that - if he joined the glee club and Blaine wasn’t there, that lead role would be his for the taking and he’d push over anyone to get there, but the truth was he liked the attention on Blaine, and would rather watch him than anyone else. Still, that didn’t distract from the fact that one of the only people he liked was abandoning him, what next, was Mike going to leave?

“Lopez, talk to Schuester, sort something out. You and Brittney can’t leave we’re completely fucked for sectionals then, and you’re leaving me with that room full of complete morons,” he moaned, aware that he wasn’t just annoyed at being dealt a bad hand in the competition, but that someone he now considered a friend was going. 

Santana sighed and crossed her arms, at least looking a little pained. “Smythe, the people in glee club are my friends, yeah. But this isn’t personal, this is professional. And the fact is, neither me, Brit, or Mercedes are treated well enough in there and given the respect we deserve. I want to sing, and perform, and that’s that.”

It made sense, really. Schuester was never going to give anyone but Berry the time of day, and it served him right to be dealt the repercussions of that now, and seeing their mess of a leader annoyed really did make Sebastian happy. But not at this cost.

He opened his mouth to say something but Santana beat him to it, pressing a finger against his lips. “No you can’t join us twink. Female group only.” 

“I wasn’t going to ask that,” he mumbled, both of them fully aware he was definitely going to ask that. She just gave him a wink and a pat on the arm, walking away from him whilst the conversation was on a high, before either of them could ruin it with a cruel comment, which was probably for the best. 

With every week that passed Sebastian seemed to find himself involved deeper and deeper with the New Directions, as they sunk their claws into him with no escape, but he didn't seem any closer to the reason he joined in the first place.

~

He found Blaine in the parking lot as he was heading towards his car to leave the school, flagging down the shorter boy to stop him getting in his own and driving off. 

“You know I talked to Lopez, it’s not your fault she’s leaving,” Sebastian announced as he walked over to Blaine’s car and leaned against the door. “She wouldn’t lie to me, if it was your fault she’d tell me and then you right to your face.”

Blaine wrapped his arms around himself and stared down at the ground, not looking convinced. “Three of the most talented people in the New Directions have left, two of which did so directly after I did a performance, you can’t blame me for being dubious about that. She literally said I was going to make everything about me.”

Sebastian hated McKinley 95% of the time, but Blaine was one of the things that made the place somewhat tolerable - even if most of that was made up of him staring at his ass - so seeing him so unhappy about the place made him frustrated, when it shouldn’t have to be him making things better in the first place. 

“I joined the same time as you, do you see me thinking about how everyone must secretly hate my existence?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. Blaine sighed and shook his head, waving a hand. 

“It’s not the same, you weren’t on an opposing show choir the year before.”

“And you’re not in that show choir anymore so why does it matter?”

Sebastian raised his eyebrows, still leaning against the car but looking directly at Blaine’s worried eyes, tone firm. “Look, it sucks Lopez has gone, trust me I’m pissed about it, but don’t put it on yourself when you actively helped out the New Directions by joining. Without you, all three of them still would’ve left, and I wouldn’t have joined, so there would’ve literally only been six losers in the club anyway.”

Blaine stayed quiet but breathed out, Sebastian’s words clearly getting through a little bit.

“Just, try and enjoy West Side Story, forget about sectionals until after it. Are you inviting anyone from your old school?” he asked, which caused Blaine to perk up a little.

“Oh, I was thinking about inviting the Warblers, but I wasn’t sure. Kurt said it might be a little weird as they’re our competition but they’re my friends, and I do miss them,” Blaine admitted, softly smiling at the mention of his old classmates.

“It’s a musical which has nothing to do with show choir, you should ask them to come killer, especially since you’re the lead. And, uh, didn’t Hummel go to Dalton? I’m sure he wouldn’t mind seeing some of them anyway,” Sebastian added in an attempt to be nice, as upsetting Blaine when he was down was a dick thing to do even for him. 

“He was only there for a little bit, and I don’t know, he never really gelled with them the way I did, we became friends pretty quickly and so that was enough for him I guess,” Blaine shrugged, hands now in his pockets. “But I’ll ask them, probably go over to Dalton next week.”

The shorter boy looked happy, and Sebastian felt a warmth flood through him at the thought of him being the one to make him feel that. He pushed those feelings down, annoying and inconvenient, instead putting on a smirk and taking his car keys out his pocket. 

“Ask if any of them are single, if that school produces guys like you sign me up for 10,” he said with a wink, laughing at Blaine’s eye roll. “See you later killer.”

Sebastian gave the boy in front of him a final smile and headed for his car, a part of him wishing that Blaine was coming with him. 

~

Opening night was approaching fast, and Sebastian ended up spending most of the time in the McKinley auditorium, choreographing sweaty, untalented teenagers the majority of which were nowhere near the right ethnicity for the roles they were playing. It wasn’t exactly what he thought he’d be doing when he started at the school, 

Hudson had somehow managed to get them a new recruit for glee club at least, even if sectionals were momentarily forgotten whilst the musical was in focus, but the Irish kid could sing - even if Sebastian had no fucking clue what he was saying most of the time. 

Currently, he was on the stage of the auditorium after Abrams had forced him to stay behind to watch Blaine and Rachel run through ‘Tonight’ for the hundredth time, claiming he wanted his ‘expertise’, whatever that meant. He was never going to pass up an opportunity to watch Blaine perform however, so he sat himself down next to the football coach, preparing to block out everything Rachel did for the next two minutes.

The two of them ran through the song, both of their voices beautiful and they did make a convincing couple, bringing back the memory of Santana describing in detail the time they made out at Berry’s party, which was a particularly funny story he was never going to let slide, mainly out of annoyance that he had missed it. 

He was pretty sure the football coach was crying when they finished, but Artie had that same, slightly unimpressed look on his face. Sebastian still didn’t have his whole deal figured out.

“Do you see what the problem is?” the director said to him, eyebrows raised and hands splayed out as if the answer was obvious. 

Sebastian frowned a bit and stared at Blaine who looked equally unaware. “Uh, no? Apart from the fact you have a white Maria there isn’t a problem.” He ignored Rachel’s protesting. 

Artie just rolled his eyes and sighed out dramatically, wheeling forwards to be in the centre of the two groups. “The problem is in the emotions - you’re simply not convincing enough as young lovers. Have either of you ever even had sex?”

The two actors both blushed, starting to make awkward denials and spoke with stuttering voices, in the most obvious display of virginity Sebastian had ever seen. He was a little taken aback with Artie’s question, but honestly even more surprised at the answer he got. Not from Rachel, she was as sexless as a mannequin, but the fact that Blaine was a virgin was more surprising than he thought it would be. 

Not that he could ever imagine Hummel in any sexual position, but he also couldn’t imagine having Blaine as a boyfriend and not absolutely worshipping that body, it seemed like such a waste really. 

He’d wanted to fuck him 10 seconds after seeing him for the first time after all. 

Artie continued, spouting stuff about sex and passion, every word making the lead actors go deeper shades of red and looking more and more uncomfortable, until at one point the football coach ran out, and then everyone else started to leave. 

Sebastian had only been paying attention to the flush creeping down Blaine’s neck, and wondering how far down it went. 

After Rachel had gone as well, practically running off the stage in a fit of embarrassment, it just left him alone with Blaine, who had an amalgamation of uncomfortable and thought on his face. Sebastian made his way over to the other boy who was rearranging some of the set, probably to go over his own solo numbers again like he so often did, rehearsing more than anyone in the show. 

“So Artie is insane, right?” Sebastian chuckled, snorting at the way Blaine groaned and nodded, looking down at his feet. “And you’re a virgin, that’s interesting.”

His head shot up at that, mouth opening and closing a few times as if unsure what to say, looking completely taken aback by Sebastian’s blunt statement. “U-uh, interesting? How is that interesting?”

Sebastian shrugged and took a few steps closer, closing some of the distance between them. “Well you’ve been with Kurt a while now, it’s not ridiculous to assume you two would’ve fucked. You guys are teenagers, it’s kinda all we do.”

“Not every teenager is having sex all the time Sebastian, not in the real world,” Blaine replied as he scrunched his nose up a little, face still pretty red. “There’s nothing wrong with choosing to wait until you’re ready.”

He held up his hands in resistance at that and stopped a few feet in front of the other boy who was looking particularly defiant. “Not trying to judge killer. It’s just, sex is fun, feels good, personally couldn’t imagine hanging about much.”

The two of them had briefly spoken about Sebastian’s sexual exploits before, primarily comments that he said in front of various people to make them all uncomfortable and/or impressed, depending on the amount of heterosexuality present at the time. Puck had once high fived him when he mentioned a threesome which was a particularly odd moment but he took it as a win. 

“I’m sure it is fun, and it will be fun when I do it with Kurt for the first time and it’ll be special, that’s what’s important to me,” Blaine replied confidently, staring at his face. Sebastian noticed his cheeks were still a little flushed, even though Artie had left a while ago. He took another step closer. 

“Haven’t you ever been curious? Wondered what it would feel like to just let go, rip off each other’s clothes, feel someone else’s skin beneath your own??”

He was getting dangerously close to crossing a line, now standing directly in front of Blaine who had to tilt his neck up a little to see him. His voice had lowered a bit unconsciously, and he knew that he should probably back away and leave, but there was something about the way Blaine’s pupils had darkened and his face coloured that left him incapable of turning around, feet cemented to the floor.

“You could give yourself over to them, or let yourself take control, hands pinned back and teeth on skin.”

Sebastian knew he had most definitely crossed a line when he reached out a hand and dragged a few fingers down Blaine’s forearm, the touch burning him and leaving a trail of goosebumps down the other boy’s skin, accompanied by an involuntary shudder. He knew that he could probably lean down and kiss him now, push him against the wall and claim his lips, but something stopped him. 

The thought of Blaine not speaking to him again crossed his mind too vividly, and Sebastian knew that he had to let the other boy make the first move, and he was aware that wasn’t going to be on the stage of the McKinley auditorium. 

He took a single step back, feeling the tension snap as he moved, Blaine’s face seeming to recover from the trance he’d been in. “I’m going to Scandals tomorrow, you and Hummel should come along,” Sebastian announced, not sure why he included Kurt’s name in that sentence, but his mind was probably correct in thinking that was the only way Blaine would ever come. “I’ll get you two some fake ID’s, and you guys can learn to live a little.”

Blaine looked as if he was going to immediately say no, shut him down with a roll of the eyes, but Sebastian’s teasing tone must have got the better of him. 

“Sure, sounds good. We’ll see you there,” he said defiantly, speaking as if calling out his bluff. As if Sebastian would ever bluff about a gay bar. 

“I’ll text you the details, tell Hummel not to look like he usually does.”

Sebastian gave him a final wink before walking off the stage, trying not to think too hard about the fact that Blaine hadn’t pushed him away. 

~

Sometime the next day Blaine went to Dalton, according to the way other members of the New Directions were grumbling about it in rehearsals. He had chimed in to point out that the Warblers would be coming to watch a musical which had nothing to do with the show choir, but logic was clearly frowned upon from the way he was completely ignored. 

All he knew was that Hummel had somehow accepted his offer and the three of them were going to Scandals that night, which was honestly a disaster in the making and he couldn’t be more excited. Sebastian was destructive, undermining, and callous, and he had splintered more relationships than he could count in his life, it was what he was good at. 

He was hot and confident with money to throw around, and he made boys cheat on their girlfriends with him and men cheat on their wives, and he never once thought about it.

This time, he wasn’t sure what he felt. 

He wanted Blaine, but he didn’t want Blaine hurt, so he wasn’t sure what to do. Forcing himself between him and Hummel only seemed like a surefire way to break his heart and that wasn’t the outcome he desired, but then what was? It was a cocktail of feelings that were infuriating, and he needed tonight if only just to drink and find someone to fuck in the toilet. 

Kurt had collected his and Blaine’s ID’s at school, so he got to the bar before them, sitting on a stool and leaning against the slightly sticky surface, nursing his own cocktail with the drinks he’d ordered for the other two in front of him. 

They arrived, Blaine still in a bow tie and sweater vest which shouldn’t have been as endearing as it was, because holy shit that was a strange thing to wear to a bar, but  _ somehow _ he pulled it off and looked hot. Couldn’t say the same for Hummel but he didn’t expect as much. 

“Hey guys, good to see you got in alright,” he announced as they came over, clearly both of their first time in a place like this from the wide eyed stares and shuffling feet. “I got a beer for Blaine, and a shirley temple for you Kurt, as I hear you’re the designated driver, like always.” Sebastian handed over their drinks and grinned his teeth, ignoring Kurt’s eye roll. 

“Thanks Seb, didn’t need to get us drinks,” Blaine smiled over the tip of his bottle, taking a swig with ease, whilst Kurt just sucked aggressively on his straw out the corner of his mouth. 

“Don’t worry about it, we’re here for a good time so get whatever you want,” Sebastian replied, nodding at both of them for good measure; if Hummel died of thirst Blaine would probably get upset anyway. They settled into easy conversation at the bar, and he was filled in with Blaine’s trip to Dalton, and apparently the Warblers were all going to go to the musical which clearly made him very happy from the way his face lit up at it.

Kurt said it would be nice to see them, and it only sounded partly forced, so that was something at least - Sebastian was just looking forward to seeing the guys in uniforms backstage, and hoping they would be open to fraternising with the enemy. 

One drink turned to three, and Blaine’s love of dancing apparently just amplified with alcohol, as he tried to start dragging them both to the dancefloor, giddy on his feet. Sebastian obliged willingly, tilting his head at Kurt who politely declined, clearly deciding he was too sober to join in. His loss. 

Blaine’s bow tie ended up undone around his neck, top few buttons loose and exposing lines of neck that were teasing Sebastian with how much they wanted to be kissed. He wasn’t dancing particularly sexily, mainly just like how he did in glee club, but it was still ridiculously attractive, spinning around and giggling as he went, occasionally grabbing at his arms to twist them around. 

He found himself having actual fun, focused on the boy in front of him rather than glancing around the room for a warm body to have underneath him, letting himself dance lazily and borderline goofily, not concerned about who was watching. The intention of the night hadn’t been for him to have a very PG experience with Blaine, but he found himself somewhat happy about how it turned out. 

Still, his mind was semi focused on the way the other boy’s hips moved and body stretched the whole night, the stretch of his shirt across biceps and tightness of his pants impossible to ignore, but he restrained from reaching out and pulling them flush against one another, even if that was all he wanted to do. Sometimes he pushed it a little, moving closer than perhaps he ought to, feeling the heat of Blaine’s skin radiating off him, the sweat visible as it shone on his forehead. 

It was at moments like that when he wondered how on earth his friend could ever doubt himself, when he was the most entrancing person he had ever come across. 

Honey eyes were blown wide, shining under the shitty lights of the bar, face lit up in a smile, and Sebastian had never seen him so relaxed and carefree, the euphoria rolling off him in waves. Before he could do anything stupid, like close the distance between them any further, another body cut in front of him as Kurt shimmied between them, clearly deciding to start paying attention to his boyfriend now. 

Sebastian was surprised it had taken him that long, but backed off willingly. He wasn’t going to do anything to ruin Blaine’s night, and he should probably dance with his boyfriend anyway.

The three of them were together for under 15 minutes before the couple said goodbye to him, Blaine giving him a quick hug and thanking him for the invite, smile still wide as ever on his face, claiming he’d had the best night he’d had in a while. Once they’d gone, it was the same as it usually was, Sebastian alone and mildly tipsy, eyes staring around the room for a suitable target.

No one seemed worth it though, as his brain offered up a list of reasons why they wouldn’t be suitable, why they weren’t what he wanted. It was ridiculous, he’d never exactly been fussy, but nothing seemed to be doing it for him tonight, and he couldn’t even be bothered to drink anymore, the night seeming fruitless now Blaine had left. 

He mentally cursed himself as he pathetically made the decision to go home, his mood now significantly worse than it was half an hour ago. Sticky with sweat and head lightly pulsing from alcohol he pushed out of the bar, pulling his phone out his pocket to try and call a cab as he started off towards the edge of the car park. Being picked up from Scandals usually came with suspicion and thinly veiled judgement so he usually went to the gas station down the road. It was easier than being asked how old he was and having the bites on his neck analysed. 

As he set off, mildly stumbling, he noticed a crumpled figure sat on the pavement just outside the parking lot, a head in hands and knees pushed up to the chest. Usually that would make him steer in the opposite direction, the thought of dealing with a drunk emotional person extremely off putting, but the colour of the shirt and the sight of a sweater vest caught his eye, and he realised that was  _ Blaine _ .

He instantly felt a rush of panic, as there was no way someone like Blaine should be alone late at night, especially not round here and after he’d been drinking, so he approached his sunken figure with a worried feeling growing inside him.

“Blaine?” he asked tentatively, voice not too loud as not to scare him. “Is there a reason you look like an abandoned puppy at the side of the road?”

His lead lifted off his knees and stared up at him, eyes wet and rimmed with red, his jaw set firmly as if he couldn’t decide whether or not to cry or punch something, although it was possibly both. 

“Don’t,” Blaine spat out quietly, a lump in his throat. Sebastian ignored his warning and sat himself down next to him, knocking their legs together but staring straight ahead. 

“I can’t help but notice you are a lot less happy than you were when you left the bar, so I’m assuming something happened,” he continued, fighting off the urge to wrap an arm around him because that’s not what he did.

Blaine huffed out a cold, wet laugh next to him, eyes steely instead of the warm they were earlier. “Nice one, I can tell you went to private school with a brain like that.” Sebastian turned to look at him, eyebrows raised, slightly impressed by his annoyance.

“It’s my fault, we were leaving and I started to kiss him, saying we should have sex or whatever, I came on way too strong, was too drunk and too much, and Kurt got mad,” Blaine continued, shrinking in on himself the more that he spoke. “He said he didn’t want to do anything with me because I was drunk and spent the night dancing with you, and he left.”

Sebastian gave a small nod, trying not to let his face betray the multitude of expressions he was feeling. He had never seen anyone look as vulnerable and fragile as Blaine did in that moment, and he really wasn’t the right person to deal with it, but he was also the only person around. 

“Look, trying to have sex with your boyfriend for the first time like that probably wasn’t the best idea,” he started, holding up a hand to cut off Blaine before he could interject. “But don’t feel guilty about dancing with me, as trust me everything we were doing was entirely innocent, and Kurt could’ve joined in any moment he wanted to. Apologise to him for the kissing and whatever but don’t apologise about that.” Sebastian sighed a little, breath puffing out a small cloud in front of him. 

He gave in to his better judgement and wrapped an arm around Blaine’s shoulders, letting his head rest on top of his curls. “And he shouldn’t have left you out here alone, that’s not ok. Not when you’re as cute as you are.” Blaine snorted at that, delivering a weak elbow into his side but meaning nothing of it, and Sebastian felt him relax into his arm a bit. 

Having him there, sharing the same space and the same warmth, it was the most intimate thing Sebastian had experienced in his life. 

He’d had countless boys underneath him, inside of him, pinned down and moaning his name, but nothing had ever filled him with the warmth this had, his toes curling and fingers tingling slightly. The cold air whipped around them, and the alcohol had started to wear off more now, so he tugged Blaine a bit closer and let their knees rest against one another, molding into one body. 

Maybe a few seconds passed, maybe a few minutes, he didn’t even know, but it just felt so right to sit there beside him, and hold him even in just one arm. 

The temperature did get too much however, and when his skin started to go numb from the air and not just the boy beside him, Sebastian gave a final squeeze and then pulled himself up, stretching out his muscles and extending a hand down to Blaine to get him up as well. 

“Come on let’s get you home. If we stay here any longer we’re gonna become part of the permanent scenery and your ass is too nice to be frozen to the ground.”

Blaine rolled his eyes but let a smile grace his lips as he accepted Sebastian’s hand and pulled himself up, their fingers lingering just for a moment before they let go, arms at their sides. He let Blaine lead the way, foregoing calling a cab as he would just get one after he knew that Blaine was home safe, and he knew he lived somewhat nearby to the bar anyway. 

They mainly walked in silence, hands sometimes brushing but keeping a respectful distance apart now that the alcohol was wearing off, but Blaine still was stumbling a little. Easy chatter passed between them at times, small bursts of conversations between the quiet, but nothing was forced, and even the silences felt full and natural. 

Before long they arrived, Blaine’s house the kind of new money, four bed home he imagined it to be, a symbolic white fence and red door which he walked him up to, hands in his pockets.

“Thank you, you didn’t have to walk me home,” Blaine murmured, looking down at his feet with sad eyes and a resigned expression. He was now sober and the regret and guilt must’ve been crashing down on him in heavy waves. 

Sebastian thought about going for a hug, but resisted, instead giving his arm a soft squeeze and a light smile, not wanting to get too close because he didn’t know what that would mean. “Don’t worry about it, it’s worth it to get you back safe, plus it’s always nice to sober up a little before I get home.” Blaine gave a small nod, smile not reaching his eyes but he didn’t expect it too. 

“Goodnight killer, see you later,” he whispered, dropping his arm. He turned and left the porch, hearing the soft open and close of the door behind him, and tried not to think about the way he knew Blaine would be crying himself to sleep and there was nothing he could do about it.

~

The days leading up to the musical were a blur, and Sebastian knew Blaine was ignoring him, but frankly he was too busy to have time to think about it too much. All his time was consumed by rehearsals or sports practice, collapsing in bed every night and getting up the next day to do it all again, wondering why he was putting in so much effort for a school he hated. 

When opening night finally came around it was a relief, knowing that soon this all would be over, although he’d also be lying if he said he wasn’t excited for the actual performances. He was only Baby John in the actual production, having been asked to flesh out the cast, but still felt responsible for all the choreography, and considering the lack of dance ability pretty much everyone had, it was a lot of stress. 

Backstage everyone was in a wild panic, as expected. Sebastian had done his own hair and makeup pretty quickly, and was just waiting around for things to start, which thankfully looked like it was happening soon. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Blaine pacing around, biting at his lip and brow furrowed, more nervous than he’d seen him before.

For a second Sebastian deliberated if he should go over or not, seeing as they hadn’t properly spoken since Scandals, but also if the lead actor fainted before even going on stage that was more trouble for all of them, so he sighed and walked over, cursing his new found ability for empathy. 

“Anderson relax, you’re going to kill it out there,” he said, stopping in front of him. Blaine breathed out, rolling back his shoulders and looking up at the ceiling.

“What if Artie was right, and I can’t give the right emotions because I’m a virgin?” he sighed. Sebastian let himself roll his eyes but resisted laughing, knowing anything would set Blaine off right now. 

“That guy is insane, it’s called acting, literally everything is made up, he has no idea what he’s talking about.” Blaine didn’t look any less calm, so Sebastian swallowed his pride and changed his angle, needing to get through to him, especially as the ensemble got ready to go on stage.

“Look, it’s about love, and connection, and relationships. Not sex or lust or any of that shit. You’re channeling a romantic passion, yearning and affection, young love and everything that comes with it. You don’t need sex for that, and you don’t need it in your performance,” he explained, swallowing the hurt in his throat. It seemed to work though, as Blaine’s expression shifted and he seemed to lose some of the tension in his body. 

Sebastian knew it was because he was picturing Kurt, and that tore him.

“I guess,” he said quietly, before looking up to meet his eyes and giving a smile. “You’re right, it’s about love, and I know what that is, and so does Rachel.”

He nodded, knowing he’d done his job here, even if it hurt him for some reason to do it. “You got it killer, now get out there.”

Blaine smiled and squared his shoulders, some of that familiar confidence seeping back in. “Thank you, Seb, for everything.” He gave him a light touch of the arm and then set off to the wings, crossing paths with Mike who had come to collect Sebastian, and the two Jets left together to get ready for their entrance. 

~

As far as he could tell, it was a resounding success. The audience seemed to love it, nothing went horrifically wrong, and there wasn’t even any abuse about how the majority of people playing Puerto-Rican characters were very, very white. Although they would have deserved that.

Blaine was enigmatic on the stage, and sharing any time at all with him was a pleasure, which the crowd definitely agreed with as when it came to take their bows, his was by far the loudest. That was also helped by the group of navy and red blazers who screamed his name, jumping out of their seats and attracting judgemental looks from nearby parents but not caring. 

Rushing off the stage he found himself swept up in various hugs he didn’t want and group embraces which were uncomfortable and weird, but it was still pretty rewarding when he was congratulated alongside Artie for his work, a genuine smile on his face at the attention. They were going to some weird restaurant as an after party - and he did point out that it sounded like the lamest after party to ever exist - so were all trying to round each other up to leave, needing to eat after the adrenaline started to wear off. 

Sebastian set off down a corridor to head to the reception where Blaine had last been seen, to drag his ass back to get his things and leave for the restaurant, as no one wanted to go without their Tony. He spotted him chatting animatedly with a large group of boys that he made out to be the Warblers, all in their uniforms looking extremely out of place in the McKinley halls, reminding him of the school he should’ve been sent to. 

“Anderson! They’re going to start a revolt if they don’t get their shitty Italian food soon,” Sebastian said as he approached the cluster of guys, not so subtly eyeing them all up.

Blaine smiled when he saw him, stepping back to make room for him in the group. “Sebastian, these are the Warblers, my friends from Dalton. Guys this is Sebastian, he’s new this year too and choreographed the show,” he announced, gesturing round. 

He wasn’t shy in his looking, trying to see which ones were gay, or not straight enough that they’d be willing to sleep with him - he’d had experience ‘turning’ a few people. There was a guy who was  _ definitely _ gay, and he looked like a knock off Blaine which would be ideal, but a tall blond guy had an arm wrapped round him which probably ruled him out. 

“Pleasure,” Sebastian said, noticing a few looks back and noting the ones who blushed. “We’re all going to some shitty Italian place, feel free to tag along if you want.” Blaine positively beamed at the idea, grinning at him and nodding around, the rest of the Warblers seeming to agree at least.

He took Blaine by the elbow and led him back to the dressing room, saying to the Dalton boys they’d meet them there, but needing to physically drag their Tony away in order to get him to go, practically buzzing with leftover adrenaline and bouncing off the walls. 

As Sebastian had expected the restaurant was awful, tacky, and just upsetting to his general palette, but even he could admit it was a pretty fun atmosphere to be in, everyone riding the high from the show and excitedly talking about the following night’s performance. Plus, he got the numbers of three different Warblers and made out with one outside the back of the building, so it was a win. 

As he gripped the lapels of the blazer, he could almost imagine it was Blaine in the uniform. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you sm for reading!!! im killer-leo on tumblr xoxoxo


	3. the rain is always gonna come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok this one LONG long....uhh  
> also it's p sebastian focused, and him with other characters, obvs with seblaine but the blaine content will start increasing from here i reckon!!!
> 
> this is also the last of what is prewritten, and i havent done any of the next chap, so the next update wont be ridiculously fast as uni is beating me with a blunt object currently but we move!!
> 
> shoutout to quinn ella and zach, for putting up with my random questions, and also for being very cool sexy and gay
> 
> this covers episodes 3x06, 3x07, 3x08
> 
> thank you sm for reading and the lovely comments, hope you enjoy!!!

Facing the reality that Santana, Brittney, and Mercedes were out of the New Directions was fairly traumatising. Sebastian had a hard enough time being in glee club anyway, and now the three coolest people had gone, with their excellent voices, superb dancing, and generally non horrible personalities. 

Those that were left were just so disappointing. 

Mike and Blaine were the exception, and he was currently watching them sing and dance back up for the guy who looked and acted like he should be applying for jail after graduation, singing a song about wanting to fuck a teacher. He didn’t understand how everyone was so oblivious as Puckerman was obviously directing this performance at Rachel’s mom and the adoptive mother of his own child...God, he hated McKinley. 

Luckily for him Blaine was currently jumping and lunging and borderline caressing the microphone in a very sexual way that was distracting enough he didn’t have to think about the fucked up dynamics of the group, or the lack of the three girls. 

He had asked, again, if he could join the Troubletones, but for some reason they insisted on it being a girl group, whatever. He still ate lunch with Santana and Brittney most days to bitch about Hummel and Berry, screw the fact they were competition.

The main problem now, he thought, as he watched Blaine’s biceps tighten as he gripped the mic stand, was that they had nowhere near enough people to compete in sectionals, and absolutely no one seemed to care. The musical was over, thank god, so there was nothing that could be used as an excuse to ignore that they wouldn’t even be able to compete in the thing everyone was so set on winning. 

He was brought out of his thinking by the end of the performance, so he absentmindedly clapped whilst making a mental note to try and get more members, as well as rolling his eyes at the bullshit flowing from Puckerman’s mouth. Schuester remained oblivious to the highly inappropriate nature of the song, which wasn’t too surprising seeing as his only friends were teenagers, but instead started talking to them about meeting in the auditorium later for a ‘surprise’. 

Seeing as this was McKinley, that surprise could range from them being attacked by guard dogs or given chlamydia, so it was safe to say he wasn’t particularly excited, but fortunately, Blaine saddled up next to him as they left the choir room, heading out to the courtyard together. He had a light sheen of sweat on his skin from the performance, making him glow more than he usually did. 

“Did you like the number? Puck’s weird but it’s always nice to dance with Mike.”

Sebastian nodded, slowing his pace slightly so the shorter boy didn’t have to walk as fast. “It was surprisingly not horrible, even though there’s no way he should be allowed to sing that in a school. You and Chang more than made up for it however.” 

Blaine looked up at him and smiled gratefully, however the expression didn’t quite reach his eyes. 

“What’s up killer? Not your usual perky self.”

“Nothing, not really,” Blaine started, before just sighing and dropping his shoulders as they moved outside to the courtyard. “Kurt’s senior class president campaign really isn’t going too well and it’s stressing us both out a lot - he wants it so bad and would be so amazing at it. And then on top of that Finn is still riding me so hard, ever since I started it’s like he has this personal vendetta against me and I don’t know why? He doesn’t exactly  _ love _ you but he is just so dismissive to me all the time.”

The words came out as a bit of a rush, finishing with him flopping down onto a table, steely look in his eye as he ran a hand through his hair. Sebastian couldn’t blame him really, Hummel was getting obliterated by Brittney in the campaign, as even though he was running on actual ideas, she was popular and hot, it really wasn’t a competition. And Finn…

“Hudson is an asshole to you because he’s threatened by you, B. It’s obvious, he’s jealous of your talent and likeability and he’s clinging on to this fragile masculinity that the new gay guy brings.”

Blaine blinked at him, brow furrowed. “You’re also the new gay guy, and he doesn’t ignore or chastise everything  _ you _ say?” He really was so oblivious sometimes. 

“Killer, you’re also a lot more talented than me, and just exude that ‘leading man’ persona that Hudson wants. Yeah, I’m a better dancer, but I think he lost hope on that a while ago; you’re the best male singer, the most well rounded performer, and he’s threatened of you. If I didn’t like you quite so much I’d probably be threatened as well,” Sebastian shrugged, giving his leg a little kick under the table. 

Usually, he would never admit anyone else’s superiority over him in a million years, but Blaine was different - he was better and that was ok. Sebastian was secure in himself and his role in the glee club, but aware that with the boy to girl ratio so far off now the Troubletones had formed, there was going to be a lot of infuriating masculinity floating around, and Hudson had better pull himself together. 

Blaine was biting his lip a bit in response to his statements, looking pretty deep in thought. “I don’t think I’m better than you Seb, you’re annoyingly talented really. And I’m not trying to ‘take over’ from Finn or whatever, I just want us to do well!” 

“It’s like, no one seems to care that we’re 2 people short to compete at sectionals” Sebastian added, to which Blaine groaned and flapped his hands in agreement.

“I know right? I tried bringing it up to Kurt but he’s too busy with student council, and Finn just got all defensive that he had recruited Rory. Like, yeah, that’s great, but we’re still short two people!”

He was happy one member of the New Directions had a sensible bone in their body at least, and very happy it happened to be Blaine, as he looked hot when he was angry. They continued chatting through the rest of their free period, switching between complaining about their fellow glee clubbers, and Blaine telling him stories about Dalton which pleased them both. His face lit up in a certain way when he mentioned the Warblers, and Sebastian almost felt guilty for having him there at McKinley, even if it had nothing to do with him.

Annoyingly, they had to get up and go to the auditorium for Mr Schue’s ‘surprise’, which was still slightly horrifying to him. He texted Santana on the way and she met them by her locker, side eyeing Blaine but letting Sebastian link their arms as they made their way to the theatre. 

Blaine was confused as to why Santana was going as well, and Sebastian realised he was probably the only one to have kept in such regular contact, as he explained the ‘surprise’ was for both glee clubs, leading them to theorise what it could be on the way. 

He suggested a fight to the death, Blaine suggested an arts and crafts session. Santana smacked them both. 

They pulled up to the auditorium together, walking in through the back to see their two separate glee clubs standing on either side of the stage in some kind of staring contest, Shelby and Mr Schue in the middle. Sebastian could feel Hummel’s glare on him as they walked down the steps and headed up on the stage, Blaine quickly joining the New Directions and leaning into his boyfriends’ side. Typical. 

He and Santana unlinked their arms as she pushed him off to his own club, probably knowing he would’ve tried to just stand with the Troubletones. It wasn’t his fault they were so much better. 

Both Mr Schue and Shleby then proceeded to start singing, so this surprise was turning out to be a punishment as he was forced to watch these two adults sing a weird mashup and dance around the piano together, he and Santana making eye contact and barely holding in their laughter. Because fuck sectionals, let’s just waste time doing this. 

It was announced they were going to be doing a ‘mash off’, and Sebastian just zoned out after that, because Schuester’s commitment to making them lose their upcoming competition really was admirable, but he wasn’t going to pay it much attention. Their teachers left, leaving only the students on stage, no one looking particularly happy about this decision. 

“Can’t wait to see what tuneless songs you guys pluck out from Schuester’s catalogue and have Hudson and Berry jiggle around to, I won’t even need to have a cold shower their pure lack of sex appeal will cool me right off,” Santana called out, the gaggle of cheerleaders behind her giggling. Sebastian wished he could be one of them. 

“I’m sorry Santana, you must be pretty nervous if you’re starting the insults this early, I’m sure it must feel bad to know you’re going to lose to the team you just abandoned.” Finn’s retort really wasn’t very good, but it was probably hard for him to think of so many words. 

“Why don’t we have our own little competition then? Not one chosen by Broadway rejects, the real high school way of having a showdown,” Santana continued, taking a few steps closer with a glint in her eye, arms crossed over her chest. Sebastian had no idea what they were talking about, having been privately educated his whole life, and sheltered from whatever barbaric activity they were about to suggest, and he started to rethink his decision to not buy a stab vest. 

Luckily, Hudson seemed to pick up on what she was saying and gave a strong nod in agreement, extending a hand to shake. “Gym, three o’clock.” Oh yeah, Sebastian was gonna get stabbed. 

~

Sebastian was  _ not _ going to get stabbed, but he wished he was.

Dodgeball was completely uncivilised, rough, and unnecessary violent - but he was still very good at it. Athleticism and sporting ability came to him naturally, as well as being surprisingly flexible, so he really had no problem in the game, not quite understanding how people could suck so much. 

Blaine was the other best player, the two of them working well to dodge, duck, dip and dive, the shorter boy  _ clearly _ a lot more competitive than he had initially let on. It had taken Sebastian a good 10 minutes ro recover from seeing him in those shorts however, which were just so ridiculously tiny it was unfair, hugging him in all the places that made Sebastian weak in the knees. He was pretty sure that Blaine’s thighs would be a permanent fixture of his dreams for the next two months. 

He had made sure to tell him that, of course, giving him a wink in the locker room that caused a whole body blush, Blaine trying to explain they were the only ones left, but they both knew there was a spare pile of longer shorts in the corner. If he was trying to distract him through the whole game, but it certainly worked.

Obviously the Troubletones won the match, seeing as nearly all of them were the schools best cheerleaders and the New Directions looked as if they were going to cry whenever a ball rolled near them, but Sebastian was still fairly proud of himself for being the last one standing. Santana took him out with a knock to the head, but a part of him was happy it was him that was hit, as he had a bad feeling if it had been someone else she would’ve been a lot more vicious, and things would have been a lot worse. 

He flipped her off but accepted defeat far more graciously than he usually would have, not resorting to an underhanded sneak attack when her back was turned which he might’ve done a few weeks ago. Well, if it was someone else he probably still would’ve done it now, but he didn’t think people would care as much if he pelted Berry in the face. 

Pretty much the only thing that whole session was good for was showing off himself and checking out Blaine. He did those two things every day anyway.

~

The whole ordeal seemed to affect Hudson though, who looked more constipated than usual in their next rehearsal, pacing up and down the front of the room. Sebastian lounged next to Blaine, deliberately knocking their shoulders together everytime Kurt looked over - petty? Yes. Necessary? Also yes.

He was still pissed off after the whole Scandals thing, the way he had left his boyfriend out there all alone. Thinking of that night made him annoyed in more ways than one, but he used Hummel as a scapegoat to cover up any other feelings he may have been experiencing out there on the sidewalk, Blaine curled under his arm. He didn’t want to think about it. 

“I think we should let our new guy take the lead on one of the songs,” he heard Finn say, and saw him staring directly at Blaine. Sebastian felt a surge of relief, happy that Hudson’s incessant rampage against him was over, finally apprecitaing his talents and -

“So what do you say, Rory?”

_ Who _ ?

Sebastian squinted at Finn, thinking maybe he just forgot Blaine’s name and said whatever first came to mind, but then he realised he was talking to someone sat behind them. He whipped his head around, taking in the pale looking kid sat nervously in the back row, who he only recognised as the Irish boy. Guess his name was Rory then. 

“Question - why not Blaine?” Sebastian found himself saying, words coming out of his mouth before he even realised he said them. “He hasn’t taken lead on a song yet and he’s our best male vocalist.”

The rest of the men in the room looked slightly affronted by that - save for Mike - and Finn appeared to be on the verge of kicking a music stand. 

“I’m just saying, Lopez literally just called us out on having you and Berry sing lead on absolutely everything we do, and so you’re going to keep on singing and just replace Rachel with some pasty guy that looks like he’ll pass out as soon as he gets on stage?” Blaine nudged his knee and gave him a sharp head jerk, as if wanting to deescalate the situation. 

“It’s ok, I think Rory will sound great on lead,” the shorter boy said with a smile, turning to look round appreciatively, infuriatingly nice. Sebastian wished he would just speak out a little more, and not be so goddamn generous all of the time; he knew Blaine could be confident and forthright, so why didn’t he act like it in the moments that mattered?

“I don’t know, I don’t think I’m ready really,” Rory stuttered out uncomfortably as everyone was now switching between looking at the three of them. Kurt remained silent, which was fairly unlike him, Sebastian just narrowing his eyes at the other man and sneering a little at his pursed lips. 

Finn stood at the front, arms crossed over his chest and biting at his lip. He had declared himself their leader, so it was now his decision to make, everyone staring at him expectantly. 

“Fine, whatever. I’ll pick the songs and Blaine and Sebastian will take the leads, how about that?” he ended up saying, gesturing over at the two of them in annoyance before stomping over to Rachel, clearly indicating the end of the discussion. 

It wasn’t often Sebastian was a little speechless, but this was close enough. He had no idea what possessed Hudson to give him one of the leads but he wasn’t about to complain - after Blaine he was the most talented/well rounded male performer there, so his judgement was on point at least. Finn had never exactly taken a shine to him though, probably confused that a gay guy was on several sports teams and was relatively popular whilst not dressing like Kurt - his brain probably couldn’t handle more than one presentation of sexuality.

“Well that was unexpected,” he said, leaning back in his chair as the room slowly started to empty, people going off to class. 

Blaine looked at him with an unreadable expression, somewhere between frustration and confusion. “You didn’t have to say that, you know. Now he’s just going to hate me more, and it’s not going to do me any favours with the rest of the club either.”

“Oh sorry, next time I’ll just let you be blatantly disrespected in front of everyone and let you be unappreciated and baited, that sound good to you?”

Kurt walked over to them, glaring at Sebastian then smiling at Blaine. “Don’t try and fool anyone by saying you did that selflessly, Smythe. You got lead vocals out of it as well, which was probably your plan all along.” He gave him a look up and down, eyes narrowed as he took his boyfriend’s hand in his. “Congratulations though Blaine, you deserve it.”

Sebastian was mildly intregued how Hummel’s mind had reached the conclusion that by speaking up for someone else that meant he wanted the lead all to himself, as even if he for some reason had come up with that stupid plan, there was no way Hudson would’ve been able to pick up on it. The two of them walked away, Blaine throwing a curious look over his shoulder at him, Sebastian wondering why he even opened his mouth in the first place.

~

Santana was being tight-lipped about their own performance, but she was more closed off in general as well, as things between her and Finn were escalating further, enough so everybody noticed it. The Troubletones were clearly taking this seriously, and the way things between the two main aggregators were going, the rivalry was more than just musical based, as the insults in the hallways became more and more aggressive. 

Sebastian cared very little about Hudson and thought Santana could handle herself, so tried to stay out of it whilst keeping tabs on what was going on, in case anything useful for later came up. Meanwhile they’d been rehearsing their dumb Hall and Oats number for a few days now, ready to perform. The songs were horrific, and he could already tell he was going to get teased so hard by the girls, although getting to see Blaine’s curly hair sort of made it worth it. 

He had no idea why he’d gel it down so much if it looked like that naturally, and he told him as much backstage.

“I’m serious killer, it’s hot. I mean you always look good, but this is super attractive on you.”

Blaine groaned at him and self consciously patted his hair, as if trying to glue it back down on his head with sheer force of will. “No it does  _ not _ look good. It’s all frizzy, and messy, and infuriating and I look like...broccoli.” He actually pouted as he said the vegetable, bottom lip jutting out and Sebastian had to swallow, hard.

“You don’t look like fucking broccoli Anderson don’t be so dramatic. At least you’re not wearing shoulder pads, I’m *this* close to stripping off completely and burning this jacket in a pile, but I wouldn’t want to give you a free show you’d enjoy a little too much,” he teased with a wink, revelling in Blaine’s blush of protest. 

Everyone else was finishing getting ready, their outfits hideous as they stretched and warmed up, the choreography done by himself and Mike a thousand times better than what Hudson suggested so they actually required movement now. There had been little resistance at Sebastian and Blaine taking the lead, despite no democratic process in it happening, and he figured most people were just happy it wasn’t Finn and Rachel for once and happy they didn’t need to listen to them. 

Kurt had seemed less than pleased, but that was probably a mixture of hating Sebastian and annoyed he only had a small part. He kind of figured whenever Kurt was annoyed it had something to do with him nowadays, and he was more than happy to provide that role in his life. 

Finn rounded them up, gave them a boring motivational speech before they headed onto the stage, standing in front of the band who were similarly dressed up in disgusting piano ties that made Sebastian want to be a little sick. Even floppy haired bass guy had his hair done up in a similar style as his own, which unlike his George Michael esque do, looked more like a lego figurine. 

As soon as they started, Sebastian turning around to open the song, he could see Santana stifling a laugh, Hudson’s song choices really not doing much for his attempts at popularity. It was primarily a duet between him and Blaine - who had no right to look as good as he did throughout the song - but it featured Quinn heavily which was nice. This performance was the first time he’d heard her sing, so it was good to know she wasn’t just a pretty face.

Santana was giving him afunny look as they danced, quirking an eyebrow whenever he and Blaine sang together, as if she knew something he didn’t. She did at least clap when they finished at least, although it was slightly less enthusiastic than a usual round of applause. 

He didn’t blame her, the shoulder pads truly were awful.

~

Sebastian was texting back one of the Dalton boys he’d got the number off of after West Side Story when he got a message from Santana, demanding he tell her where he was. There was no insult or snarky comment in the text that would usually have been there, which made him a little concerned, as he wasn’t sure they’d had a single conversation so far without her being bitchy.

Quickly he replied, saying he was out on the soccer field after practice, sat on the bleachers. The past few weeks he’d actually become fairly close with Santana, not that either one of them would ever admit it, and she was one of the only people in the school that didn’t make him want to gouge his eyes out. 

She must’ve been nearby, as pretty quickly he saw a lone cheerleader walking over to him, hands shoved in pockets, and gait less confident than he was used to seeing. Santana sat down next to him, a few inches away, silence settling between them. Usually, they’d both be talking rapidly at one another, lazy insults and joking banter, but the clear tension in her shoulders and tightness of her lips indicated he should probably wait. 

“I’ve been outed. They’re running a campaign ad against Sue and they’re outing me in it.”

Sebastian felt his heart drop, the shaking of her voice completely shattering him. There weren’t many things that made him emotional, but this was the one thing that would always catch him out.

“Finn said it loudly in the hallway, someone overheard. And that’s that.”

She was nearly choking out the words, thick and deep as tears threatened to spill. He looked at her face, trying to be as stoic and still as it usually was, but the mask was starting to crack, with the wobble of her lip and wetness of her eyes. 

“I haven’t even told my parents. Anyone.”

He leaned over, putting an arm around her shoulders and pulling her in close, tucking her under his body just as he had done to Blaine outside of Scandals. This would be something they’d never speak of, he knew that, but Santana wrapped an arm around his waist and held on tightly, allowing tears to spill over his soccer uniform. 

Words caught in his throat, not sure what he could say to make this better, not wanting to let his white hot fury at Hudson overcome his sympathy for her, as that would probably just turn everything even worse. Sebastian couldn’t help the anger though; Finn had just done the unthinkable, and put her whole life at risk, and he’d never wanted to slap him more.

This wasn’t his fight - his  _ place _ to create a scene though, an unnecessary male voice going in and causing patriarchal violence over the anguish and trauma of a young girl, not needing mindless violence on her behalf in some faux masculine display. 

Eventually, he managed to swallow, calming himself down enough to speak, although his words were muffled slightly by her hair.

“As much as I hate to admit it, the people at this school both love and care about you, and you’ll be safe here, comforted and protected by all the glee club losers if not anyone else. You are, without a doubt, the strongest person I know, and although no one deserves to go through this, you are the one person that could.” He took a deep breath, daring to rub a hand down her back comfortingly. 

“I was forced out of the closet when I was 14, my parents saw me kissing a boy. They’ve never understood, always been ashamed, thinking I was ruining their perfect suburban, conservative fantasy that’s just rooted in sexism anyway. I lashed out, sleeping with people twice my age, getting black out drunk twice a week and trying enough drugs I'd fail a piss test from just walking past one, because I didn’t have anyone else. But you do, Tana, and you’re better than me, better than I’ve ever been.”

She sniffled slightly against him, the sound of both of their breathing loud against the stands. “I have faith your parents won’t react like mine, but even if they do, then you move out and you stay with me, no questions asked. Even if you have to tell my parents you’re our new maid because that’s all their racist minds can handle, you’re moving in, ok?”

Sebastian gave her shoulder a light squeeze, letting her just lie against him for a while. It was more intimate than they’d ever be again, and this moment would never be discussed, but in times like this when they both knew the innate fear of their own sexualities and the terrifying truth of hatred, all they could do was hold one another.

It could have been seconds or minutes before Santana sat up, wiping her eyes and setting her jaw again, smoothing out her uniform. Sebastian straightened his back as well, both of their masks falling back on, emotions hidden. He stood up, grabbing his kit bag from beneath their feet and hopping down to the grass, before turning to look at her.

“If Hudson ever does anything again, I’ll make his time at this school a living hell, and that’s a promise.” He gave Santana a firm nod, no hint of teasing in his tone. She smiled gratefully, and they parted ways on the field, both knowing to not speak of this again.

~

Just the next day it was the Troubletones’ performance, and it was safe to say Sebastian was looking forward to this way more than he’d been looking forwards to their own. He hadn’t heard Santana or Mercedes sing in way too long and he was dying to hear some actual talent. Blaine stared down at his phone as Sebastian was typing away, texting back a different Warbler from the day before. Those Dalton boys really were clingy.

Blaine looked as if he was about to say something, brow furrowed and a slight frown on his lips, but then the opening notes of the Troubletones started, and everything else faded. 

They really were fucked for sectionals if they were competing against one another, because  _ holy shit _ these girls were insane. He wondered for the millionth time what he would have to do to get into this group, because they were simply perfection. How Berry had gotten every solo under the sun when those voices existed was beyond him, and he made a mental note to bully Schuester even more as reparations for neglecting these girls, as they were flawless. 

Santana was clearly not ok, not recovered from the traumatic events of the days prior, but every ounce of emotion was poured into the performance, and he had a strange feeling, something like pride? His anger at Hudson was overwhelming though, glaring a hole in the back of his large head as the girls sang, internally cussing him out for doing the worst thing he could have possibly done.

They finished, and he stood up to clap, clearly the only member of the New Directions to not be infused with jealousy as most of them gave a very weak round of applause. Before he even knew what was happening, Santana had jumped off the stage, storming towards Hudson, yelling about him saying something to Rachel.

Sebastian could sense this going south, so got out his seat to try and reach her, defend his friend.

“No you idiot, now everyone knows!” she choked out, voice laced with rage, and before he could get to her, the loud ‘crack’ of a slap echoed through the auditorium, as her hand made contact with his face. 

Finn deserved it, wholeheartedly, and part of him wanted to join in and slap the other side for good measure, but this was McKinley, and even though he’d done something so much worse to her, he knew this would all be pinned on Santana, so as he made his way round to her side, Sebastian grabbed her hand and pulled, taking her out of the theatre with him. 

They were near a door, so he pushed his way through and got them out, turning around to face her once they were clear of the auditorium. 

“Are you alright?” Sebastian asked, staring down at her face which was borderline trembling with rage.

“I’m fine, leave off it Mitt Romney.” Santana almost spat the words out, no venom in them just sounding weak as a tear slipped down her face. 

Sebastian sighed and ran a hand through his hair, torn between comforting her and chastising her for just attacking a student who although deserved it, would probably get off scot free. The slight tremble in her lip made him make his mind up though, and ignoring her protests he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pulling her to his chest and letting her cry on him.

“You sounded fucking amazing up there,” he murmured, trying not to think about how they were hugging for the second time in two days, when they were both supposed to be emotionally stunted. Down the corridor, there was the sound of feet, and he looked up to see Brittney and Blaine heading towards them, the blonde looking about a second away from bursting into tears herself. 

She reached them, and Sebastian wordlessly passed Santana off to her, and they walked away quickly, arms around each other and softly sobbing as they left. Blaine grabbed his arm as he went to leave, fingers tightly wrapped around his skin.

“Is she ok?” 

Sebastian paused, turning to look at Blaine’s face which was full of worry, and he almost stayed, almost gave into his touch, but the sound of the rest of the New Directions down the hallway made him recollect himself. As Schuester approached, clearly looking for Santana, Sebastian pushed Blaine’s hand off and walked away without looking back, preparing himself to go to Scandals, find a body and a drink to get lost in.

~

He didn’t know why everything with Santana had hit him so hard. 

Yeah, he guessed that a large part of it was that she was one of his closest friends, and he felt fucking awful for her and what she was going through. But for any gay kid, this was likely to bring up some shitty memories, even for someone like him who was so brazenly open and comfortable with his sexuality. 

Coming out the closest was always going to be something Sebastian was going to do, as he was too much of an asshole to stay in, and liked pissing his parents off too much to not want to see them squirm over his sexuality. But still, the constant looks, lack of affection, judgement simply over who he was, well that was enough to wear him down even though he didn’t crave his parents validation anymore. 

Drink and men seemed to be what he used to fill the void; when he was in France he turned a bit more to substances but was trying to wean off when he could nowadays, only 17 and not wanting to start aging too fast. Scandals was tired now, the same people, same atmosphere, but stuck out where he was, there wasn’t really any other choice. 

He had texted one of the Warblers, asked him to meet him there, and they lasted 20 minutes inside before they were fucking in the back seat of Sebastian’s car, parked in the forest somewhere. Honestly, he could barely remember his name, and he was deciededly less sexy out of uniform, but he was an easy lay and a member of the competition, which would certainly come in handy.

Unlike the rest of the New Directions, Sebastian would do anything to win - do anyone to win - and having a Warbler in his back pocket would be beneficial in more ways than just getting him off. 

He could hear Blaine’s voice in his head, probably telling him something like fucking or drinking your problems away won’t make them disappear, but advice from a boy with a boyfriend like that really didn’t do much for him. And Sebastian couldn’t think about Blaine, not too much. He made him confused, emotional, a flurry of feelings that he hated so much it hurt, but he didn’t want to think about any other reason it would hurt him.

~

Santana had texted him all the updates, including Finn lying on her behalf for some reason, avoiding getting suspended, and how she and the Troubletones had been summoned to the choir room by Hudson for...whatever reason.

Frankenteen had probably mentioned it at some point when he was too busy objectifying Blaine or imagining throwing rocks at Berry, but Sebastian had completely missed that announcement so was as clueless as she was when they arrived in their rehearsal. 

The reason, as it turned out, was ‘lady music week’. Sweet Jesus, and he didn’t think things could get worse. Oh wait, turns out everything could get worse as Blaine and Kurt stood up, preparing to sing a duet at Santana, who was sat between Brittney and Sebastian with a very unimpressed look. 

He was a simple guy, really. In life, one of the things he usually tended to enjoy without fail was Blaine Anderson performing, in both musical appreciation and physical. It turns out, there was an exception to this rule however, as he watched him and his boyfriend commit a hate crime in front of him.

“This is enough to put me back in the closet, how bout you?” Sebastian whispered to Santana under his breath which caused a small snort of laughter that she tried to cover up with her hand. 

“Shut it stringbean, don’t pretend like you’re not still hard in your expensive jeans over Anderson right now.”

He kicked her in the leg for that, as he had frankly never been  _ less _ turned on by Blaine - sure he was always a little bit turned on by him, but this was a new low. 

Somewhere after Kurt had started butchering the song, and Blaine started honest to god  _ rapping _ , and for some reason everyone seemed to be loving it, the whole thing ended, finally. 

The whole room turned to stare at Santana expectantly, and she and him shared a look of barely refrained disgust. 

“Thank you guys,” she said with a slight laugh, “and thank you Finn, especially.” That glint in her eye returned that Sebastian had learnt to love and fear. “You know with all the horrible crap I’ve been through in my life, now I get to add that.” 

~

Glee had ended pretty quickly after Santana’s dismissal - Sebastian barely holding back a laugh, only stopping himself to avoid Blaine getting annoyed at him. Luckily, Kurt had been pulled away to the principal's office for some reason afterwards so there was less chance of an increased uncomfortable situation. It was probably to do with student council, even though there’s no way Hummel would have won. He was there on polling day, and pretty much everyone - himself included - had voted for Brittney, so he really didn’t see any other outcome happening. 

Until of course, Blaine accidentally told him about the ballot stuffing.

He hadn’t really spoken to Blaine since the Troubletones’ performance, Sebastian wouldn’t say he’d been  _ avoiding _ the other boy persay, but he hadn’t been exactly looking for him. Being seen emotionally vulnerable wasn’t particularly something that he liked to share with people, and Sebastian knew Blaine had seen the look in his eye when he was hugging Santana and for some reason that freaked him out. Immature? Yes. Self-preservation? Yes.

It wasn’t until Blaine cornered him in the hallway, a panicked look in his eye that they actually spoke. 

“Do you know anything about the election? Like did you do anything?”

Sebastian blinked a few times, entirely confused by the question being asked at him.

“The student council election? Killer, you know I don’t give a shit about this school.”

Blaine looked at him curiously, biting his lip and playing with the hem of his jumper nervously. “Just, did you do anything, you know, to the ballots?” Political manipulation probably was something Sebastian would consider if he cared even a little bit - he would sabotage a different show choir for sure, but senior class president? It didn’t deserve his effort. 

“Why are you asking me this? Just curious to know if I’m an asshole in practice as well as in theory, cos this is sort of out of nowhere Anderson,” he said, eyes narrowing, not appreciating being accosted in the middle of the hallway. 

“Well someone stuffed the ballots so that Kurt won the election, but there were more ballots than students so it’s fake. And Kurt didn’t do it so…”

Sebastian could barely believe what he was hearing - he’d shown no interest in the election, hadn’t even really spoken to Blaine in a few days, and was now suspect number one in this bullshit case?

“You’ve got to be fucking with me here, why would I ever do that?” he hissed, slamming his locker door shut. “What would I ever gain out of that situation, huh?”

Blaine squared his shoulders a bit, looking him in the eye. “Well it’s no secret you don’t like Kurt so…”

“Ok sure, I don’t like your obnoxious boyfriend, but guess what - I like very few people in this school. Doesn’t mean I’m going to go out of my way to sabotage them for no reason!” Sebastian was pissed, but he was also frustratingly hurt. “Is that really all you think of me?”

“No, Seb, I…” Blaine paused and trailed off, looking as if trying to find the right words to say. He wouldn’t find them. “This could get him suspended, go on his permanent record, really ruin his future! So I just need to know if this was you or not.”

“It wasn’t me, and you know that Anderson. I mean it’s great to know that I’m the first guy you come to when you think someone’s done something to ruin someone’s life, so thanks for that.” He was shouting now, he knew, drawing attention from people in the hallways. Someone from his swim team gave him a funny look which meant he knew he’d be teased for ‘fighting with his boyfriend’ next training session.

Blaine scrunched up his nose in a way that Sebastian knew he was starting to angry as well, huffing out a little. “Well can you blame me? You’ve been nothing but horrible to Kurt since you arrived, for absolutely no reason!” Sebastian had several reasons. “And I’m still friends with the Warblers, Nick told me how you’ve been texting three of the guys and hooking up with two of them; James was too upset to go to the last rehearsal when you told him to fuck off!”

So what Blaine said about all the Warblers being complete and utter gossips was true then, that was great. 

“It’s not my fault if they get attached - I never promised any more than the backseat of a car so they shouldn’t cry about it when that’s what they’re given.” They were definitely drawing looks now, raised eyebrows and whispers from passers by, and it may not be quite as bad as Dalton’s, but the McKinley gossip mill would be all over this soon.

“Wow, good to know you have class Sebastian,” Blaine spat back as if he was personally offended by his promiscuity. “Next time, think about someone’s feelings why don’t you?”

“Why do you even  _ care _ Blaine? You’re just pissed because you’re not the one getting fucked by me.” 

Sebastian knew that was probably too far, too much for Blaine to stand there and take, even if it was partly true. He was confident enough to know when people found him attractive, and he was perceptive enough to notice Blaine’s eyes up and down his body, lingering looks and concealed blushes. The shorter boy probably didn’t even know he was doing it, but he was.

There was dead silence between them, and Sebastian honestly wasn’t sure if he was going to get punched or not, but either way he was done with this conversation, so he turned to walk away but not before he gave one last look over his shoulder. “I didn’t do anything to the ballot boxes Anderson, believe me or not I don’t give a shit. Just leave me alone.”

~

Finding Kurt was pretty easy, as Sebastian stumbled across him in the library, hunched over some books alone on the table. He wanted to make a joke about not knowing he could read, but figured this probably wasn’t the best time. 

“Hummel,” he announced as he sat on the chair opposite, ignoring the glare he got in return. 

“What do you want, Sebastian? I’m not in the mood for your preppy shit right now.” Kurt’s voice was tired, and contrary to popular belief Sebastian had the ability to feel empathy, so tried to lighten his tone a little. 

“Had an interesting chat with your boyfriend in the hallway, he filled me in on everything,” he drawled, legs extending out under the table. Kurt narrowed his eyes at him and set his pen down carefully. 

“What do you mean? He said that someone stuffed the ballots? He really shouldn’t be talking to you about that stuff,” Kurt sighed. 

“Well he didn’t say ‘someone’ stuffed the ballots, he accused  _ me _ of doing it, so I just wanted to clear up that’s not true.” It wasn’t exactly said nicely, or in any tone of appreciation or generosity, but frankly it was the best he was going to be able to do, as Hummel just rubbed him the wrong way. 

“Why would he think it was you? You don’t care about student politics…” Kurt blinked at him, and well that was a surprise, as Sebastian had always just assumed that it had been  _ his _ thought rather than Blaine’s, and Blaine had been sent to soften the blow. 

“I don’t know, he just accosted me in the hallway, said that I hate you, and then called me a slut. It was all very gay and dramatic, but I just thought you should know it wasn’t me.” This conversation was now fairly pointless, as Kurt didn’t even think it was him, so Sebastian got up to go. 

“Wait, Sebastian,” Kurt said, waving out an arm to stop him from going. “Thank you, for saying that. You didn’t have to, so…”

And he knew that was as painful for Kurt as it would’ve been for him, so he gave a slight nod. “For what it’s worth, Hummel, I know you wouldn’t do that, not your style. Maybe think about how it could have been someone trying to help you rather than hinder you,” he offered, and that was as nice as he’d ever be, so walked out of the library after that, trying not to think about how Blaine had accused him all on his own.

~

Luckily, some of his concerns about Santana were relieved when she announced in glee club she had come out to her parents, and they’d accepted her, which settled his stomach slightly - not that he’d ever tell her that. 

She was standing at the front after the performance, a smile on her face that had been missing for a while, and Sebastian came to the horrifying realisation that she was probably one of his best friends.

“So thank you, everyone, even though most of you are annoying and obnoxious, you’ve all helped me, and by extension Brittney, this past week, and even if I am a bit of a bitch i’m super grateful,” she said to the room, a small round of applause breaking out. Blaine was sat on the other side of the choir room, having stormed in earlier ignoring Sebastian thankfully, as he  _ really _ didn’t want to talk to him.

“And thank you to Smythe, as although you look like a bastard child of a republican senator, you’ve been genuinely, one of my best friends through this all, and I know how annoyed you’re going to be with me for letting people know you have feelings, but I don’t care.” She smiled sweetly at him, the bitch, as everyone turned to look at him with gratitude and affection, which was his worst nightmare. 

He flipped her off and sunk lower in his chair, avoiding eye contact with the people in the room as Santana didn’t lie when she said he would hate it for people to know he has a heart. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Blaine staring at him, no longer full of anger but something more unreadable, something if he was braver he would call wistful. He hated it.

Before Sebastian could dwell on Blaine’s face for too long, Kurt was at the front, congratulating Brittney on getting senior class president, and thankfully  _ he _ didn’t say any disgusting thank you’s directed at Sebastian because he genuinely didn’t think he could deal with anyone else thinking he was nice today. 

Everything was going sort of smoothly for once, even with both the Troubletones and the New Directions in the same room, Sebastian talking to Mike in the corner whilst vehemently ignoring Blaine on the other side. He hadn’t even noticed that Rachel had been missing until she walked in, head down and looking on the verge of tears, not spouting out narcissistic nonsense for once. 

And then she opened her mouth, and things got so much worse. 

~

Rachel Berry was really fucking annoying, but she was a great singer and demanding performer, and with their other vocal powerhouses gone, a lot of the competition was riding on her. 

And she had gotten herself suspended for two weeks, like a goddamn idiot, so now they were  _ two _ people short of competing, and only had two female voices on the team. Well, they had Hummel as well but Sebastian would much rather listen to Tina or Quinn, even if he did think Tina was going to hex him sometimes. 

He had to refrain very hard from shouting ‘I told you so’ at them all in the next glee rehearsal as they panicked over numbers and their absent set list, as if he hadn’t been reminding them about it all for weeks. Honestly, Sebastian wasn’t sure if he could last a whole other year of doing this without having some form of stroke.

“Look, you’ve always managed to compete before, is there anyone we could get back that’s left?” he asked, voice exhausted but trying to cut through everyone’s complaining. To his surprise, that actually seemed to mean something, as Finn sat straight up and looked as if he had a thought for once.

“That’s it - Sam! We need to get Sam Evans back!” 

He had no idea who this ‘Sam’ guy was, but judging from the room’s reaction it would be a pretty good move to get him; even Blaine seemed to agree and he had only moved to McKinley this year as well. 

“Ok, go get Sam then,” Sebastian said with a shrug, mentally ticking off one of the gaps they need to fill. “Where is he and why did he leave?”

“Kentucky, his family moved over summer as his dad got a new job...and that could be a problem actually,” Finn mused, scratching his head a little. “Even if he wanted to come back, his family wouldn’t, so he would need some place to stay.”

“Easy, he can stay with me. So how exactly are we going to get him then?”

There was an annoying silence, so Sebastian looked up, not expecting to see everyone staring at him with slightly confused expressions, mouths open and brows furrowed. “Is there a problem?” he drawled.

Tina narrowed her eyes and leaned against the piano on her elbows. “You just said he could stay with you, and you’ve never even met the guy. He is straight, by the way, so don’t think you could just be getting a live in fuckbuddy.”

So apparently all the New Directions think he’s a slut, fair enough.

“Well I offered because I have 5 spare bedrooms in my house and enough money for my parents to not even notice he’s there, but if one of you wants to take in an extra person be my guest, I was just trying to be proactive.” 

Mike gave him a smile, and a light pat on the shoulder. “That’s really nice of you Sebastian, cheers man.” Oh god, not all this ‘nice’ stuff again, he had a reputation to uphold dammit. 

“I’m just saying, if we need him I have the means to house him, it’s not as generous if you know the size of my house ok.” No one seemed to be relenting their expressions and continued smiling at him, but before he could open his mouth to try and keep bragging about how rich he was to get them all off his back Artie spoke over him.

“Ok, so we get Sam. We still need one more person, and they need to have some semblance of musical talent cos we don’t have time to teach some math geek the concept of rhythm.”

He had a point - Sebastian had debated trying to blackmail one of his jock friends, but they’d probably end up hindering rather than helping, and he also liked to keep his worlds separate. If someone from the swim, soccer, or basketball team found out he could sometimes have a heart, he’d never fucking hear the end of it. 

They all thought for a moment, and he let his eyes fall over the room, landing on where the band were packing up after their rehearsal. “Wait - music dorks, can any of you slightly sing or dance?” he called out, gesturing in their direction. All of them looked like deer in the headlights, very confused at being spoken to. 

Finn gave him an odd look, so Sebastian rolled his eyes and stood up. “These guys rehearse with us every day so they know all our material anyway, plus they have some musical talent at least so should be able to keep in time, probably better than you, Hudson.” He ignored his sputters of protest. “Bowl cut bassist or stickman drummer, which one of you can sing the best?”

“Uh, I can kind of sing?” the bassist said sheepishly, and that was enough for him.

“Perfect, be here next rehearsal in preparation to sing and dance and try to look less like Jackson from Hannah Montana when you show up, cos honestly it’s just distracting.” Sebastian dismissed him with a wave of his hand and turned back to the New Directions.

“There we go, thanks for your help everyone,” he said sarcastically, purposefully ignoring Blaine’s stare. “Hudson, you go and get this Sam guy then, bring him back as soon as you can.”

A general murmur of agreement went round at the conclusion of the meeting, everyone seemingly happy with the direction it had taken. Sebastian was still annoyed at Blaine, and Mike was clearly going through something with Tina so he had no reason to hang around in the choir room. He walked out, wanting to just get to class and then to swim practice without any annoyance or drama, but that clearly wasn’t in the cards for him.

A hand caught on his sleeve, Kurt at the end of the arm.

“Have you said anything to Blaine?”

Sebastian blinked, trying to figure out why the fuck Hummel was talking to him. “I’m sorry, your boyfriend hasn’t really been my go to priority since he publicly yelled at me for being a whore, which although is true, I didn’t like his tone.” He pushed off the offending hand on his arm and wiped at his sleeve with a scrunched nose.

Kurt rolled his eyes at him, looking annoyed. “He’s been in a bad mood, and won’t even hear the sound of your name without getting annoyed, and in turn has been pissed off at me.”

Well, their somewhat amicable relationship had only lasted a few days then, the way Kurt was glaring at him with steely eyes letting him now that neither of their attitudes had really changed. 

“Maybe it has nothing to do with me, maybe it has everything to do with me. Try talking to your boyfriend once in a while and actually listening to what he has to say rather than speaking to  _ me _ about your issues,” Sebastian clipped back, tired of this conversation. He was sick of being nice, and also sick of being spoken to as if everything bad that happened in this school was his fucking fault. 

“Rather than abandoning Blaine outside of a gay bar in the middle of the night try having an actual conversation with him, because I see the way he looks at me and you  _ should _ be worried.” 

He didn’t even believe in what he was saying, not really. Sebastian was a threat to most relationships, but he didn’t think he would separate this one. He just wanted to see Kurt squirm, and give Blaine a reason to be mad.

“Because the way it’s going, by the end of the year I’ll have Blaine and a nationals trophy, and you’ll have those khakis and a Lima Bean apron, and a face so gay it hurts me,” Sebastian continued, back straight so he was looking down at Kurt, speaking lazily, as if Hummel didn’t even deserve the effort he was going to to speak to him. 

The conversation was over, he could see Blaine approaching down the hall so he turned and left, borderline storming off the class. He hated that it wasn’t even true, that he  _ knew _ what he had just said had been blatant lies, trying to rile Kurt up, cause a problem. Everyone already seemed to blame him for everything, both members of that relationship apparently deeming him the cause of every single one of their issues, despite the fact he hadn’t even done anything. 

Sure, at first his plan was to just sweep in, take Blaine and kick Kurt to the side, not giving a fuck about feelings, and probably ditch the shorter boy after a few rounds. But then things got complicated, there was the glee club, and Blaine was different, made  _ him _ different, and the game was changed. But he had stayed away, to an extent - only verbally making advances and checking him out, but things way less serious than he would’ve done.

If just his presence in the school was enough to cause so many fractures in that perfect gay relationship, maybe it wasn’t as perfect as they liked to think it was. 

~

Sebastian had successfully managed to avoid any encounters with the glee club until their next rehearsal, sticking to having lunch with Santana and hanging out with his sports friends during the day. Some of them were actually mildly intelligent it turned out, even if they kept trying to make him wear his letterman jacket.

He and Santana were on their way to the choir room, running a little late to when Finn asked them to meet there, but neither one of them particularly cared enough. 

“What’s the deal with this Sam kid then? Everyone seemed pretty happy to have him back which is rare for those people to care about someone else.” 

Santana snorted at his comment, leading them down the hall. “He’s nice I guess. We dated for a bit last year, after he and Quinn had a disastrous little fling that was painfully aryan and ended with adultery like everything else in the damn club. Stood up for Hummel when he was being gay bashed so he could be worse,” she said, something bordering on affection in her tone. 

“Wait til you see his mouth though, that’s the most interesting thing about him.”

Sebastian tried not to think too hard about what that meant as they approached the choir room, mainly internally laughing at the concept of Santana dating a guy. As they walked in the back, it was clearly at the end of some impromptu performance, everyone holding red solo cups for some reason, a blond guy in the middle of the room with a guitar. 

He did have a pretty big mouth. 

Santana stepped forwards from being next to him, whipping a small book out of her pocket and advancing on Sam, who was smiling at the both of them, and Sebastian was very heavily reminded of a labrador. 

He could only stand and stifle laughter as Santana then rattled off a list of insults that made him  _ very _ proud of her, everyone in the room staring as she made comment after comment revolving around this guy’s mouth, which was going to have to try and make a mental note of as they were damn impressive. 

“I missed you too Santana,” Sam exclaimed with a grin, clearly unbothered by his greeting and stepped forwards to bring her into a hug, which he looked a lot happier about than she did. 

He pulled back, giving her a light smile as the rest of the room dispersed into smaller conversations, breaking into groups. Santana walked to go and talk to Quinn, whilst Sam came over to stop in front of Sebastian, hand extended. 

“You’re Sebastian right?” he asked as they shook hands. “Look, man, Finn told me about your offer to let me stay with you, that’s super generous dude I don’t know if I can accept.”

Sebastian waved him off as their hands separated, leaning against the piano. “Don’t worry about it, honestly I have the space and if we have even a single shot at winning sectionals we need everyone that we can, which apparently involves you Trouty. I know you’re crashing with Finn tonight but let me text you my address, we can get everything sorted and you can stay whenever.” 

He’d brought up Sam staying with them to his parents, angling it as a necessary action to help them win their competition, as if there was one thing his parents liked, it was winning. The fact that he was an all American football playing straight boy had definitely worked in his favour, and his mom had agreed they weren’t usually home enough for it to matter, and he could put as an act of charity on his college applications, which he had definitely already thought of. 

If they didn’t win sectionals, then the past few months of tormenting himself in glee club would have all been for nothing, so he was going to take any chance he could. 

Sam put his number in his phone, saying he only had a few bags of stuff anyway, and they agreed for him to move in the next day, so he could collect everything from the Hudson-Hummel house. The guy seemed alright, a little vacant and dopey maybe, but a lot better than most of the people in the room. If most of the other New Directions went to his house he would simply force his parents to move. 

The rehearsal ended pretty quickly, Schuester finalising their setlist with them all once any Troubletones members had left, and instructing Sebastian and Mike to lead the guys in choreography training tomorrow. The fact that they only had two girls in the group now was very upsetting, as the amount of fragile masculinity in the room was simply exhausting, him and Mike sharing a look of exasperation in anticipating the next day.

Sam asked if he wanted to go and get a coffee with him, get to know each other a little, which Sebastian really didn’t want to actually do, but figured if they were going to be sharing a house the least they could do was talk once in a while. They settled on shitty coffee from the canteen as Sebastian had seen Kurt and Blaine heading to the Lima Bean and he really did not want to deal with all that right now. 

Which must’ve been fairly obvious on his face as when they sat down outside, the first thing out of Sam’s abnormally large mouth was -

“So, you don’t like Kurt then huh?”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow as he took a sip, not expecting him to be so blunt. “I don’t really like anyone from the choir room, but Hummel is pretty high on the list, yeah.”

Sam nodded, biting the inside of his cheek a bit. “And Blaine is the exception to the rule then I guess, as you like him?”

“Jesus Evans what is this, 20 questions? We’re not prepubescent girls, we don’t need to sit around and talk about this shit,” Sebastian sighed as Sam raised his hands in apology.

“Sorry dude, just wanted to get all caught up on the group dynamics, things change around here pretty fast and you’re something new in the mix, so.” He gave a shrug and gave another one of those lopsided smiles. Sebastian could see why Santana would date this guy - he was cute and she would have eaten him up. 

“But how are you finding it? Like being in the glee club, McKinley, all of that?”

“It’s fine, I guess. Wasn’t my choice to be here, only joined glee cos I somewhat missed performing and there was a pretty face i wanted,” Sebastian admitted, even though everyone was already aware of his not so secret lust for-

“Blaine? I’m guessing that’s the pretty face,” Sam said with a chuckle. “Don’t really know the guy, he was a Warbler last year, only hung out with him at Rachel’s party and I do  _ not _ remember a lot of that night. Seems pretty talented though.”

Sebastian hummed, still not sure where he stood with Blaine. The guy had assumed he had sabotaged Kurt’s election, with no evidence or actual substance, and then had gotten all judgemental and weird about his sexual history for absolutely no reason. And it had hurt him, more than it should’ve really. Things like that never bothered him; he had thick skin and things like that were more often true than not, so why did it feel so bad when Blaine said it?

“Trouble in paradise then?” His facial journey over Blaine must’ve been pretty obvious from Sam’s question and raised eyebrows, staring at him expectantly. 

“He’s just...I don’t know. He hasn’t adjusted as well to McKinley really, still has issues with Hudson and some of the others about his role here, and I think it affects him more than he lets on. Things with Hummel aren’t great either I’m assuming, and both of them like to make me the scapegoat and blame me for any of their issues rather than just sorting it out, which is a pile of shit.” 

Sebastian didn’t really know why he was talking to this guy about all this, but something about that big dumb face put him at ease, and he was annoyingly easy to speak to, as well as look sympathetic but not condescending.

“That sucks man, hopefully after sectionals things will simmer down? Usually a lot of heat builds up around these competitions but when it’s over I reckon things will cool off, gotta have faith,” Sam offered plainly, taking sips of his drink and speaking as if it was the simplest thing in the world. 

“You really have the whole glass half full thing going, don’t you?” Sebastian was wary of having another optimistic person in his life, as frankly Blaine was enough, but Sam had this weird combination of frat boy and labrador energy that was oddly calming.

“Well, I’ve been homeless, and a stripper, and somehow things have sort of turned out alright, so I try and see the best in life I guess, if I don’t then it would be hard to keep going.”

It was pretty humbling, his frank talk of his life and his disadvantages, as whilst Sebastian faced a certain amount of issues with his past and his family, he knew he was privileged and wealthy, bordering on snobby sometimes, and there was Sam, a better person than him despite everything. He must’ve known his comment sobered the conversation a bit, as Sam just slapped the table and jumped up, tossing his empty cup in the bin as he stood.

“Let’s go to the gym or something, work out all our manly feelings and figure out how to get me onto a sports team, as I need a letterman.”

Sebastian groaned and got up as well, not admitting that working out actually sounded pretty good about now. “Take mine, it’s tacky and I hate it,” he muttered, laughing at Sam’s affronted gasp, punching him on the arm as they made their way to the locker room.

~

Dance rehearsals were going about as well as he thought they would. 

Sebastian was mainly the one in charge, as Mike explained to him he was going through some stuff with his dad so wasn’t in the perfect headspace, which he could empathise enough with to not be an asshole about it. Schuester wasn’t there as he wasn’t needed if Sebastian was taking control. Everyone was talking over each other, trying to put their own mediocre ideas in the foreground when it was supposed to be  _ Sebastian _ choreographing the routine, not every guy in glee club who for some reason thought they could dance. 

“Ok so 7 and 8,” Sebastian called out, clicking his fingers as a metronome and watching them all in varying degrees of success try and step in time. Blaine was perfect of course, most of them in a middle ground with those such as Puckerman just being completely useless. Even the bowlcut bassist - he refused to learn his name - was doing better than Finn and the Irish kid - who’s name he had completely forgotten.

“Dude this is fucking pointless, we’re not gonna win anyway, not without the girls,” Puck sighed, not even bothering to try anymore. “You’ve seen them right? We’re fucked.”

The guy may be a threat to general society but he had a point, and they all knew it. Sebastian had even told Santana that he would bet money on the Troubletones winning, as they were better dancers and vocalists, plus generally appealing to look at unlike most of the New Directions. 

She had laughed down the phone for 3 minutes straight when he told her they had the bassist performing with them.

“Well we have to figure out something that we can do that shows off our strengths, what makes us appealing then!” Finn said looking way too optimistic, despite the fact there was generally nothing appealing about this group of people.

“Yeah ok, like something a little boy band? Like this?”

Blaine did a little spin across the room, something Sebastian recognised as his go to move when he performed, which admittedly looked good when he did it, but it was more of a solo thing that the lugs of the room wouldn’t be able to grasp. A few of them started to emulate it, spinning around like idiots when he heard a groan from next to him. 

“Oh my god, stop, please stop,” Sam groaned, standing up from where he'd sat next to Sebastian. “Look, a little Warbler spin isn’t going to help us here ok?” The Warbler comment struck a nerve, he could tell, and Sebastian knew Sam had said it after their conversation the day before. “What we need to sell, is sex.”

He accented the word ‘sex’ with a body roll, hands dropping down his body with a roll of the waist. Sebastian could see the appeal. Blaine looked less than impressed though, throwing his hands up and scoffing, whilst Sam continued to body roll, the rest of the guys joining in.

Sebastian knew he had completely lost the attention of the room, all the boys now attempting Sam’s move with reckless abandon, whilst Blaine scowled off to the side for some reason. 

“That...is sex” Sam continued, rolling his hips aggressively in the middle of the room. He had a point, the only thing they had over the Troubletones were their male performers, and if they just put the attractive ones at the front, they had a chance of scoring some favours with any female judges. Blaine was staring over in annoyance, he gave Sebastian a stern look, tilting his head as if asking him to stop Sam, to which he just rolled his eyes and looked away.

He wasn’t his lap dog. 

“The man’s not wrong,” Artie chuckled with a point of the finger and a wink. Finn nodded next to him, giving Sam a pat on the shoulder.

“Yeah dude that’s awesome, just what we needed.”

There was a general murmur of consensus, and Sebastian was nothing if not democratic, so he moved down to stand among them with a smile at Sam. “Great, I’ll work that into the choreography, so if we take it from the top-”

“No, no, that’s not what we ‘need’” Blaine sighed, stepping forwards to look between Sam and Sebastian. “We don’t need to resort to that.” He pointed at their hips, nose scrunched up and looked annoyed at both of them.

Sam took a step closer, smile falling and replaced with a colder look. “What do you mean, ‘that’?”

“It’s cheap.” Blaine accented it with a point, eyes flickering between the two of them and jaw set. “It’s selling out.” And Sebastian knew this was directed at Sam, his idea of emphasising sex appeal, but he couldn’t help the twinge of hurt as Blaine glanced at him, memories of their previous conversation echoing. 

“Look, I came all this way back to win, so I think we should use our assets and do what we need to do, ok?” Sam said, giving another jerk of his hips. Sebastian nodded beside him, not just agreeing with what he was saying but also pissed off enough at Blaine to disagree with him anyway. 

“I agree with Evans, we have to play to our strengths. It’s not cheap, it’s effective, and those of us who possess sex appeal should show it off for our favour.” Sebastian glared at Blaine when he spoke, moving to stand shoulder to shoulder with Sam in solidarity.

“Right, and of course both of you would think that, you  _ have _ to think that in order to sleep at night” the shorter man scoffed, huffing out a breath and his words laced with coldness. Next to him, the blond tensed, moving closer to Blaine, shoulders squared. 

“And what the hell does that mean?” Sam’s words were barely audible, a mixture of hurt and furious, a tremble in his voice that came from rage.

Blaine laughed coldly, leaning in to point at both him and Sam. “It means that unlike the two of you, I’m not for sale.” 

Sam pushed at him before Sebastian could even register the words, Blaine swinging back with direct intent, only being stopped from punching Sam in the face by Finn holding him back. 

“What the fuck Anderson,” Sebastian hissed, moving forwards and grabbing him by the shirt, past Sam who was being held back by Puck. “Get off your fucking high horse and self righteous pedastal before I put you at the back of every number and start telling all your little secrets to everyone.”

Blaine leaned into his touch, shoving his sternum into Sebastian’s hand trying to wriggle out of Finn’s hold. “You have no authority to do any of that, you’re not in charge here.”

Sam was also struggling against Puck, his breathing heavy. “And you are? Don’t try and slutshame us just because you have no fucking sex appeal.” Blaine looked as if he was about to spit in their faces, almost shaking with anger as the rest of the room looked on in horror, Sebastian’s grip on his shirt even tighter as Mike tried to pry him off. 

“I’m pretty sure we all know Sebastian thinks I do,” Blaine hissed back, sneering at his face with an expression he’d never seen before. The room went silent at that, Sebastian taking a small step back as fuck, he didn’t think he’d go there.

“Watch your tone Anderson, you have no right to say that shit, stop acting like a prissy shit and pull yourself together,” he found himself saying, with less venom than he’d intended. He didn’t meet Kurt’s eyes.

“Fuck off and go back to Dalton.” Sam’s words were packed with more anger than his had done, a direct hit that was reflected by the pain in the shorter boy’s eyes.

“At least I didn’t sell my body, or fuck anyone who looks at me twice and then ditch them for another guy older than my dad!” Blaine yelled, finally fighting off Finn and breaking away, shoulders heaving. “Forget it,” he sighed coldly, shoving past Rory and storming out the room. 

Sebastian felt his whole body shake with anger, watching the figure leave the choir room with a slam of the door, feeling everyone’s gaze on him and Sam with a disgusting amount of sympathy. Mike looked as if he wanted to try and say something, but Sebastian waved him off, grabbing his bag off the floor and ignoring the guys trying to stop him. 

~

He’d gone out by his car to cool down, replaying Blaine’s words in his head as he took a long drag of a cigarette, something he was trying to cut back on. Sebastian knew he should probably talk to Sam, as the argument was probably more damaging for him, but he just needed a moment to collect himself.

Blaine had been on edge all day, and he knew that outburst was an accumulation of a bunch of shit weighing down on him, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. He could deal with comments like that from anyone else, but from someone who he thought had cared? It cut him deeper than he thought. 

Sebastian had known that Blaine was aware he was into him, but to be called out like that was pretty shocking, as if he was mocking his feelings or something, taking advantage of whatever he felt. And he didn’t even know what he felt, it was just...Blaine. 

He took a last drag, and then stubbed the cigarette under his heel, staring back at the school. Sam wasn’t done for another hour or so, and they were driving to Sebastian’s house for the first time today so he had to wait for him anyway. He thought for a second, before pushing off his car and starting for the building, with a pretty strong feeling where Blaine would be. A few weeks ago he had told him that when he was particularly stressed or angry, he would box to try and dissipate some of his rage in a healthy way, so Sebastian wasn’t surprised when he heard the sound of gloves on a boxing bag when he approached the gym.

Blaine may be acting like a little shit today, but he was still hot, Sebastian would give him that. His curls were slowly being undone from the gel and loosely stuck to his forehead, which was shining with sweat, just like his chest and arms exposed from his tank top. The smacking sounds of gloves against bag filled the air, the harsh noises accompanied by his heavy breathing as Blaine was glaring forwards. 

“That my face on there or Sam’s?”

His voice cut through the gym, making Blaine’s fists pause, head turning to look at him. There was an immediate flash of guilt in his eyes, hidden beneath the anger that encompassed his face. 

“Both. Finn as well.” He started hitting the bag again, small grunts accompanying each punch. Sebastian would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little turned on.

“Interesting, so were you planning on disgracing Hudson in front of the glee club as well or…?” He trailed off with a shrug, watching Blaine’s shoulders deflate and his fists lower, head falling against the bag.

“Sebastian...I…”

“-Because the way I see it, Finn has been a bit of an asshole to you, so maybe you chewing him out would make sense. But Evan’s came back all the way from Kentucky for this, and just because you don’t like his ideas doesn’t mean you should talk to him like that. And where the  _ fuck _ did I fit in because that wasn’t even about me.” His voice got progressively louder as he continued, walking closer to the boxing bag until he was only a few inches away from the other boy. 

“I know. And I’m sorry, I was completely out of order. I just...Sam’s comments about the Warblers and Dalton kind of struck a nerve and I lashed out which was fucked up, I know. I didn’t mean to bring you into it, I  _ shouldn’t _ have brought you into it, but you immediately went to defend Sam and you’ve only known him a day and… I guess I just had gotten used to you always being on my side.”

Sebastian narrowed his eyes at Blaine, who’s forehead was resting against the bag and breathing heavily, eyes closed. “You told everyone I wanted you and that I’d fuck anyone that looked at me ... because I didn’t take your side?”

“What? No, I didn’t mean…” Blaine stood up and ripped off his boxing gloves, running a free hand through his curls which were now completely free. “I still feel like I don’t belong here, and Finn is still riding me so hard, and you were always the person who had my back, and in the moment I freaked out, thought you were replacing me with Sam or whatever, I know it’s stupid.” He connected their eyes, his damp with more than just sweat. 

“God Seb I’m so sorry, for this, for accusing you of ruining Kurt’s ballots, for everything. You just make me so fucking confused and I don’t know what to do ok? Maybe a stupid part of me thought that you weren’t sleep with anyone anymore, not after we went to Scandals or whatever.”

“Why? What does that even mean Blaine?” Sebastian almost shouted, completely taken aback by that, head spinning. “You have a boyfriend for fucks sake! You were told you have no goddamn sex appeal and you didn’t say Kurt’s name but you said  _ mine _ , and now you’re saying you’re upset I sleep with other people? Do you not see how fucking confusing that is?”

His mind was reeling, staring down at Blaine with a desperation in his voice that Sebastian didn’t often have, trying to make sense of this conversation. The shorter boy was now avoiding his eyes completely, squeezing them shut with one arm around himself, looking a lot smaller than before. 

“Because you make me feel wanted, and I hate that I like it. I like being wanted by you, but then I started to like it too much, and you started being nice, and kind, and helping people and it all went to shit. I hate that I hate the idea of you with anyone else,” Blaine whispered, biting on his lower lip. 

Sebastian shook his head lightly, hearing the defeat and guilt laced in Blaine’s words. “That’s not fair, on either one of us B.” He stepped closer so they were almost touching, feeling the heat radiate off of his exposed skin. “You can’t be with Hummel and then not want me being with anyone else, that’s not a choice you get to make.”

Blaine nodded at that, shakily letting out a deep sigh. “I know, and I know I need to talk to Finn, explain my anger, and apologise to Sam, cos I was out of order. I’m just confused, ok and sectionals and glee club and everything is just making it all worse, but I am sorry Seb, I promise. Can you let me try and make it up to you?”

He wanted to scoff in Blaine’s face, tell him to fuck off and just walk out, but he knew he wasn’t that strong, that for some reason he’d never be able to walk away from him. And maybe that was the whole problem. 

“Yeah, ok. Just, make sure you speak to Evans, we don’t need any more inter-club fighting going on.” Sebastian didn’t want to say any more, before he said something dumb and made it all worse, but the sight of Blaine’s trembling lip and watery eyes was enough to make his knees weak. 

“Hey B, it’s alright,” he sighed, stepping closer and wrapping his fingers around Blaine’s wrist. “Don’t you think I’ve said some fucked up stuff when I’m angry? I’ve got thicker skin than that, and we’re friends, it’s ok. Sam will be alright too, he seems the forgiving type so it’s gonna work out.” 

Sebastian rubbed circles soothingly on Blaine’s skin, aware it was pretty fucked up he was doing the one comforting, but the shorter boy seemed so broken down and exhausted it was hard not to feel a little bad. “We’re ok, I promise. Next rehearsal it’ll be like nothing happened, me and you can go back to being annoyed by no one taking things seriously and knowing we’re superior, yeah?”

Blaine looked up through his lashes with a grateful smile, a look that made Sebastian want to grab and kiss him right there, a look that was damn inappropriate after what they’d spoken about. 

He dropped his hand and gave a slight cough, not ready for that just yet. Give him a week and he would say a flirty comment or cup his face, but not now. “Alright, I need to find Sam, we’re going back to mine, so…”

Sebastian gave him a smile, backing away from Blaine and the punching bag and turning to leave, almost bumping into Finn on the way out, who was obviously heading to see Blaine as well. He muttered a greeting in passing but continued down the hall, just wanting to sit in his car and wait for Sam so they could get the fuck out of here.

~

The drive back to his house had been surprisingly not uncomfortable, Sebastian recounting some of his conversation with Blaine - omitting certain things - and Sam again proving himself to be an annoyingly nice person, by not even being that angry and explaining that both of them said hurtful things, and that tensions were high. Sebastian would most certainly not have been that fucking calm if the situations were reversed, but didn’t push it, happy that at least things had the potential to get better.

Unsurprisingly, his parents hadn’t been home, so he had shown Sam to the room next to his and they ordered food, spending the evening together just chatting and unpacking for a while, the feeling of someone in his house with him kind of strange for Sebastian. 

At one point, Blaine had called Sam - presumably getting his number from Kurt - and they’d had a fairly long phone conversation which seemed to be pretty beneficial, Sebastian just texting Santana the entire time and keeping her up to date, omitting any competition details of course. 

He was pretty optimistic about their whole living situation, as Sam seemed easy going and calm, and when his parents got home and he introduced himself, his mom and dad actually seemed to not hate him, which was an added bonus. Sebastian couldn’t help but feel hurt slightly, knowing that Sam was like the son they had wanted, but he wouldn’t pin that on the blond, not after he’d been so kind. Plus, he had offered to help him get back in the house late at night if he went out drinking, so it really was a win.

The first rehearsal back post Blaine’s somewhat meltdown went about as well as it could, those involved in the argument clearly having made peace and most the tensions dissolved; Finn and Blaine had worked out their differences and Sebastian kept true to his word by acting like it never happened. Whatever Sam and Blaine had said to one another seemed to have worked as well, the two of them no longer hurling insults.

Sebastian didn’t just act like it never happened; he tried to think it too. 

The locker room conversation between himself and Blaine was more than confusing, the shorter boy somewhat admitting there were some amount of feelings, something more than platonic there, but here they were in rehearsals and Kurt and Blaine looked as in love as ever. He knew he’d fucked up, gotten involved in a situation too far and now found himself hurting, and emoting, two things he would really rather not to. 

But there was a competition to be done, a competition to  _ win _ , so instead Sebastian threw himself into rehearsals and training, attempting to whip the sorry lot into the best shape they could manage. For most of them that shape was ‘out of’.

Sectionals arrived quickly, creeping up on him as he’d buried his head into the preparations. Luckily it was held at McKinley so it was hometurf for both them and the Troubletones, and although they’d sharpened their choreography and perfected the vocals, Sebastian wasn’t as confident in a victory as he wanted to be - the girls were good. 

They had a Jackson 5 set that was ok, probably the best they were going to do, and he at least had some solos so they had some taste at least. Even if he had to sing in some shitty boy band alongside Blaine, Sam, Artie and Finn, it was something, and he and Mike had worked on enough featured dancing to give them some way of standing out. 

Sebastian didn’t really  _ do _ nerves. Especially not for some shitty show choir thing, full of insufferable people and low stakes, but there was some weird feeling in his stomach as he and Sam drove over to McKinley for the competition. 

“You think we’re going to win?”

“Evans, you’re delightfully optimistic, but even you gotta see that our odds are fucking low,” he snorted with a hand on the wheel, hearing Sam’s contemplative hum beside him. “Look, we have talented people, I mean we have  _ me _ for fucks sake, but we’re not as much of a unit as we should be. Thank christ we got you here or else I would say our odds are just non existent.” 

Sam lightly nudged his upper arm with his fist, and Sebastian didn’t need to look at him to know he had a big dumb grin on his face. “Dude that was pretty much a compliment. Wasn’t aware you gave those out to anyone but Blaine.” He really had to stop opening his mouth and not being a bitch. 

“Speaking of, you spoken to him recently? Noticed the two of you lowkey blanking one another in rehearsals, despite the fact you’re complaining about us not being a unit,” Sam continued, eyebrows raised, tone accosting but in a ‘friendly’ way. Sebastian guessed they were friends now, if they had to be, seeing as they did live in the same house. 

“When I point out the flaws of others that never has anything to do with me, actually-”

“-Don’t be a dick you know what I mean, it’s weird vibes for the group-”

“-Seeing as we’re the most talented people there it simply doesn’t matter-”

“-Sebastian, shut up,” Sam exhaled, cutting him off with a gesture. “Look dude I know we only  _ met _ last week, but we sleep like a few meters away from each other and eat breakfast together every morning so I feel I got a pretty good grip of you, especially seeing as I’m the only person at the school who knows anything about your home life.”

He felt his hands grip on the wheel slightly, hating the fact that  _ anyone _ knew anything like that about him, something so vulnerable. Weak. Sam didn’t mean anything bad by it - his parents weren’t abusive for fucks sake, but their general coldness and lack of attachment was clear as day, and whilst he and the blond didn’t discuss it frankly, there was an unspoken acknowledgement of it. 

“I just mean,” Sam continued with a sigh, “you’re a good guy, and clearly something went on with Blaine, and I’m not saying you  _ have _ to, but if you do ever wanna talk about it, well I’m here for you bro. No judgement.”

“Don’t think I could deal with judgement from a seventeen year old stripper,” Sebastian snorted, earning him a light smack on the arm. There was no bite, and Sam knew that he was in no place to critique so a comfortable silence fell as he pulled into the McKinley parking lot, starting to fill up with performers' cars. 

As the engine was cut off and Sam moved to undo his seatbelt, Sebastian cleared his throat a little and turned to face him, experiencing those same irritating emotions again. “Thanks, Evans. For you know, not being a dick.”

Maybe not a deep declaration of love and affection, but for someone as emotionally stunted as Sebastian, well, it was the best anyone was gonna get. Clearly Sam got that, as he just grinned and extended a fist, over the moon about not being a dick for some reason. 

“Cheers bro, let’s go win this thing.”

God he was cheesy. 

~

Somehow they won. 

Emphasis on the somehow, because sure, they managed to do everything correctly and not fuck up, and undoubtedly gave a good show, but the Troubletones were  _ good _ . Watching them Sebastian had been cheering on absurdly loud and drawing a few annoyed looks, but as soon as those girls switched to ‘Survivor’ and started dancing, it would be a crime to not stand up and yell. 

However, they won first place. As the trophy was handed over to them, lifted over their heads with cries of elation and obnoxiously loud shouting, Sebastian couldn’t help but stare at Blaine, wondering what it would be like if he could grab and hug him there, rather than Kurt. 

He had clearly been the stand out performer of the New Directions, commanding two of their numbers fully with an absurdly big stage presence for such a small man, and vocals to kill for. Sebastian nearly fucking missed a step staring, admiring the way he spun and twirled, filling out the shoulders of the blazer so deliciously with hair starting to free from the gel and plaster to his forehead. 

Under the lights, belting out to a crowd who adored him, Blaine had never seemed more perfect, and he wasn’t even sure how to tell him that.

Sebastian had of course been flawless as well, dancing his way through the songs with ease, taking center stage when he needed to and stepping back as well, able to hear Santana’s cheer in particular when they ended. He felt bad for the girls, knowing they deserved to move forward just as much as they did - but perhaps even more so, after all the shit they’d been put through being shoved to the back of the room. 

But winning was the most important thing, as it always was. Feelings weren’t going to start getting in the way of that now. 

Afterwards, he had expected some sort of afterparty, some level of celebration which would hopefully involve alcohol - and a lot of it - but apparently McKinley just sucked on all levels as there was nothing of the sort. Sebastian just found himself out by his car, waiting for Sam to stop flirting with Mercedes so they could drive home, but his peace was disrupted by a small cough to the side. 

“Uh, good job today.”

He looked to see Blaine stood there, changed out his performance wear and in softer, more casual clothing, staring at him as if trying to be nonchalant and confident, but the waves of anxiety rolling off him were almost smacking him in the face. Frustratingly, it was adorable, hair fluffy from the exertion of the night and hands wrapped in a sweater, and Sebastian hated it. 

“Back at you killer, pretty sure you’re the thing that made us win, so,” he replied with a shrug, pulling off the uncaring act a lot better than Blaine did. The shorter boy was as humble as ever, waving him off with a shake of the head, but his grateful smile was unavoidable. 

“I know I’ve said it before, but I haven’t said it enough - I really am glad you joined glee club Sebastian,” Blaine announced softly. He leant against the car next to him, shoulder not reaching Sebastian’s but their arms almost touching, heat evident in the cool evening air. “Yeah, you’ve made some things slightly more difficult-”

“-Understatement of the year-”

“-But,” Blaine interrupted with a frown, “You’ve made being in the New Directions so much better, someone I feel I can talk to, relate to. Not just someone who’s Kurt’s friend, but someone who’s mine.”

He ignored the way his toes curled at being called Blaine’s, knowing that’s not how he meant it, but unable to stop his mind from receiving it as if it was.

“Well don’t worry about that, I’m never going to be Hummel’s friend.” Sebastian felt the shoulder next to him nudge into his side, and allowed himself a chuckle. He wasn’t in the mood for some deep, emotional shit right now, exhausted after the day and wanting to go and pretend to not want to play video games with Sam, but he also wasn’t in the mood to ruin Blaine’s evening. 

Across the parking lot he saw a figure start to head their direction and recognised the blond hair, so stepped away from Blaine and cleared his throat, hands straightening out his shirt. “I was serious though Anderson, we won tonight because of you, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” He hated the way Blaine’s eyes softened and lips parted, because that shouldn’t have been news to him, it should’ve been plastered everywhere. “Goodnight B,” he added softly, offering a small smile before moving to get into his car, slipping into the driver's seat in silence. 

Not long after Sam crashed his way in far less elegantly, slamming the door shut behind him with a wide smile. “Hey man, everything ok with Blaine”?

Sebastian gave a curt nod and started the engine, staring straight ahead. Eyes focused. Not thinking. 

“Everything’s great, just the way they should be.”

If Sam noticed the bitterness in his tone, the way his shoulders tensed and jaw clenched, he didn’t say anything. He launched into talking about some dumb Star Wars theory instead, talking his ear off all the way home until Sebastian had almost forgotten about Blaine, and the way his heart hurt when they spoke. Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you SM for reading!!!! im killer-leo on tumblr <3


	4. it's like i'm wasting your honour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly i didn’t feel like covering the christmas ep - i hate writing xmas when its not xmas, and the thing is this is slow burn enough and from the way i’ve planned it, i cant drag out the pre-seblaine for ridiculously long as would just get tedious :/ covering 3x11 was hard cos like, sebastian being a warbler is kinda the whole plot of the ep so i tried to make do?? idk. im not a huge fan of this but WE MOVE LETS GO. shoutout to quinn and ella for beta reading ily queens <3
> 
> also i feel like i should mention that im not rewatching any of the actual show … like ive been watching it since i was about 13 so i know it inside out but i havent been watching episodes and have been using just my memory so im sorry if i miss anything out etc!! i refuse to rewatch it <3 no dedication   
> this covers 3x09 (technically), 3x10, and 3x11!!   
> Also ella says listen to sharing you by lany or perish :/

Just days after their win at sectionals, the New Directions found themselves reabsorbing the Trouble Tones back into their ranks. Well, the ones of importance it seemed anyway. 

Sebastian damn near teared up at the revelation when Santana had texted him to reveal the deal Quinn had somehow got them, where they were assured one number per competition. Really, it was insulting that they had to be set aside one number and Berry was guaranteed a dull ballad no matter what, but still; they were back. 

Sitting in the choir room surrounded by the insufferable lot of them was now slightly improved by having Santana next to him again, throwing wadded up bits of paper at Hummel and Berry when Schuester wasn’t looking, and then inconspicuously pointing at Puck when they turned. It was the little things really. 

“So Evans said you’re fucking off to France next week.”

Sebastian was torn away from staring at the back of Blaine’s head by Santana’s question, cutting through the sounds of the courtyard. They were sat on a table in the corner, just the two of them as they had a free period together, although just a few tables away from where Blaine and Tina were chatting away. 

“Evans would be correct, just visiting some family before Christmas,” he replied lazily, leaning back with his elbow propped up on the bench. “Missing a week of school, but seeing as I don’t actually learn anything here except advice on how to go to an early grave, it’s not too big of a deal.” It also helped that his parents had donated a fair amount of money to go towards new computers, so Figgins didn’t actually give a shit if he ever turned up.

Santana just hummed a little, one strand of her ponytail curled around a finger as she flickered her gaze between his face and where he’d been staring before. “You better bring me back something nice and expensive, otherwise there’s literally no point in being friends with you.”

He scoffed and kicked her under the table; “your dads a doctor, buy your own expensive gifts.” They both knew he’d get her something. “And you’re friends with me for my dazzling personality, effortless charm, and outstanding good looks actually, so pipe down.”

“Your entire personality is just being mean, gay, rich, and disgustingly in love with Blaine  _ actually _ -”

“-I am not in  _ love _ with him Lopez shut the fuck up-”

“-Oh please,” she groaned with a smack to his arm and roll of her eyes, “You can’t even go two minutes without staring at him with a stupid expression, it’s  _ exhuasting _ to look at, and you haven’t even spoken to him in a week which is obvious from the desperation that is practically leaking out of you.”

Scrunching his nose up at that disgusting and completely incorrect description, Sebastian gave a firm shake of his head and decidedly did not glance over at Blaine again, where the shorter boy was definitely not laughing with Tina with bright eyes and a wide grin. “I stare at his ass, sure, doesn’t mean I’m about to get down on one knee. And I’m just still pissed at him after the whole slut attack in rehearsal ok?”

Clearly, she didn’t believe him.

“I don’t believe you, I know you’re not mad at him for that cos you’re not angry, just all sad and mopey. Honestly Smythe it’s a bit pathetic, and not a good look on you.” 

And Sebastian didn’t know what to say. Santana was staring at him expectantly with a singularly raised eyebrow, leg up on the metal bench on the table which was effectively acting as a barrier for him making a run for it. The truth was he wasn’t mad at Blaine for their argument, he’d gotten over that fairly quickly after it happened - it was what they spoke about in the locker room that had crawled under his skin and not seemed to have gotten out. 

“When we were in the gym, talking, he basically said that he liked the way that I made him feel wanted, and got jealous of me being with other people,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. The words seemed ridiculous to be spoken out loud. “I don’t think even  _ he _ knew what he meant, only that he didn’t like the way I kept defending Sam, and that he was annoyed at himself for liking how I liked him.”

Santana let out a low whistle, giving a slow nod in somewhat surprised acknowledgement. “Fuck, didn’t know the hobbit had it in him. That’s kinda messed up seeing as he’s the one in a relationship?”

“Right?” Sebastian exclaimed, leaning in closer. “I mean he said how he agreed it was fucked up and apologized, but still. I just … I don’t know. Something’s gone wrong with me, cos for some reason I don’t want him to be upset, so I’m not even going to act on it, which is stupid.” Even just a month or so ago, Sebastian would’ve taken that as a sign to flirt incessantly and let Blaine fall into his arms, and into his bed. He would’ve given lingering touches, roaming eyes, daring texts.

Now, he just didn’t want to break Blaine’s heart. Which was kinda hurting his own. 

“Shit you’ve got it bad - you’re not even going to tell Hummel? Wouldn’t you love to just rub that in his face?” Santana had something crossed between bemusement and sympathy on her face, so he must look truly pathetic right about now. 

“I mean that would probably be the highlight of my life in the moment, but then Blaine would get mad and probably never speak to me again, and although I’m slightly ignoring him at the moment I don’t actually want that to last forever,” he sighed. Truthfully, he actually enjoyed being friends with Blaine, and would take that over nothing no matter how pitiful it sounded. 

McKinley really had made him insufferable. This wouldn’t have happened at Dalton. 

“God that’s lame,” Santana moaned, kicking her legs off the bench. “I’ve got Britt to make out with so I’ll see you later, but you better come back from Paris as interesting as you were when we first met cos you’re getting a bit sad.” 

“Fuck  _ off _ no I’m not-”

“-Later twink,” she called out already stood up, tossing him a wink before staring over at Blaine and Tina and giving a sarcastic little wave in their direction as they looked. “Sebastian says hi guys!”

He hated her. 

~

Going to Paris for two weeks was both just what he needed and not what he wanted. Getting away from Ohio and the clusterfuck surrounding his life there was honestly therapeutic to an extent, a way to have some peace and quiet away from insufferable theatre kids and futile classes, as well as annoying  _ feelings _ he had going on. 

Unfortunately, he found himself somewhat missing some of it, which was probably a sign he’d finally contracted some form of disease from the place. It was also pretty strange not living with Sam after the few weeks they’d had together, knowing the blond was staying at the Hudson-Hummels and not running into him every time he tried to go for a piss. Not seeing Santana every day, or talking to Mike between classes, even chatting with Mercedes and Quinn in the corridors. 

And yeah, sure, Blaine.

They’d shared the occasional message, a few sarcastic texts back and forth which were completely friendly but maybe slightly more restrained than they had once been, Sebastian sending some photos of the scenery and updating him on new insults he’d thought of for Rachel - calcium deficient Frodo was his favourite. 

Everything seemed to make him think of him; seeing pastries in bakeries which he knew Blaine would like, songs on the radio which would sound so much better sung by Blaine, obnoxious clothing stores with stupid outfits which only Blaine would be able to pull off. It was ridiculous. 

The only good thing was the lax European laws which meant if he wanted to go out and get shitfaced, well the government couldn’t stop him. His parents were out visiting family most of the time, and apart from the occasional visit to his grandmere, he didn’t have many obligations. Sebastian liked his extended family well enough, although a little snobby and obnoxious, but they also weren’t particularly affectionate or needy so long emotional conversations and catch ups weren't in order.

Sam, Santana, and Blaine updated him on what went on whilst he was aware, including some rather bizarre clips of Finn and Puck as not-Star Wars characters and Mike dressed as Santa. Honestly he was glad he wasn’t there. 

Coming back to America, Sebastian found himself with a slightly clearer mind and relaxed sense of self, having taken the time away to compose himself of emotions and frustrations, work out his shit. He mainly kept himself busy with warm bodies and cold liqueur, but it did the trick. Losing his head over Blaine wasn’t worth it, he didn’t need it. 

Sure, he liked the guy, a lot more than he should. But no, it wouldn’t be for the best, would just fuck things up for everyone. He’d gotten too attached, but Sebastian wasn’t capable of anything more than something physical, not able to give him any more than that. Even if Hummel wasn’t in the picture, he just wasn’t a relationship guy, and would just set him and Blaine up for failure.

The best thing to do would be to just, stop. Be friends, go back to normal, pull himself together. He’d allow himself to keep checking him out, of course - he hadn’t lost his mind, but had to stop before anything went further, and he did something he couldn’t take back and fuck them both over in the process. 

~

One of the best things about being back was seeing Sam, even if he would never admit it. The blond had sort of grown on him, like a dog, or tumour, and having him back in the house after he returned from Kentucky was frustratingly nice. Sebastian prided himself on being snarky and sarcastic, and fairly emotionally shut off, but Sam didn’t seem to care about that, and he found himself allowing him in.

Arriving at school together, the main thing the blond had been chatting about was his summer ‘fling’ with Mercedes, a stupid lovesick look in his eye and dreamy expression as they walked outside, frankly exhausting to look at. 

The rest of the glee club guys were sitting around some bleachers, absentmindedly chatting away as Sam almost drifted over to them with his mind occupied with a certain someone. 

“She’s special, Seb, and I loved every second of being with her - and you know what?” he said, with a point to his chest. 

“What.” Sebastian replied with a loud sigh, having learnt by now that Sam was just going to keep on going whenever. 

“I  _ know _ she feels the same, I can just sense the energy bro, we’re meant to be.”

As they arrived to be with the other guys, some of their heads turned and ears perked up, Mike asking, “You talking about Mercedes again, Sam?”

The tired look in Sebastian’s eyes conveyed enough. 

He flopped down next to Blaine, wordlessly passing Sam off to Finn and Puck so they could try and offer the advice to not flirt with Mercedes in front of her  _ tank _ of a boyfriend, leaning his head against the metal of the bleachers. 

“You’re getting on well with Sam then? Everything still ok at the house?” Blaine’s voice made him turn his head, facing the shorter boy with his elbows propping him up. In the few days they’d all been back at McKinley they’d spoken intermittently, both seeming to have the same idea of wordlessly slotting back into the place they’d been months ago. 

“I still maintain that I hate all of you, but admittedly Evans has grown on me, even if he has a tendency to eat the majority of the food at home,” he replied with a small shrug, his fondness for Sam not the well best secret. “I think my parents think he’s a good influence on me as well so they’re on my back less, when they’re there that is.”

Blaine hummed a little, small smile on his lips that let Sebastian know he was happy for him, but not going to push the topic of family. He appreciated that. 

“Mercedes still a main topic of conversation?”

“Fucking hell you can say that again,” he snorted, “the man’s obsessed, every drive to school is about how soft her skin is or how pretty her smile is it’s genuinely  _ nauseating _ . He’s got good taste I’ll give him that, but her boyfriend could also literally tear him in half so it doesn’t matter.”

Next to him Blaine shuffled a bit so his legs were crossed, now more directly facing at him. Behind them the Irish kid was speaking to Sam about something or other, not that Sebastian could understand a single fucking word of it. 

“Don’t you think it’s a bit romantic? It’s not like he’s being creepy or anything, he isn’t  _ forcing _ anything on her or making her uncomfortable, just upfront and confident about his feelings, and just trying to show her how special she is?” Of course Blaine ‘Valentine’s Day is my favourite holiday’ Anderson would find it romantic, but his priorities were way out of whack. 

“It’s gonna get him his ass kicked, and for what? Evans could go after pretty much any girl in this school so why put in all that effort, to then be stuck in a relationship of all things, sounds like a living hell,” Sebastian found himself saying with a roll of the eyes. He was planning on sugar coating it a little, but why not just say what he meant?

Blaine scrunched his nose up in that annoyingly adorable way of his, and gave him a look which he seemed to do a lot, one of mild frustration and confusion. Before he could say anything further both of them found themselves being dragged up by the others and then Sam started singing, right in the middle of school. 

McKinley had definitely cursed him somehow, because Sebastian ended up joining in. 

  
  


~

“You’re not seriously suggesting we help our teacher propose with a Maroon 5 song are you? Actually scratch that, let’s go back to the whole helping our teacher propose thing in the first place.”

Sebastian had been back at McKinley five fucking minutes before Schuester decided to ask his class of teenagers to help him propose to their guidance counsellor, because of course. If that wasn’t fucking awful enough, they were now working in some weird boys versus girls display as if to come up with the most gender stereotyped versions of proposing possible, and it seemed none of the boys had any brain cells. 

Artie rolled his eyes at him and tutted, as if Sebastian was the dumb one here. “It’s about sex, passion,  _ lust _ \- creating a performance she just can’t turn down?”

“It’s a proposal not a strip show, there should be some fucking romance in there, something  _ special _ . And again, you do realise this is our  _ teacher _ we’re talking about right? ” he replied slowly, getting mostly blank stares. Honestly he didn’t know why he tried. 

“Thought you’d be all down for something sexy Smythe, seems right up your street. You’re not exactly the romantic type are you bro?” Puck was as eloquent as ever, leaning back on a chair in the choir room as they all sat around. Sebastian wondered if he would ever graduate. Or achieve anything.

“Just because I may not ever want to get down on one knee in my own life doesn’t mean I don’t possess even the slightest medium of empathy or social awareness Puckerman, it’s called critical thinking you _degenerative-_ ”

“-What I think Sebastian is trying to say,” Mike cut in quickly, “is that whilst that may be good for a seduction, maybe not a proposal?” It was a lot nicer than the direction he was going in, but essentially the gist of it, Mike giving him a nod across the room and an amused look. 

The rest of the guys continued their conversation to varying degrees of success, Sebastian cutting in a few more times but after his third attempt realised that actually, he didn't give a shit, so gave up and let them come to whatever shitty decision they wanted to. 

After half an hour of meaningless chatter Artie apparently decided that his idea was clearly the best one, so they all got up to start making their way out and get to class. Before Sebastian could leg it out of there in an attempt to regrow some brain cells, a hand tapped on his arm awkwardly, stopping him from leaving. 

“Uh, hey Sebastian, I was just, uh, wondering if you had a sec?”

He didn't think that he and Finn had ever actually had a one on one conversation before, apart from arguments in the choir room or passive aggressive comments, so this new turn of events was somewhat surprising. Finn had his hands shoved in his pockets and shoulders hunched slightly, looking as uncomfortable as they both felt as if not even sure why they were speaking. 

“Sure I guess, what’s up?” The guy looked relatively troubled so Sebastian held his tongue on whatever derogatory nickname was about to come out, thinking he could attempt to be nice for the next 60 seconds. This better not take longer than 60 seconds. 

“Well, uh, just you were saying stuff about the proposal that seemed to make more sense than Artie’s ideas, so was just, uh, thinking if you had anything in mind?” he stuttered out, not even really making eye contact. Finn was slightly confusing; he was a fairly good leader and seemed like a nice enough guy when he wanted to be, but also never really knew what was going on or how to ask for stuff, his head usually empty. 

And Sebastian had a horrible,  _ horrible _ , feeling that he wasn’t asking about Schuester’s proposal. 

“Like I said, it’s a proposal not a strip show, it should be special, I guess,” he said slowly, not wanting to spook him off. “But, it’s also important it’s at the right time, you know, so that there’s no rush.”

Finn blinked a few times, squinting a bit as if unsure what Sebastian was getting at when it really was all too obvious-

“Don’t get engaged Hudson? I can tell you’re not asking about Schuester,” Sebastian sighed with a bored tone, slightly amused at the way Finn’s eyes widened and cheeks coloured, looking around the room as if afraid someone could hear. “I bet you love Rachel lots - fuck knows why - and that you’re really happy. But if you’re happy, then  _ stay _ happy. Don’t ruin anything by making a stupid decision years too early, when there’s absolutely no need.”

“But what else do I have? I’m not even good enough at football for any good scholarship, I’m certainly not smart enough for any good colleges - she’s the best thing in my life so why not show her that?” Finn almost demanded, somewhat sounding as if trying to convince himself. 

Sebastian had no idea how he’d ended up being this guy’s therapist, but he also seemed very much on the verge of a breakdown and honestly it would be messier if he did walk away right now. “Well first of all, that sounds kinda selfish Hudson; you don’t need to get engaged to her to show her you love her, do what literally any other teenager does, just go on dates or buy her shit, or sing a Coldplay song or whatever. It sounds like you’re having a crisis and falling back on your relationship as a last resort to build a life, which isn’t healthy.”

He ignored Finn’s splutters of protest. 

“And secondly, you’re 18. No normal person knows what they’re fucking doing, there’s no rush, no need to trip head first into something which isn’t going to work in the long run. And as much as it pains me to admit it, you do have some redeemable qualities, and are good at some things,” Sebastian continued, not allowing his face to express any form of emotion, those words were sappy enough. 

Opposite him Finn just tilted his head a little, a deflated look on his face that meant that Sebastian was going to have to go  _ further _ jesus christ. “Look, you’re somewhat good at leading, and you can be supportive when you need to be, I guess. Hey you look up to Schuester so fucking much it’s unhealthy, just copy him and become a subpar teacher.” Honestly he just sort of wanted this conversation to be over, but a part of him could admit that Finn wouldn’t be the world's  _ worst _ teacher, even if he didnt make it into the top half percentile. 

His comment seemed to have some form of effect though, the taller boy perking up a little and seeming to take in the idea, a bit more brightness on his face. “Thanks man, that’s actually helpful,” Finn said with a dopey smile, patting him on the arm. “I know we haven’t spoken much, and maybe didn't even get off on the right foot, but you’re a good guy, no matter how hard you try not to be. Maybe you could be a little nicer to my brother but-”

“-Ok we’re done here,” Sebastian interjected, not wanting to turn this into a lecture about Kurt for fucks sake, “see you around, don’t do anything stupid.” He gave Finn a last look which could almost be considered nice, before turning on his heel and leaving the choir room. If he saw a ring anywhere near Rachel Berry in the next few weeks he would drop out. 

~

Sebastian had managed to somewhat avoid a lot of the proposal madness over the next few days, just getting on with class and his sports teams, which frankly he should pay more attention to. 

Athleticism just came fairly easy to him now, after years and years of dancing and different sports, and so the fact it was one thing McKinley wasn’t completely awful at was handy. Even if he wasn’t on the football team - which undoubtedly dominated the school - the swimming and soccer teams held some level of renown and the guys were nice enough, a little more intelligent than some goons on the larger teams. 

Sam had recently joined the synchronised swimming team, meaning they occasionally were around the pool at the same time, the only two New Directions who seemed to even realise the existence of said pool despite both not having been there as long as the others. That was, until, the entire glee club marched into the space at the tail end of one of Sebastian’s practices, Sam leading them like a mother duck. 

He was standing out of the pool chatting to other members of the club when he saw them all come in, the guy he was talking to rolling his eyes.

“Smythe, why are The Wiggles currently walking towards us? I thought this was a glee club free space,” Matt said with mild dread, the rest of the swimmers sharing the same look. 

Sebastian barely bit back a groan as Sam waved at him excitedly, bringing them all over. “Christ so did I,” he replied blankly. He was suddenly aware he was wearing nothing but his trunks, skin still dripping with water from just getting out the pool, nearly fully exposed. Luckily for him, Sebastian had pretty much the inability to feel shame so just turned to face the new arrivals with a smirk and light flex, because yes, he was a narcissist. 

“Ugh see you later, you gonna be around for lunch tomorrow?” Matt asked as he got his towel to leave, Sebastian just nodding in response as the guys left. 

Sam bounded over with a grin, wildly gesturing around at the pool to the glee kids who all looked in stages of confusion, Santana with a wrinkled nose and the rest of the girls trying hard not to check him out. Blaine included. 

“See? Wouldn’t this be so sick!”

“Evans what are you going on about now? Why did you have to show this lot my safe space?” Sebastian moaned, crossing his arms over his chest. He really tried not to let his ego swell  _ too _ much when he saw Blaine’s eyes linger slightly on the water trailing down his hips, but he was only human damnit. 

Sam just grew his smile wider and moved to stand next to him, hand clasping on his shoulder excitedly. Sugar looked as if she was dreaming. “For Mr Schuester’s proposal! We should do it here! Make it a whole spectacle dude, like in those old Hollywood movies they love, can have the synchronised swimmers and everyone in the pool, it would be epic!”

There was a general murmur of consensus from the group, Tina and Kurt already putting their heads together and discussing ideas, whilst Sebastian and Santana made eye contact barely containing their bemusement. It really did sound unbelievably tacky, but also so was Schuester, so it probably wasn’t the  _ worst _ idea. 

“I didn’t even know we had a pool dude,” Puck said with wide eyes, Finn nodding next to him and staring round with his mouth open. They were seniors. 

“Yes we do and it’s great, please don’t feel the need to come here again though,” Sebastian replied with a sarcastic smile, raising a hand to push his hair back from his face, droplets falling from his forehead. This really was doing wonders for his ego, and great for Blaine’s ability to look anywhere but his direction. “If this pool proposal thing is actually going ahead, me and Evans can talk to Coach Washington I guess, try and get something taken care of.” 

That seemed to please everyone, people breaking off into groups to talk through different ideas or to simply ogle the half naked swimmers of the room, which yeah ok was valid. Sebastian did that a lot. Sam craned his neck and looked like he was trying to flag down the coach, humming and heading towards the stands with Kurt and Rachel in tow. 

Practice was over and it was starting to get fairly chilly, so Sebastian resigned to get his stuff and head to the changing room, when he bumped into Blaine and Tina. 

“Do you have matches?” Blaine blurted out quickly, staring very pointedly into Sebastian’s eyes and not looking anywhere else. “It’s just, I’ve never actually seen you compete at any time, for this or soccer, so it would be cool to, you know, see it.”

Tina was busy giving him her trademark glare with raised eyebrows, arms crossed over her chest but also being way less subtle about checking him out. She didn’t really seem bothered by him, but she was also dating Mike, so, he didn’t blame her. 

“Uh, yeah we do, not all the time but there’s meet’s occasionally, I can always let you know when,” he said with a shrug, not overly bothered about people coming to see him, it wasn’t like his parents ever did. He didn’t think too hard about the way his chest felt tight at the thought of Blaine cheering him on. 

“Oh awesome, Kurt loves swimming! He’s not too into sports but always watches the swimming in the Olympics so, I’m sure he’ll love it!”

Sebastian held back a cough, meeting Tina’s eye at Blaine’s comment with a slightly knowing look, so nodding slowly and carefully. “Yeah, I bet Hummel would just … love that. Definitely.” Blaine tilted his head a bit and the three of them stood there in silence before Sebastian plastered on a grin and went to move. 

“Alright, well, I’ll see you guys later,” he announced with a nod, turning to walk towards the locker room where some of his teammates were already trailing out, dressed and dried after not having been distracted by annoying show choir members. 

As he got out the shower and started changing in an empty locker room, his phone buzzed on the side, screen lighting up. 

**Blaine Anderson**

i really would love to come and see you swim some time, and im sure everyone else does too. you deserve support seb :)

He swallowed back any feelings that rose up, locking his phone again. Being friends with Blaine was going to be hard.

~

The proposal went about as well as it could have done, Sebastian guessed, as it was overly tacky and Schuester looked awful, but Miss Pilsbury seemed to like it at least. Plus, trying to choreograph underwater dancing was about as entertaining as it got, especially when Abrams just,  _ rolled _ himself into the pool. 

It did seem to make everyone disgustingly romantic though, all the various glee couples that were currently seeing each other making out and rubbing noses in the middle of the choir room, gazing into one another’s eyes. Seeing Kurt and Blaine hold hands, leaning against one another, well that was just something he could definitively live without. 

It was nauseating, as whilst all the romance crap wasn’t exactly his thing, the fact everyone was clearly getting some on the regular was frustrating. There wasn’t exactly much pick for him at the school, seeing as the only two out gay guys were Kurt and Blaine themselves, and whilst there were definitely more than a few ‘straight’ boys who would let him fuck them, they weren’t exactly forthcoming about it. The most he got were a few shy looks and blushing, not really offering to drop to their knees. 

But, Dalton on the other hand… There was a lot more up for grabs there, including those he already had in his back pocket. James probably would take a bit of convincing after last time when he had promptly told him to fuck off out of his car before he’d even got dressed again, and Sebastian wasn’t in the mood to have to put effort in. 

Josh though- they were yet to properly hook up, just exchanging flirty texts and photos whenever he was bored and wanted something to do, liking the attention and eager to please attitude. This guy wasn’t naive, or even inexperienced, but definitely had the whole wide eyed bashful thing going for him that really got Sebastian going. The small frame and dark hair was good too. And the uniform. Anyway-

Unsurprisingly, when he texted him to see if he wanted to get together, he got a fairly keen response, and was even invited over the Dalton dorms within the next half an hour, so if he had anything he still had his game. And whilst it was tempting to make him come over to the Smythe residence, and fuck him loudly with Sam in the room next door  _ just _ so he would hear, Sebastian did prefer to do these things away from home. 

Dalton wasn’t too far, almost closer than McKinley, as he lived somewhere in the middle between the two schools. And even though he would have certainly been a boarder if he’d been to the private school, it was another reason that it would have made more sense for him to go there. He wondered how his life would have been different, how the uniform and The Warblers would have changed him. If he would have met Blaine. 

As soon as he’d arrived, he’d been quickly snuck through security and the dorms by Josh - who was clearly excited, by the way the instant they were in his room Sebastian found himself crowded up against the door with eager lips on his, thighs sandwiched together. That wasn’t how this worked. 

Before long he had the Dalton boy pressed to his bed, hands firmly pinned above his head, working through frustrations and releasing tensions, inflating his ego by how well he was being received. 

When cleaning up, pulling his t-shirt back over his head and rummaging for the rest of his clothes, Josh clearly didn’t get the memo about leaving as soon as it was over, as he started to talk, non stop. And whilst at first Sebastian somewhat blocked him out, he then started mentioning the Warblers, and well now that was interesting. 

“Nick just really wants to do Michael, but it’s obvious that David doesn’t as much, so they’re always arguing which makes Jeff get all weird and don’t get me started on  _ Meatbox _ -”

“-Michael? As in Michael Jackson?” Sebastian cut in, pulling on his jeans and also thinking about what kind of fucking name Meatbox was?

Josh nodded as he lay on his bed, leaving a space open and clearly indicating he wanted Sebastian to get back into it. Fat chance. “Yep, it’s nothing certain but we’re definitely thinking about it, the council are working on a set list at the moment. Obviously with the acapella it takes a while to make the arrangements-”

“-Yeah yeah sure, so that’s Michael Jackson for regionals yeah?” The Warbler gave another nod as Sebastian finished getting dressed, sliding his watch back on and grabbing his phone. There was no way he was staying, as although maybe a round two would be tempting, it was obvious this guy was catching feelings fast and that was a hassle he didn’t want to deal with. 

He did however, just reveal a piece of information which had absolutely made Sebastian’s day, so he leaned in and gave Josh a kiss before leaving, as a treat. Kissing wasn’t usually his thing, but the Dalton boy had just helped him commit show choir espionage after all, so he deserved a little something.

As soon as he left the school, before he got in his car, Sebastian texted every single member of the New Directions with a grin on his face, a lot happier than when he had left to leave.

**Sebastian Smythe**

let’s do michael jackson for regionals

~

“I mean it’s perfect? We missed out on doing Michael in sectionals and you  _ know _ we would’ve bodied that shit.”

Santana hummed in agreement at Mercedes' statement, her head resting on Brittney’s shoulder. The entirety of the New Directions were sat in the choir room, the place abuzz with Sebastian’s text about regionals all seemingly on the same page about it. Apart from the Irish kid who he’d forgotten to message. Aka he didn’t have his name or number. 

“What do we think? Should we start brainstorming some set list ideas then?” Finn asked from the front as he paced up and down, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet. “I mean it’s not often we’re actually sort of prepared - hey what made you think of it anyway Sebastian?”

Everyone turned to look at him, all smiles and pleasantly curious faces, like the damn lollipop guild. He wondered if this was the best idea for a second, but overshadowed that quickly - this was doing what it took to win, and winning was important. 

Sebastian just grinned and leaned back in his chair, arms folded behind his head. “Well it’s a funny story really, but I’ll spare you the, uh,  _ intimate  _ details.” Someone groaned. “Turns out some of those Warblers are pretty loose lipped, and one of them might have let slip that they're thinking about doing Michael for regionals, in somewhat of a post orgasm daze. And seeing as  _ we’re _ going on first…” 

He splayed his hands out, feeling pretty damn proud of himself if he said so, thinking they were  _ finally  _ going to have a leg up-

“-What the fuck Sebastian-”

“-Dude what is wrong with you-”

“-That’s  _ illegal _ what the fuck bro-”

“-Is there something wrong in your head you psychopath-”

“-Woah guys, what’s going on?” Schuester strode into the room cutting off everyone’s completely ridiculous yelling with a concerned look, clapping his hands to stop the obscene shouting. Sebastian was beyond confused; ok so yeah, it was a little underhand, but it wasn’t as if the other team had an established set list or anything, it was just an idea? They all needed to calm down. 

Rachel stood up and stomped over to their teacher with her annoying hands on her annoying hips and gave him a death stare which would’ve been more frightening if she didn’t look like a middle schooler. 

“Sebastian just slept with a Warbler and stole their setlist, telling  _ us _ to perform what  _ they’re _ doing-”

“-Hang on I didn’t take their setlist Berry, just passed on the artist they’re thinking of doing it’s not like they have any arrangements or anything yet!” Sebastian interjected with a frown, straightening out his back. “I’d like to point out that I didn’t sleep with him in order to get this information, he literally offered it up willingly, completely unprompted.”

“You shouldn’t have been sleeping with a Warbler anyway! That’s cross show choir contamination,” Rachel continued, seemingly not dropping the point. 

Sebastian just leant forwards and fixed her with an annoyed look, returning with, “Didn’t you date someone from Vocal Adrenaline? And Blaine and Kurt dated last year? Also I’m sorry Berry didn’t you send someone to a crack house? I don’t get why you’re on my dick when I guarantee most of the people in this room have done fucked up things.” He kept staring at the front, not daring to look at Blaine and see his face. 

Schuester shook his head and sighed, one hand on the piano. “Sebastian that’s not the point - the point is we don’t do that, we don’t play dirty. It doesn't matter if he volunteered that information himself or not, if we acted on it that would be stealing and immoral, ok?”

“It’s betraying the Warblers, they don’t deserve that.”

Blaine’s voice was small but firm, and he finally let himself look over at the shorter boy to see his jaw set and eyes sad, Kurt’s hand firmly joined with his own. He didn’t get it - Sebastian wasn’t trying to do anything personal, betray one show choir in particular, this was just competition. 

“At least someone is  _ trying _ to do something and actually cares about winning.” Tina’s voice came from nowhere, a show of support that Sebastian really didn’t expect, and neither did other people from the way Kurt’s eyebrows shot up. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being dedicated and ambitious, actually having the eye on the ball, and I want to go to nationals again this year.”

“Not like this though! We don’t do things like that,” Finn replied quickly with the support of others. Sebastian realised he really wasn’t getting anywhere with this, sick off the accosting stares and judgemental looks so just rolled his eyes and stood up, pushing his way through the rest and storming out of the room. 

~

It was only half an hour until someone found him, although it wasn’t necessarily the person he expected. Mainly he had anticipated Hummel or Rachel to come up and bitch at him, or Mike and Blaine to do the whole ‘I’m not angry I’m disappointed’ thing. Having Tina approach him by his locker without a look of death in her eyes was somewhat interesting, he didn’t think they’d particularly spoken much before despite her closeness with Mike and Blaine, as honestly she somewhat scared him. 

“Can I help you?” he said, voice dripping with boredom and face blank. She crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows, leaning against the adjacent lockers casually. 

“Not the nicest way to speak to the one person who just defended you in that room.” Tina was as blunt and direct as ever, but Sebastian respected that in her, reminded him of Santana in that way. He didn’t know why the two of them weren’t closer. 

“Sorry, thanks for that I guess. Probably should’ve expected that fake morality group to cause an uprising.” Sebastian shrugged as he closed his locker, leaning so they were facing. 

The corridor was beginning to empty now, people heading off to classes or making their escape, so when Tina turned on her heel and started off, he simply set off after her. 

“It’s just so hypocritical of them,” she moaned with a flick of her hair, “I mean only just recently did Quinn try and frame Shelby for child endangerment, Finn just out Santana and Rachel’s list of war crimes is too long to even list.” He couldn't help but give a snort of agreement, following her out through the large double doors to the courtyard, where she sat herself down on one of the metal tables with a loud sigh. 

“Ok, stealing someone’s ideas isn’t the most ethically correct thing you could do, but it wasn’t like they had anything set in stone? Plus it’s a competition, we all want to win?”

Sebastian nodded in agreement, splaying out his hands. “Right? If I’m going to be in this shitty club then we’re going to win, the only thing more embarrassing than glee club is a  _ losing _ glee club. They’re just not taking this seriously enough.”

“Maybe it’s just because Rachel knows she can’t pull off a Michael song and she’s bitter,” Tina commented with a smirk, and holy shit why hadn’t they hung out before? “Look I know deep down most of them don’t care, and probably would have thought about doing something similar, I know people like me, Quinn, Kurt -”

“-Please don’t liken me to Hummel-”

“-or Santana have similar mindsets, but the truth of the matter is we’re a team, a unit, and we do shit together. And our general code of conduct, no matter how hypocritical it can be, is that we play by the rules, no matter what.” Tina looked genuinely fairly sympathetic at that, but resigned enough to it that it seemed she’d had to accept it a while ago. 

Sebastian opened his mouth to argue, to say that he could get around it no problem, and simply didn’t give a fuck what anyone else had to say, but the dark haired girl interrupted him before he could. 

“And Blaine, he probably won’t be too happy.”

He choked on air. “Blaine? What does he have to do with anything?”

Tina rolled her eyes again and crossed her arms; she really was good at that look. “Please, if that boy pouted you’d burn down the school for him, so I’m just  _ saying _ , if you want to stay in with him, maybe speak to him.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sebastian mumbled, incredibly unconvincingly. “But he doesn’t seem the type to get all up in arms about that, he’s pretty fucking competitive.”

“Competitive, sure,” Tina shrugged, “but he also wouldn’t want to betray Dalton like that, I mean he already feels like he has by leaving in the first place, if he then did anything which he thought was wronging them? He’d hate it.”

And even though he really,  _ really _ , didn’t want to admit it, she was right. And Sebastian probably should have thought about that. He knew how sensitive the whole Dalton thing was, Blaine’s trepidations about leaving and what it had done to him in the first place, the accumulation of guilt and regret. Maybe some more tact should have been involved. 

“I- maybe I’ll speak to him. Apologise, whatever. I don’t know, we’ll see,” Sebastian said nonchalantly, leaning back and staring up to the sky, completely avoiding eye contact with the girl in front of him. 

“Be careful, Smythe.” Tina stood up and flicked her hair over her shoulder, fixing him with another pointed look that was just the right side of intimidating. “Blaine is tough, but he leads with his heart and not his head, so don’t break him.”

With that slightly ominous warning she head off back into the school, leaving him sat there alone, trying not think about whatever the fuck that meant. 

~

Sebastian had lasted about ten minutes before texting Blaine to meet him. He sat inside the auditorium, legs swinging off the side of the stage with his jumper off next to him, tossed in a lump. 

He wasn’t sure why he asked for them to meet there on the stage, but it was where he had gravitated, so went with it. The memory of the last time it was the two of them alone up there came flooding back, before Scandals, before West Side, before things had gotten complicated. Blaine backed up against the scenery, Sebastian looming over him with a hand on his arm, heat radiating between the two of them. 

Shaking his head, he got rid of that image. 

From the back of the auditorium the door opened, a figure coming in with hands in their pockets and a short frame illuminated by the backlight. Blaine made his way down the steps in silence, just the sound of his footsteps clacking on the floor and a gentle hum of the lights, Sebastian swinging his legs. 

“This all feels a little theatrical,” Blaine muttered as he got closer, heading up the steps of the stage and crossing it, hesitating for a moment before sitting down, legs dangling the same way but a lot further from the ground. 

“Well you know me, I have a flair for the dramatic.” Sebastian reached out and pushed his shoulder slightly, a bit of a ‘bro’ move that was completely Sam’s fault, as they spent way too much time together. “I just, well, you seemed upset today, in the choir room. And I don’t want you to be upset.”

Blaine’s eyebrows shot up, a look of disbelief on his face. “Are you actually taking the high ground right now? Kind of presumed you were calling me here to give you a lecture on how winning is the only thing that matters and I should grow up.”

He ignored that presumption about him. “I mean I still maintain I was a  _ little _ bit right, don’t get me wrong, and winning is kind of the most important thing about a competition, I won’t deny that.” Blaine tried to butt in, but Sebastian raised a finger and shook his head. “But, I probably should have made the link between you and the Warblers, how you would have a problem betraying them like that. So, uh, I’m sorry, I guess.”

Sebastian didn’t apologise, or feel remorse, or guilt in any way. But Blaine did always seem to be the exception. 

The shorter boy exhaled out, head tilting up to look at the ceiling and pausing slightly, taking it in. “I just, I feel like I betrayed them when I left. I know I let them down. And sometimes it’s just, for what? To be here? Somewhere I still don’t feel like I fit in, an extension of my boyfriend? A boyfriend who’s so busy with next year sometimes it feels as if he doesn’t even notice me here in the first place?”

Blaine’s voice got louder and more pained as he spoke, amplifying the room and cracking through the air. Hummel territory was not the safest place to be, Sebastian not exactly the most impartial person to speak to, and not sure what to say without fucking up further. But the unbridled pain in his voice and the way it ripped out was heartbreaking, as if bottled up for so long, not having anyone to turn to about it. Everyone else was Kurt’s friend first. Everyone but Sebastian, and he had left. 

“Listen B you didn’t betray anyone, ok? And I can guarantee you that’s how the rest of them feel, those uniform wearing kids are all, deeply, deeply in love with you,” Sebastian scoffed, kicking their ankles together. “You know I’m not gonna sit here and tell you that transferring was the best choice, but it’s the choice you made, and to be fair people fucking love you here Anderson, and you fit.”

He took a deep breath and leant back slightly, playing with the jumper next to him and avoiding turning his head, not wanting to make this something into something more intimate than it was. “Kurt, I… it’s not my place to say. I could sit here and  _ say _ how he should treat you like the most special person on the planet and spend each and every day worshipping that ass and making you feel valued-”

“-Sebastian, not helping,” Blaine warned with a frown that wasn’t as unhappy as it could have been.

“I  _ could _ say that,” he continued, waving off the curly haired boy, “or I could say that sounds like something you should talk to him about, healthy communication and everything. He probably just doesn’t realise it Blaine, and I’m sure it’ll be better once he knows.”

Sebastian didn’t know if he believed that or not, seeing as he didn’t have too much faith in their relationship. Sure, they seemed to love and care about each other - he wasn’t  _ blind _ , but still, it didn't seem to ebb and flow in the way it was supposed to. Not that he was some kind of relationship connoisseur or anything, but he was pretty sure if one of the partners seemed to not notice their boyfriend’s unhappiness, and the other one essentially told another man they were into them, then that wasn’t perfect. 

Blaine tucked his arms around himself, biting down on his bottom lip with his brow furrowed, hesitating before looking up and meeting Sebastian’s eyes. “Would you do it? Take someone’s ideas, fuck them over like that? Just for a competition? Did Josh mean nothing to you?”

The tirade of questions hit him a little, the instant dismissive responses on the tip of his tongue dissolving when he looked at Blaine’s eyes, wide and golden. “Probably,” he admitted, voice small. “A few months ago, yes, no questions asked. Would’ve done a lot worse on top of that, with a lot less of remorse. Josh, well, I’m sure he’s nice and all, but he knew I wasn’t exactly in it for anything more than that, all I’m good for anyway.”

Blaine’s eyes narrowed and he shuffled closer, thighs almost touching. 

“Winning is important to me, always has been. People, well they’re a lot less important, inconvenient really. But I don’t know, something about being here, being with you sorry lot, well I feel a lot more fucking guilty than I would have done before anyway.” Sebastian swallowed hard, letting his ankles knock against Blaine’s ever so slightly, the contact jolting him. 

“Something about you, just makes me want to be a bit better I think.”

And it was true. Even when he put distance between himself and Blaine, there was just something about the boy that made him want to be different - he was still competitive, ambitious, blunt and direct, sure. But the notion of empathy was leaking in now, something which never really was important before, not exactly a value he was taught at home. 

“I just don’t want you to hurt anyone Seb, or hurt yourself,” Blaine said quietly, returning the touch. “If you would … fuck over someone you slept with like that so easily, maybe you’d do it to me too.”

Sebastian leaned back slightly, moving his hands away from where they’d been inching closer. “Are you, comparing yourself to a hookup of mine?” he asked in mild disbelief, yet again finding himself confused by the shit that would come out of the shorter boy’s mouth. 

Blaine flushed and his lips parted with a shake of the head, cheeks growing darker. “No! No, no not in that way, no, I just meant you know, in terms of closeness, and uh, trust. I trust you Seb, and I just, fuck I don’t know how to say it,” he sighed in frustration, squeezing his eyes shut. “You’re just someone that I trust here, and feel like has my back no matter what. And I don’t want to feel like you’re going to turn around and stab me in it just to get a leg up on something.”

It hurt a little, sure, but Sebastian couldn’t really find it in himself to be upset when, given the recent events, Blaine’s fears weren’t misplaced. He knew that he would want to do that to him, not be able to live with himself if he did, but also that being a nice person just wasn’t in his blood. Blaine trusted him, but he didn’t even trust himself. 

“I’ll never do anything to hurt you, we’re on the same side, remember?” he found himself saying, small smile on his face. 

Blaine nodded slightly, eyes looking somewhat sad as he stretched out his back, looking like in preparation to leave. “We’re on the same show choir, yeah.” 

The shorter man slipped off the stage, jumping down to the ground and turning to smile gently, hesitating just for a second as if to say something, before seemingly thinking the better of it, and heading out of the auditorium. 

~

Sebastian called Josh. 

He explained what he had tried to do, and apologised for it, mostly anyway. There was a fair amount of chastising from him about not letting slip information to the enemy, but still, he put in the effort. The Dalton boy seemed a little upset but it was nothing too groundbreaking, and honestly, it could have been worse. 

Speaking to the New Directions was a little more traumatic, but after Blaine’s vulnerability in the auditorium, he kind of felt he had to. Sam had been encouraging as well, that night after said talk with the shorter boy being spent with him and the blond talking it through over video games in his bedroom, in some weird faux manly way to talk about their feelings or whatever. 

Which is how Sebastian found himself standing up in the choir room in front of the gormless faces of the group, all eyes trained on him with varying degrees of desirability. 

“So, uh, I take back what I said about Michael,” he announced, hands in his pockets and staring directly ahead. “Although I  _ do _ think we should be taking this a lot more seriously and doing a lot more to prepare - sabotage probably isn’t the best way to go about it.”

He got some eye rolls and scoffs, but Blaine’s small smile balanced it out. Even Tina looked somewhat happy with him. 

“And I spoke to said Warbler who you know, let it slip-” he may have added a wink in there, much to Kurt and Rachel’s disgust - “and apologised, and said that we weren’t going to go ahead with it at all, and that it wouldn’t happen again.”

Honestly he felt like a child up there, apologising for pulling someone's pigtails or pushing someone over in the sandpit, but it had to be done he guessed, despite how painful it was turning out to be. Schuester had that annoyed proud look in his eye that came from being way too attached to his students. 

“Thank you Sebastian, that’s very mature of you to stand up and say,” their teacher said with a smile, patting him on the back particularly condescendingly. “But you’re right! We do need to get a move on with preparation for regionals, so everyone head down and let’s start thinking!”

He was gently nudged back to his seat so let his legs trail over to the plastic chairs, slotting in between Sam and Tina in a slump. 

“I heard you spoke to Blaine,” the dark haired girl whispered in his ear, hair tickling his face. “Obviously I’m not at liberty to discuss it, but I think he’s not unhappy.”

Cryptic as ever, Sebastian gave her an odd look and just rolled his eyes, because of course one of the biggest gossips he’d ever met would choose to be closely guarded with the information that would benefit him. 

“Dude you did a good job up there though, proud of you man,” Sam added with a fist to his shoulder, trademark grin on his face. Sebastian hated how happy it made him, he didn’t know how he allowed this to happen. 

“Hey Mr Schue!” the blond called out all of a sudden, “just cos we can’t do Michael for regionals doesn’t mean we can’t do him now!”

There was a resounding murmur of agreement from the kids, and then of course Blaine stood up to announce the  _ perfect _ song for them to sing, so within seconds the band was playing and everyone was up and dancing and-

And Sebastian kind of loved it. 

When Sam and Tina dragged him up to dance and Santana spun him around, he was sort of happy he didn’t try and fuck everyone over; when Blaine smiled at him and made him sing along, he hoped he didn’t end up doing it anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im shit at ending chapters they're all the same :) ANYway thank you so so much for reading!!! im killer-leo over on tumblr if u wanna say hi xoxo


	5. if your cascade ocean wave blues come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahh im sorry, this is the longest ive ever been in uploading chapters in fics but uni is up and running rn so im super busy, but thank you sm for all the lovely feedback ive been having it means the world!!  
> i have no idea how american high school works and i dont care about looking it up so yes sebastian takes both french and spanish because this is fanfiction about a fictional show and it works with the plot thank you <3\. also blaine wasn’t in 12/13 (apart from the last lil bit) so like, freestyle ig. there wasn’t too much i could find to say about 3x12 so that ep is like, super short, sorry!! was a lot to do for the next two anyway <3  
> also, think of the daniela andrade version of la vie en rose for the vibe of what sebastian sings, except he does it all in french :) just like the speed/accompaniment of it. i struggled writing this SM like i literally couldnt get it out so meh it's a lil all over the place but thank you sm for reading!!!!

Growing up in a conservative, republican, upper middle class white family, Sebastian would admit he had certain prejudices as a child and early teen, leeching off of his parents ideals and expectations to fit in with the society they perpetrated. Coming out and exploring his sexuality did sort of make him reevaluate all that, as once you understand that maybe what your parents tell you isn't always the truth and that actually your life is a lot fucking better than other people’s, then you sort of move out of that stage. 

Admittedly he was still a little,  _ snobby _ , but a significant improvement on what he once was, despite his remaining distaste for public schools - but that was the government's fault for making them shit. What all this meant though, was that he could see something for what it was, whether offensive, in poor judgement, or perpetuating negative stereotypes. 

And Schuester was managing to tick every box. 

The performance of ‘La Cucaracha’ was  _ shocking _ , and from the look on Santana’s face she agreed as well. Spanish wasn’t even something he wanted to take, but seeing as he was already fluent in French he took both languages, one a guaranteed full marks and the other something irritating but probably useful. He was smart enough for it not to be particularly taxing. 

The downside was that it meant having Schuester more often, and usually his teaching was subpar at best, but the latest display of cultural insensitivity really took it further, accompanied by members of the glee club that clearly were just not switched on enough about ignorance to realise they were doing it.

Santana’s nose was scrunched up and mouth turned down, taking in the heinous display with no concealed disgust, as Schuester finished up whatever the fuck he was doing. The bell thankfully rang, and the two of them legged it out of there before he could even think of talking to them, making their way down the corridor. 

“How is that man legally allowed to teach, honestly,” Santana grumbled, “I mean his only friends are children and he doesn't even know anything about his subject - and now I hear he wants tenure? For what? To traumatise teenagers forever until his body disintegrates?”

“Make a complaint,” Sebastian shrugged, nudging their shoulders together with the familiarity they’d acquired over the past few months. “If a student complains about him there’s no way he’s gonna get anything tenured, and honestly, we should have a Spanish teacher who speaks, you know, Spanish.”

His idea seemed to appease Santana who hummed and nodded, a thoughtful look spreading across her face. Honestly, the subpar teaching affected his education more than anything, but it was her culture and identity that was being manhandled right now, so Sebastian understood how it would be a lot worse for her. And he had her back, no matter what. 

“You want me to put superglue on his maracas so he remains an ignorant dick forever?” he asked with only half a jokey tone. 

Santana grinned and linked their arms, heading towards the cafeteria with an amused yet grateful expression. “As long as I can put Nair in his sombrero.”

“Deal.”

~

It turns out there was someone at McKinley who could actually speak Spanish, and he looked remarkably good doing it as well. 

For some reason Senor Martinez was reduced to night school when Schuester was allowed to teach genuine teenagers during the day, when not only was he a far superior teacher, but also  _ way _ better to look at, a sentiment which seemed to be shared by the entire glee population attracted to men. Even Kurt seemed to be getting himself an eyeful. 

The performance of ‘Sexy and I Know It’ was a breath of fresh air from the stuffy, broadway infused choir room, and getting to see Hudson attempt to body roll was probably the highlight of Sebastian’s whole week, not even complaining about being dragged up to dance himself. 

Additionally, getting to see Schuester in some attempt of Latin pop really was entertaining, despite suggesting a theme for the week that honestly just made Sebastian dread whatever it was he was going to subject them to. 

It turns out that Sam was also going to subject him to something awful as well, barging into his room in the evening with a manic grin that only suggested something bad. 

“Dude, I have the  _ best _ idea ever for this week’s assignment.”

He groaned and rolled over on his bed, dragging his eyes up from his book and taking a very deep breath to manage this conversation. “I really want to believe you, but I’m not exactly waiting with baited breath.”

“No honestly it’s perfect,” Sam rushed, coming over to flop down onto his bed next to him with very little disregard for personal space. “Cos it like, fits the criteria, but also it’s for Mercedes, so a total win-win man.”

Of course, Mercedes. Sam’s single train of thought at all times now, so Sebastian really shouldn’t have been surprised at this revelation. 

“You still clinging onto that idea? Come on, what are you gonna do if she says yes? Date her?” He wrinkled his nose up and gave a particular dramatic fake shudder, which earned him a solid punch on the arm.

“What’s wrong with Mercedes-”

“-Nothing’s  wrong with _Mercedes,_ just like, dating in general,” Sebastian shrugged. It was still somewhat confusing that Sam could get, literally any girl he wanted, anytime, and yet continued to try and be in a monogamous relationship. No thanks. 

The blond rolled his eyes and leant back against the wall, letting a dreamy expression come on his face that was nauseating. “Dude you just don’t get it, when it’s that one person, everything just feels perfect, like it’s meant to be you know? That they’re the exception to the rules.” Sebastian didn’t think of anyone in particular. “Have you never felt like that man?

Sam looked honestly earnest, eyes wide and head tilted, but clearly trying to bait him into a specific answer that he really wasn’t going to get. “You know I haven’t ok? I don’t do things like that, feel things that way. We’re just different, Evans.”

“Look, Seb, we’ve been living together for a while now, you know we can talk about our feelings yeah?” Sam pressed on, giving an encouraging nod. “And like, we’re bros, you can tell me anything, it’s ok to feel.” 

“I know it’s ok to feel,” he snapped back, too harshly. He sighed, feeling bad for somewhat lashing out and allowing himself to get borderline emotional. “I know it’s ok, but there’s nothing to talk about.” The image of Blaine flashed up in Sebastian’s head, the dumb feelings he would get him chest whenever he thought about dark hair and honey eyes, but he couldn’t talk about it. Sam would be understanding, helpful even, but Sebastian wasn’t there, not yet. 

“Well whenever there  _ is _ anything to talk about, you come to me, yeah bro? Just like how I come to you about Mercedes, and everything she does so amazingly-”

“-Ok, whatever, I get it. You’re in love it’s disgusting let’s move on. What’s your ‘perfect’ idea?”

Sam grinned and tucked his legs underneath him, leaning forwards onto his elbows. “Ok, so, it’s a mashup of ‘Bamboleo’ and ‘Hero’-”

“-Please god no-”

“-And I get you and some guys to back me up and we’ll wear those pointy shoes-”

“-Evans I’m begging stop-”

“-Puck can play guitar and we can have it all choreographed-”

“-Never speak again-”

“-And Mercedes is gonna love it!” Sam finished with a wild gesture, completely ignoring any attempt at complaining that Sebastian was trying to do. 

Part of him really wanted to just get up and leave his own bedroom at that idea, especially the  _ pointy shoes _ , but then Sam genuinely looked so excited, tapping out the rhythm on his leg and grinning at him expectantly, and Sebastian really had gone soft because fuck if he didn’t want to disappoint him. 

He let out a long sigh, very over the top, before turning to fix the blond with an exasperated look. “Fine, when do you want to rehearse?”

~

Sebastian would never want to admit it, but doing the performance with Sam was actually somewhat fun. 

Rehearsals consisted of all the guys just dicking around really, way too many of them involved with the dance so all bumping into one another, but everyone seeming to actually be enjoying themselves and giving it their all. He even found himself joking around with  _ Hummel _ at one point, to the disbelief of absolutely everyone, so that was quickly remedied with a tasteful insult. 

Honestly, he thought both of them were glad he switched them back to normal. 

And when it came to the actual performance, Mercedes seemed to actually be into it somehow, but Sebastian guessed it was Sam’s effortless charm that did that rather than anything else. Plus seeing Blaine dance and sing in the background really did seem to make it all worth it. 

After their group performance, the week sort of tailed out, getting to see Santana and Senor Martinez perform together, as well as Schuester delivering a crime to humanity with his strange Elvis/matador impression. The only single redemption was getting to see Santana completely call him out on it, but even that couldn’t wipe it from his memory. 

The week in glee club sort of passed like some strange fever dream, not much of it really sticking, and he found he barely even saw Blaine around, the shorter boy seemingly busy the entire time. Sebastian was hoping the next few weeks of glee would be as lowkey, allowing them to focus on regionals which were rapidly approaching, especially as they were up against some genuine competition that time, including the Warblers. 

Of course this was McKinley though, so when he arrived in the choir room on the following Monday, they had another dumb theme to look at rather than anything of importance. 

“So, Valentines Day!” Mr Schue announced with a clap of his hands and a large grin. “It’s coming up, so I think there would be nothing better to do than have this week’s assignment be ‘love songs’ and really lean into the season!” 

Because of course, singing about love in a group where most people had fucked each other was way more important than you know, preparing for their competition. And everyone in the room just seemed to love the idea as well, all the gross couples grabbing hands and smiling sweetly, the single ones slipping down in their seats trying not to stare anyone particular in the eyes. 

The groan Sebastian let out must have been somewhat more audible than he expected it to from the way Schuester stared over, hands on his hips. “A problem with this week's assignment, Sebastian?” It was problems,  _ plural _ .

“Is this the best use of our time?” he replied with a bored tone, arms crossed over his chest. Unfortunately, given the nature of all the lovey dovey crap in the room it seemed like he wasn’t really going to be backed up with this one. 

Schuester just sighed, clearly after half a year he hadn’t adjusted to Sebastian’s constant complaints and criticisms, giving his classic disapproved look. “Well, this club is also about fun, and enjoyment, and getting out of our comfort zones - you didn’t perform last week, so why don’t you this week?”

A sea of heads turned to face him, going back and forth between himself and the teacher as if spectators at a tennis match, all looking somewhat bemused. “I didn’t sing last week,” Sebastian drawled, “because it was a Spanish week, and I already speak English and French so I don’t need to add another language to that.” He was pretty sure Sugar purred.

Unfortunately, that just seemed to spur Schuester on, as he pushed off the piano and moved a little closer, small smile on his face. “Well then, French is the language of love isn’t it? And you’ve never performed a ballad, or any slow kind of song for us Sebastian, so I challenge you to sing a love song in French for us.”

Sam and Santana made an irritating “oooh” sound, Tina leaning over to prod him in the side with a cackle, Mike joining in soon after. He didn’t know what had happened where people would now openly mock him rather than be afraid of him. This was a disaster. 

“And why would I do that? No one here gains anything from it,” Sebastian replied instantly, narrowing his eyes at his teacher. Schuester just splayed his hands and tilted his head, walking backwards towards the board. 

“I mean if you don’t have the range for it then…”

At that the whole room went up in a chorus of “ooohs” and laughter, challenging looks on all their faces and if that didn’t piss him off then nothing would. 

“Ok I can sing a slow song, it’s not fucking rocket science-”

“-Can you even speak French? Is it all a lie?” Tina cut in with a completely wicked smile, leaning forwards onto her elbows. 

“Cohen-Chang I literally did your French homework last week,” he countered with a swift middle finger to accompany it, but all the damage was done. Unfortunately, his ego was as obvious as Fabray’s attraction to women, so their provocations were inevitably successful.

“Fine! If you lot want to hear me sing so badly I will, not my fault you’re all obsessed with me,” Sebastian grumbled, not fooling anybody. People in the choir room looked way too happy about that, and they all really needed to get a life. 

Luckily, any further discussion of him was deterred by Sugar abruptly standing up and making her way to the front of the room, turning on her heel and clasping her hands together vigorously. 

“Ok everyone! Look under your chairs!” she yelled out, grinning round at them, “except for you Artie, I hid your surprise in the wastebasket.” Everyone, in states of mild confusion, then proceeded to pull out heart shaped packages from under their seats that Sebastian had absolutely no memory of being there before, turning it over in his hands suspiciously. Anything this tacky had to be a trick. 

“This Valentines, my dad’s throwing a big party at Breadstix and you’re all invited! But, you need a date! No single people allowed; they’re sad. And boring. And don’t exist in my world.” Sugar followed this by staring pointedly at all the single people in the room, himself included. She really was missing the whole point of valentine’s day, which was to find  _ other _ single and make out with them in the bathroom, when desperation and neediness were at an alltime high. 

“But, you’re single…” Mercedes added slowly, trailing off when fixed with an annoyed look, as if that wasn’t a reasonable thing to say to someone who was fully single. 

Sugar just shook her head and looked around, throwing a wink out to noone in particular. “Not for long!”

The prospect of a party really was interesting, as in  _ something _ to do that was slightly different compared to the boring shit that happened everyday, but also Sebastian didn’t do dates. 

“I don’t do dates,” he said lazily, slouched in his chair. Sugar narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms over her fluffy jacket, clearly unimpressed with his statement.

“Well then do them, cos you’re not coming if you don’t!”

And apparently that was that, as she flounced back to her seat immediately after with a light giggle, almost tripping over Artie who was wheeling himself back. 

The Irish kid turned to give him a look resembling sympathy and kinship, and yeah, that was a real low point. Guess he was getting a date.

~

Sebastian was really getting tired of the abundance of public performances at McKinley. 

It seemed like every week someone was prancing about singing some tired ass song in front of the whole student population, but now it was near some dumb holiday, they were doing it more often, and about love. Which was fantastic. Some white guy with dreadlocks was now joining in as well, which was not just socially questionable but visually unappealing, no matter how good a singer he was. 

And anything which made him think about Finn and Rachel’s relationship was immediately nauseating. That and listening to Sam rap. 

“Isn’t it cute? The whole singing telegram thing?”

Blaine was smiling up at the four of them singing with an enchanted look in his eye, tapping his foot along to the Adam Levine song next to him, turning briefly to ask the question. 

“You mean the Jesus fandom over here taking over my safe space outside the choir room? No Anderson, I don’t think it’s cute,” Sebastian deadpanned back, earning him a light shove and laugh. “Hey I’m serious, you think they would even sing to us sinners? Aren’t we a little fruity for their holy ways?”

The shorter boy scrunched up his nose at that, staring up at him in exasperation. “First of all, who even says ‘fruity’ anymore, what are you, 40?” He cut off Sebastian’s complaining with a flick of a hand. “Plus we sit in glee club with three quarters of them every week - you  _ live _ with Sam - if they had a problem with gay people I think we’d know.”

“What about sandals kid? He seems pretty prehistoric,” Sebastian continued with a point over to the teen Jesus strumming his guitar. “Bet he wouldn’t have a problem with some stoning or whatever.”

“No Seb, you just want an excuse to hate love and happiness, stop deflecting.” Blaine tucked one leg under himself as Tina and Mike came over, settling down on their table opposite. “What are you gonna sing for glee club then?”

“Yeah, we all know you’re too much of an egotistical asshole to not go through with it,” Tina added with a laugh, flicking him in the leg. Sebastian thought about complaining, but who would that convince. 

He just stretched back on the table and shrugged his shoulders, pretending he hadn’t given it much thought. “I haven’t given it much thought to be honest, I’ll just get up there and sing in a couple days, not as if any of you lot will be able to understand any of it in French anyway.”

Mike coughed and raised his hand, the other arm slung around his girlfriend's shoulders. “I’ve been taking French lessons for a few years, I reckon I could piece most of it together.” Of course he could. 

“Well,” Sebastian said, with an eye roll, “you like me too much to say anything if I do decide to change all the lyrics to insulting everyone in the room, so does it really matter?” 

Mike tilted his head a little as if thinking about it, then ultimately just shrugged and brushed it off, replying with a “yeah fair enough” before settling back against Tina. 

The girl in question just leaned forward and fixed him with a wicked grin, one that he had learned to be very afraid of. “More importantly, who you bringing as your date to the party? I know you want to come.”

Everyone seated at the table turned to look at him in unison, all with similar expressions of keen interest and amusement. “God I don’t know Cohen-Chang, I’ll probably just pick up someone mildly hot and willing to makeout with me when I’m bored, it’s not exactly keeping me up at night.”

“Smythe you’re sad and pathetic,” came a voice from behind him, Santana walking past with a fed up expression. “Even I’m in a relationship, you need to sort yourself out.”

He opened his mouth to argue but before he could she tugged at his sleeve to drag him up, sighing as she went. “Come on, I’m going to ask the hobo with the guitar - not Sam, the other one - if he’ll sing to my girlfriend and watch his homeschooled ass squirm.”

And yeah she knew him really well, because that sounded fucking hilarious. They left the previous conversation and headed over to where the performance had thankfully stopped, leaving Blaine, Mike and Tina behind to inevitably gossip about him and his lack of romantic aspirations. 

~

For a week dedicated to love, it was kind of getting depressing. Because well, watching Mercedes bring the house down was of course a fucking treat in itself - and only increased Sebastian’s hatred for Schuester and his Rachel kink - but when it was in itself breaking the heart of one of his best friends, it got a little sad. 

As soon as she was finished, Sam wiped away a tear and got up, giving a sad smile but leaving the choir room briskly amongst the applause. Sebastian couldn’t really blame him, but he also didn’t blame Mercedes, as whilst dating wasn’t really his forte, he could understand her thinking. 

Sam was one of his closest friends though, if not  _ the _ closest, so when the clapping died down Sebastian found himself slipping out the choir room in search of him. Growing a heart and developing a conscience really was annoying. 

The blond was in the gym, the first place Sebastian looked, so he wasn’t even changed out of his school clothes by the time he arrived. Upon his entry Sam looked up and sighed a little, frame deflating at being seen. 

“Dude, I’m fine ok? Just gonna work out or something.”

Sebastian raised his hands in mock protest, just leaning against the wall casually. “Fine with me, you know I’m not exactly the type to want to talk about feelings or shit.” He got a slight nod in return, Sam turning to yank out something from his gym locker and lasting about five seconds of silence before looking back again with a slam of the metal. 

“It’s just, I’m crazy about her man?” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. “And she’s single now, so I thought that meant we could be together you know? Fuck knows I don’t want to  _ pressure _ her into anything I just… it hurts.”

The pain in his voice was clear, and even though Sebastian really wasn’t the comforting type, he went forwards to clasp a hand down on Sam’s shoulder, reassuringly rubbing his thumb against the t-shirt.

“I totally get that, and you know, you’re allowed to feel shit, no one expects otherwise. But just because she’s not ready now, doesn’t mean she won’t be? Give it some time, give  _ her _ some time and you never know what could happen.” Relationship advice wasn’t his area of expertise but that comment seemed to somewhat help, the blond looking up with grateful eyes. 

“Thanks man, seriously. It’s just, it’s hard to look to the future when it’s all so shit now. How am I supposed to sit in that room every day and think about how we both want to be together but we’re not?” 

Sebastian’s mind immediately rushed to the relatability of sitting in that choir room and staring at someone you want, but he quickly pushed that aside, blinking and staring back at Sam. “Think about all the other people in there who make it all worthwhile, or just laugh at whatever shit they spout. It’s what I do and I’m doing alright.”

Sam chuckled a little in response, some of the tension leaving his shoulders. For a second he looked somewhat happy, before eliciting a groan and rolling his eyes. “Oh fuck, I was gonna ask her to Sugar’s Valentine’s thing, now I got no one to go with. I’m just like, twice a loser now.”

“Shit man, sorry, I mean I’m sure you could ask literally any girl and-”

“-Dude! Let’s go together!” Sam blurted out, wide grin. “You don’t have a date do you? I mean obviously it’ll be like, a brodate, but it means we’ll both get to go and just have fun together?”

Sebastian really wasn’t expecting that, he’d give that to the blond, but he couldn’t help but admit it wasn’t an awful idea. “You sure? Just cos you know I’m a bit what they call gay as fuck, so…” Because no matter how non-discriminatory Sam had proven himself to be, literally turning up to a Valentine’s party with a gay guy was an understanadble place for him to draw the line. 

“Who cares?” Sam shrugged, “if anyone thinks it’s weird we can just call them homophobic and move on. Look, it sounds fun right?” He looked up at Sebastian with that dumb puppy grin which was irritatingly endearing, and he really couldn’t find it in himself to disagree. 

“Sure,” he agreed nonchalantly, “beats taking some twink who’s gonna expect me to be nice to them all evening anyway.”

Sam punched him on the arm and laughed, moving away to re-open his gym locker. “Dude I’m expecting you to go all out, I want roses and everything.”

“Only if you put out for me Evans,” Sebastian chuckled back, getting towel whipped in the process. Maybe Valentine’s wouldn’t suck so much after all. 

~

The holiday season was definitely in full swing, with half the population of the school disgustingly happy and loved up, the other half miserable and bitter. Even Kurt seemed to be in a good mood during the days, smiling into his locker and not glowering at Sebastian whenever he saw him, which meant Sebastian’s own expressions were one sided now which was no fun at all. 

This was until one day, when he was frankly minding his own business after soccer practice and a very angry very gay figure came storming up to him on the field, card gripped tightly in his hand.

“What do you want Hummel,” Sebastian sighed in exasperation, body worn out from a rather gruelling session and not particularly in the mood to be called devil spawn. “Thought you were allergic to the sun anyway.”

“You!” Kurt spat, thrusting the paper in his hand up. “You’re doing this aren’t you? Do you really have nothing better to do than try and get in everyone’s business?” 

He blinked a few times, attempting to bring himself back to some form of reality where what was happening made sense. “I’m sorry, what the  _ fuck _ are you on about?”

“All these notes, th-these gifts! Honestly Sebastian, it's sick and just annoying!” the other boy yelled, voice creeping higher in both frustration and anger. And usually he would love to gauge that kind of reaction, but this time he really had no clue what he had done to warrant it. 

“Look Hummel, I don’t know what you think has happened but whatever it is you’re shouting about, I  _ didn’t do it _ ,” Sebastian replied with a jab on the last word, finally catching a glimpse as to what was being waved in his face, something that looked like-

“Is that a Valentine’s card? Ew gross why would I give you one of those?” He scrunched up his nose and took a step back as he didn’t want to catch whatever psychotic break was going on in front of him. “Full offense but you’re really not my type-”

“-Right ok I didn’t think they were serious!” Kurt sighed, dropping his hand but remaining fairly rigid. “It’s just...are they really not from you?” 

“For the millionth fucking time, no, they’re not from me - what even is ‘they’ anyway?” This whole ambiguous pronoun game was pissing him off, but also mildly intriguing, especially if it was enough to get this much under Hummel’s skin. 

Opposite him the other boy ran a hand over his hair with an exhale, not dislodging his coiff but also not paying it as much attention as usual which really did mean business. “A few days ago I started getting all these anonymous things - all nice, and cute, and so I just assumed they were from Blaine-”

“-Sounds gay-”

“-Anyway,” Kurt interrupted with a frown, “I asked him about them today, saying he didn’t need to sign them from a secret admirer when it wasn’t really a secret, and he said they’re not from him.”

“And you’re sure he’s not just doing a whole ‘oh it’s really not me thing’?” Sebastian followed up, accenting his words with an exaggerated wink and nudging Kurt’s elbow, to which the other boy looked disgusted and yanked his arm away. 

“Trust me, he’s an awful liar, he was telling the truth.” There was a slight pause where Sebastian didn’t really know what to say, not when he seemed genuinely a bit shaken up, as that was very far from his area of expertise. “I guess I just assumed someone was playing some dumb prank, and, well, you do kind of like to take the piss-”

“-Take the piss, yes,” Sebastian interrupted, crossing over his arms, “psychologically tortue, no. If I wanted to annoy you I would just stain your clothes or kick your chair every glee rehearsal.”

Kurt narrowed his eyes. “You  _ do _ kick my chair every glee rehearsal.”

“Completely beside the point,” he said with a wave of his hand. “I’m just saying, this isn’t me, and it’s definitely creepy, so you should sort this out. Make a list of suspects and just work your way down, maybe enlist Santana or Quinn, they’re both a bit unhinged.”

The other boy gave a small nod and bit down on his lip, shoulders a lot less tense now as he clutched the card in both hands, and Sebastian couldn’t help but feel a pang of sympathy. Truthfully, he didn’t like Kurt, and Kurt didn’t like him, and that was a relationship he was more than happy with. But he wasn’t completely inhuman despite what some people thought, and this whole ordeal was clearly unsettling.

“Hummel, I’m sure this is all completely harmless ok?” he sighed, kicking at the dirt. “But you have Blaine, and I know he’ll be helpful and some kind of voice of reason, so speak to him. And if it keeps on going, tell your dad or someone, and let them take care of it.”

That earned him a small smile, something akin to gratefulness on Kurt’s face before they both composed themselves. “Ok, well, thanks Sebastian,” he said after a momentary pause. “I won’t tell anyone you were somewhat nice to me, it might make you melt.” He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows a little, “on second thought-”

“-Ok fuck off Hummel before I follow through with the threat to stain your clothes,” Sebastian mumbled with an eye roll, pushing past the other boy to head to the locker room to get changed, still grimy and sweaty after practice. First Sam, now Kurt? When did he turn into the New Directions therapist?

~

“Let’s give it up for Sebastian!”

Schuester clapped way too aggressively and gestured for him to come up to the front of the choir room, everyone else giving fairly half hearted support, leaning back in their chairs. He still couldn’t believe he had to get up there and sing a stupid love song; he had, of course, pointed out that unlike the rest of the glee club he didn’t have some annoying double meaning for performing that would make everyone uncomfortable (as per every other number), but was overruled. 

Performing was something he had no problem with, being a showoff and a narcissist, but he personally preferred more upbeat, dance based numbers, and especially when he wasn’t being coerced into doing it. 

The sea of faces staring up at him ranged from bored to excited, the select few people he deemed friends all looking way too keen at the prospect of him singing. And by keen he meant looking at him as if he were about to give a history presentation they’d be heckling. If anyone heckled they would not be seeing evening. 

“Well as per Schuester’s creepy request,” he drawled with hands in his pockets, “I’ll be singing for this week’s theme, in French, which hopefully shames you all for only being able to speak in one language.”

When thinking about what to pick, he honestly got lazy and chose the most basic French song he could think of, as he only really listened to english-speaking music anyway, sue him. It didn’t take long to arrange something a little slower, a little softer, giving it to Brad the day before to run it through. 

Sebastian fully expected at least three people to roast him for picking ‘La Vie en Rose’, but it did help him stick to his ‘I don’t care attitude’ at least, which was always a real bonus. 

Brad started on the piano, a light accompaniment, and he started to really hope people didn’t do that bullshit thing where they all joined in in the background, completely uninvited. This was his song, thank you very much. 

As he started to sing, the French trickling out his mouth with a much softer tone that he would usually sing in, Sebastian did feel an odd sense of vulnerability, something he never equated with performing previously. Truthfully he had always preferred dancing to singing, but even when he did sing, it was confident, sexual, brash. He used it to flirt, show off, show his dominance. 

And yeah, he was currently showing off, but in a much different way than he was used to. Even Santana didn’t look as if she was going to laugh or make fun, instead sitting back with her arms folded across her chest with a curious expression. 

He drifted off into the lyrics, losing himself in words which he didn’t even know if he grasped, able to resonate with anything so intimate, personal. No one had ever taken him into their arms like the way he was praising his love for, life wasn’t more beautiful for him with anyone else. His life wasn’t beautiful at all.

_ Il est entré dans mon cœur _

_ Une part de bonheur _

_ Dont je connais la cause _

_ C'est lui pour moi, _ __

Part of singing was making eye contact with your audience, that’s what he told himself when he stared directly at Blaine, words almost getting caught in his throat. The shorter boy was staring up at him with wide eyes, something Sebastian wasn’t quite deluded enough to suggest was wildly different from how he watched all performances, but it wasn’t the same. 

Similar to how their eyes met for that very first time, Blaine blushed a little and quickly looked away, finding the floor suddenly very interesting to stare out. Unlike the first time though, Sebastian didn’t feel that same sense of arrogant satisfaction, pleased to get the pretty boy blushing. 

Instead, he only wished that the gaze had been held longer. Or maybe not at all.

_ dès que je t’aperçois _

_ Alors je sens en moi _

_ Mon cœur qui bat. _

He trailed off the last note, the ending of it drifting away as Brad played the final chord and the resonance hung in the air. Sebastian inhaled quickly and looked away from his classmates, allowing himself a moment of recollection before the room started to clap, approving whistles and the appreciative cheers which came at the end of any performance which wasn’t a callout. 

“Thank you Sebastian!” Mr Schue announced with a smile, coming over to pat him on the back and looking genuinely pleased. “You really gave that your all so well done!”

The praise meant nothing, not really. Not that anything from that man really ever did, but it all felt especially hollow right now. Sebastian felt empty, his inner self still trying to latch onto what he had just done but unable to, the lyrics of a beautiful love and a beautiful life taunting him. He’d never wanted that, never needed that, which is why he supposed it was a good thing it wasn’t an option.

“Does this mean you’ve got yourself a date to my party?”

Sugar’s shrill tone ripped him out of his depressing spiral, looking up to meet her anticipatory stare. 

“Uh yeah, I’m just going with Sam,” Sebastian shrugged as he made his way back to his seat, fistbumping the blond as he sat down. 

“Wanky,” Santana smirked from the corner, earning her a solid middle finger and a wink from him, several other people looking as if they wanted to make a comment before Schuester clapped to get their attention. 

Next to him, Sam nudged their shoulders together and leaned in, whispering, “dude they’re just jealous” into his ear with a slow nod. Jealous may not be the word he would have picked, but judging from the look on Blaine’s face it wasn’t entirely false. 

~

Somehow a party organised by Sugar’s mafia dad managed to go off without a hitch - even teen Jesus came out very bravely as not hating gay people which really tied the whole thing together. 

The surplus of gross romantic energy was slightly improved by hanging out with Sam all night, as yeah, they lived together, but they did undeniably have a good time together, ignoring all the couples making out. 

Sebastian couldn’t hate the night, as Tina and Mike dragged them over to sing and dance around, as well as Santana and Brittney. He conveniently excused himself when Kurt and Blaine made the same move. 

Several times throughout the evening he caught Blaine staring over at Sam and himself with a confused expression as if trying to figure something out, before shaking his head and moving on. It was ridiculous, really, cos if him and Evans were fucking on the side Sebastian was pretty sure everyone in that gossip infested glee club would know by now, as well as the fact that they lived in the same house, so would be ridiculous really. 

Hummel came up to him alone at one point, and quietly informed him that he found the secret admirer, and told them he wasn’t interested. Sebastian even smiled, because he was nice like that. 

The party didn’t run on too late, and was completely devoid of any alcohol though, so it wasn’t necessarily the highlight of his life. Just when he thought McKinley was incapable of throwing an actually interesting night, Tina cornered him by his locker with a wicked grin. 

“Sugar just said that she’s throwing a regionals after party at her house, because her parents aren’t home! Like an actual house party!”

“It’s so sad that that’s the most exciting thing to happen round here in months,” Sebastian sighed as he slammed his locker shot, but undeniably excited about the news. “Assuming she’s gonna tailor it to work as a victory or condolences party given the outcome - either way people will be getting shitfaced.” Tina looked positively giddy with the thought. 

“You talking about Motta’s party?” Santana appeared from behind them, tightening her pony as she went. “She definitely has some top shelf stuff that I have no moral issue stealing.”

“What  _ do _ you have a moral issue stealing?” Sebastian shot back quickly as she leaned over and smacked him, Tina ducking out the way. “Anyway, is this like straight after the competition or what? Because there’s no way I’m turning up to a party wearing whatever tacky shit we’ll have on for the performance.”

The three of them set off down the hallway to glee club, where Mercedes fell into line and quickly started talking away with Tina about what they were going to try and smuggle from home to bring. 

“You’re not an annoying drunk are you?” Santana asked him warily, “because these people when they’re sober are bad enough you can only imagine what they’re like when they’re off their faces, and I need someone on my team.”

“Tana, I lived in Europe. I’m fine.” She didn’t seem too convinced by that for some reason, even though Sebastian could guarantee he could hold his drink twice as well as anyone in their sorry club. 

As they turned the corner to go into the choir room, she yanked on his arm a little and pulled him off to the side, letting Tina and Mercedes go in before them. “I’m just asking, because Blaine is a notoriously messy, clingy, drunk person, and I’m gonna need you to have some self restraint.”

He raised his eyebrows at her and pulled his sleeve out her grip, leaning in to whisper, “Sorry, what do you think I’m going to do?-”

“-I’m not saying you  _ are,  _ I'm just saying be  _ careful _ ,” she hissed back quietly, looking over his shoulder to see anyone else walking in. “He might be all over the place but it doesn’t mean he’ll feel good about it in the morning, and if you’re standing there staring at him, it’ll probably be a recipe for disaster. He won’t even know what he’s doing.”

Sebastian crossed his arms over his chest defensively, ignoring her eye roll. “Well drunk minds speak sober thoughts-”

“-that’s not fucking true-”

“-So maybe think about  _ why _ you’re saying that, huh?” he shot back without paying attention to her input. “Look, Lopez, I’m gonna be on my best behaviour, ok?”

She sighed and softened her face a little as the final dregs of people floated into the room. “I know, and I’m not insinuating you’d  _ ever _ do something he wouldn’t want, it’s more doing something he  _ would _ want.” There was a slight pause as she looked to the side and bit her lip, before just shaking her head and moving to grab his arm again. “Come on, let’s go suffer through another preparation rehearsal for a competition we should’ve been thinking about 3 months ago.”

They entered the choir room together as Schuester was beginning to talk, the looming competition now not seeming like the only thing he had to worry about.

~

A lot of boys in navy blazers with red piping were glaring over in his direction, whispering amongst themselves. Oops.

Sebastian had of course profusely apologised to the Warblers - as per Schuester’s request - after the whole Michael incident, but clearly tensions were a little high. Well, higher than usual seeing as they were backstage about to compete. 

Of course Blaine was over talking to them all anyway, not looking as out of place as he should do when standing amongst their uniforms despite not having donned his in a while, with a grin on his face the same as the blond and brunet couple he was talking to. 

Someone came and grabbed the Warblers, informing them it was their turn to go on and for the New Directions to take their seats, so Blaine was dragged away from his friends after wishing them good luck as they all started to head towards the auditorium. 

“You feeling ok about competing against them?” Sebastian asked with his hands in his pockets. They were towards the tail end of the pack, Kurt and Mercedes next to them. 

Blaine gave a small shrug, and looked over his shoulder quickly at his old classmates with something on his face which someone else may mistake for wistfulness, but Sebastian recognised it as something more like acceptance.

“Yeah, I’ve come to peace with not being a Warbler anymore,” he replied truthfully with a smile at Kurt who turned to look at him, expression mirrored. “And it’s nice to see them anyway, nice to have them in the crowd cheering us on, even if they are our competition.”

Sebastian didn’t doubt it would be hard for him, but enough time had passed for it not to be too painful anymore he reckoned as they took to their seats, settling in next to Mike. 

Blaine spent the entire of the Warbler set smiling and clapping and looking proud, so that was something at least. And they were good - threateningly good. A mix of guys took the lead, vocally outstanding and moving alright, although he did notice they somewhat lacked a clear leader and hierarchy, which may knock them down a little. 

There was something about the group that intrigued him, their style clearly methodical and meticulous, and their level of preparation was something far more suited to him than the absolute shambles of McKinley, from the matching uniforms to synchronised dancing. 

However he’d been at the public school for long enough now to have unfortunately grown attached to his classmates, and feel a sense of loyalty and community there which honestly, he hadn’t expected. Sure, he would have fit in with the Warblers, that was something undeniable, but there wasn’t that longing he had previously felt to be at Dalton, to be anywhere but McKinley.

As they moved from their seats, to applauding their competition, to making their way backstage and eventually beneath the burning lights of the auditorium, Sebastian was actually somewhat proud to be where he was.

~

“SMYTHE! Don’t hog the good stuff to yourself you French bastard!”

He could barely hear Santana on the other side of the room from where he was tucked away in the corner over the noise of screaming, laughter, and the questionable music Sugar had got on. Thankfully it had ended up being a victory party after their win at Regionals, meaning the vibe was a lot happier and carefree than the self-pitying depression it could have turned out to be; there was definitely a lot less crying going on. 

As a man with taste he had carefully selected the less shit alcohol for himself at the beginning of the night as a way to avoid suffering through cheap beer, the bottles of whisky currently hidden behind him as he was being verbally accosted by Santana, who was firmly planted on Brittney’s lap. It really didn’t take long for people here to get completely shit faced, something that he realised after the fact they’d currently only been here one hour and everyone was in complete states of disarray. 

He’d already been dragged into some weird dance off that was so embarrassing it could only happen at a glee club party, and gotten two lap dances from Brittney which made Santana look like she was about to combust. 

There was random bits of clothing on the floor, an odd smell coming from behind a closed door, and empty bottles littered across the room which were one failed dance move away from being a serious safety hazard. 

But, Sebastian wasn’t judging - not anymore than he usually was. Winning felt fucking great, and they all deserved to let off a bit of steam anyway. He’d be cracking the whip as soon as they were back at school to prep for Nationals, so better make the most of it. And make the most of it he had, because currently as he was trying to look at Tina there were about two of her, and she was swaying side to side rather uncontrollably. Maybe that was him. 

“Do you think Sugar’s dad is in the mafia?”

A warm weight slid up next to him, and Sebastian looked down to see that it was Blaine’s arm pressed against his own, the shorter boy somewhat leaning against him but still staring around the room, bottle rim balanced under his lips. Lips that were very distracting currently, wet from drinking and slightly red, along with the flush on his cheeks. Very distracting. 

He realised that he’d just been staring instead of answering, so quickly cleared his throat and looked away, but made no effort to move. “I think he’s definitely in the mafia, either that or he’s some drug lord, but I feel like if he were, Sugar would be coked up all the time and that would be way too obvious.”

Blaine snorted at the comment, shoulders shaking slightly as he laughed and tipped his head back, exposing his throat where the top buttons of his polo were undone. Fuck, Sebastian really wanted to lick it. 

“Sugar coked up sounds like a complete nightmare, no thanks,” the shorter boy replied, before lifting his drink and draining it, setting the empty bottle down on the side with a rather loud slam. His eyes unmistakably dropped to Sebastian’s mouth, just for a second, but it was enough to be obvious and loud, dart of a tongue coming out to wetten his lips, the bob of his Adam's apple. Santana’s previous warning was ringing in his head, but it was kinda hard to think of anything she said when Blaine’s body was pressed so closely against his.

“Are you having fun? I mean, not that I think you’re not, just, I want you to have a good time, and you can like, let go a bit? If you want? Like, we  _ won _ .”

By this point Blaine’s hair was nearly all undone from his gel and was heavily leaning into Sebastian’s arm, arms moving wildly as he spoke, his words slightly slurred anyway. “I am having fun killer, and you  _ clearly _ are as well,” he teased lightly. It wasn’t a lie either, Blaine had been dancing round the room since they all arrived, dragging Tina into singing with him on the sofa and making Kurt twirl him, pretty much invading everybody’s personal space in a way that only Blaine could make seem endearing. This was his first time speaking to Sebastian though.

“Of course I’m having fun! Why wouldn’t I be? We won Regionals, I’m with all my favourite people, I’m drunk - like, there is literally no downside,” he exclaimed with a grin, turning his head to stare straight up at Sebastian’s eyes with a slight wobble. The noise from the main part of the room was slightly tuned out to him, like someone had put a muffler on it and the only sounds of importance were in the tucked away corner that he and Blaine were in. 

“Favourite people huh? I better be included in that Anderson, you’re the only reason I joined the dumb glee club in the first place.”

He saw Blaine blink a few times, something akin to confusion spreading on his face which was slightly marred by his glazed eyes and flushed cheeks. The warm presence against his arm didn’t falter.

“I mean, that wasn’t the  _ only _ reason you joined, was it…?” he asked slowly, visibly swallowing. Sebastian immediately felt somewhat self-conscious, but had enough alcohol in his system to not try and brush over it in the same way he would if he were sober. 

“Pretty much - I wasn’t going to join but then I saw you sing, and saw, well,  _ you _ , and decided in that moment that I was gonna be in glee.” He gave a light shrug but didn’t move his eyes, his green still staring down at Blaine’s golden. The air between them was noticeably warm, thicker than it should have been, the space smaller than the room they were in. 

Sure, it had never been a secret that Sebastian’s reasons for joining the club were somewhat to do with a certain ex-Warbler, but he guessed he’d never spoken it out loud that transparently before. And it was clear Blaine also hadn’t expected that response, from his wide eyes and slightly parted lips, their fingers occasionally brushing from where hands were trapped between bodies. 

“Well, you know how glad I am you’re here,” Blaine said slowly, twisting his body so they were almost facing. “Even if, you know, you may be disappointed that nothing’s happened.”

It was brash for Blaine, such a bold acknowledgement of whatever the fuck was between them, something he tended to like to breeze over as much as possible. Recently Sebastian had been the same, after his acceptance that things just weren’t going to happen for them, not when he’d gone and gotten feelings and couldn’t just fuck him and leave him any more, not when he suddenly felt something he couldn’t give.

But the thing was, he was drunk, Blaine was hot, and sometimes he didn’t want to be so fucking  _ good _ all the time.

“Why would I be disappointed?” he almost whispered, repeating the shorter boy’s motion so they were now facing each other. “I get to see you every day, look at the way your ass fills out your pants and shirt’s squeeze your arms.”

Blaine quickly inhaled, making it so goddamn  _ easy _ with the way his pupils widened. 

“Sebastian-”

“-I get to see the way your cheeks flush when you look at me, the way your eyes darken and quickly look away,” he purred, leaning in so his lips were close to Blaine’s ear, the shorter boy stood still but breathing heavily against him. “I can’t be disappointed, not when I know you want me so much and I get to stare at you every day thinking about fucking you, knowing you’re thinking the same thing.”

Opposite Blaine made a noise which was almost a moan, and almost made Sebastian grab him and pin him against the wall right there, only exercising self restraint through the fact that although they were somewhat in the corner, there were still very much people in the room. Before he could do anything else, say anything else, Blaine took a small step back, pupils fully blown and breathing hard.

He opened his mouth to say something, inevitably a denial or refusal by the way he was starting to shake his head, but before he could speak Rachel’s voice screamed out through the house.

“SPIN THE BOTTLE!”

There was a chorus of yelling and cheering, everyone staggering over to the center of the room with some mutterings of “god not again”, and suddenly Blaine was moving away, mouthing “don't” at him before turning and leaving, sitting down in the oddly shaped circle they’d made. 

Sebastian let himself breathe for a second, thinking about what he’d done, how Blaine had reacted to it, and then being annoyed at himself for getting so worked up about it. He’d said worse stuff to guys he’d known 15 minutes in a club, it wasn’t exactly like he’d actually  _ done _ anything. The worst thing was how Blaine reacted, how he was so clearly lying to himself, but was never going to do anything about it, no matter how much he wanted to.

“Smythe get your ass over here!” Mercedes yelled out from the circle, patting the floor next to her very aggressively, so he shook himself out and went over, sitting down with a thud. 

He’d heard about the last spin the bottle game they’d all played, and imagined it was about as messy as this one, as Quinn and Tina made out in front of him as if their lives depended on it, Mike not looking as concerned as he should’ve done. Men. 

Sugar exchanged a brief kiss with a way too excited Puck, as Blaine and Mercedes gave each other very giggly kisses which clearly neither one of them took too seriously, unlike the Santana and Brittney make out which was clearly orchestrated. 

Blaine avoided his eyes the entire game, spending most of it hand in hand with Kurt who only left that grip once to kiss Rachel whilst looking as if he’d rather throw up the whole time which was particularly entertaining. Sebastian knew what he was doing, he was feeling guilty about their conversation and was now latching onto his boyfriend as a way to compensate, make himself feel as if he did nothing wrong and that everything was perfect. Not that anything had even  _ happened _ . 

Brittney span and it landed on Sam, which was followed by Santana straight up not letting them near each other, it was the blond’s turn to spin the bottle, giving a shrug and only looking a little bummed about being denied Brittney. The glass did a few rotations, until slowing down and eventually landing on … Sebastian. Now that was interesting. 

“What a fucking surprise,” Puck cackled, “$10 one of you did that on purpose.” Sam just flipped him off and rolled his eyes as everyone laughed, but did give Sebastian a quick wink. The blond didn’t even hesitate before getting on his knees and shuffling in a bit, seeming to not care about the whole ‘gay’ thing. 

The comment from Puck wasn’t a surprise, seeing as how everyone joked about the two of them all the time, but he was pleased it didn’t seem to deter Sam who was grinning at him expectantly. And Sebastian really wasn’t to turn down a kiss, especially not from someone as hot as Sam. The fact Blaine was glowering at the two of them may have been an added bonus. 

He got on his knees and inched closer, until their legs were almost touching and the distance was minimal, quickly looking in Sam’s eyes before leaning in. His intentions were for just a quick kiss, not wanting to come off as some predatory gay to his friend, but after a second of their lips touching Sam pressed them closer together, a hand snaking up his face before he could pull away and then all bets were off. 

Sebastian dragged his tongue along the blond’s lower lip and pushed them closer, letting his hand fall down on Sam’s thigh as the hand on his face moved to fist into his hair. There was some noise around them, but all he could focus on were their lips sliding together, Sam eagerly pushing his tongue forward and actually  _ moaning _ into his mouth, nails scraping along his scalp. 

Someone cheered but he didn’t care, letting his hand move further up Sam’s thigh as he grazed his teeth over his bottom lip, their foreheads pressed together and mouths wet and hot. Sebastian squeezed his thigh, and then slowly pulled back, dragging Sam’s lip lightly as he went before settling back on his heels, the world hazy around him. 

The blond was almost gasping, his chest pounding and lips red and swollen, eyes glazed over and black. There were several wolf whistles as they both returned to their normal seats, Sebastian sat back lazily with his legs extended feeling a few eyes on him, especially a pair of honey ones which were accompanied by balled up fists. 

Honestly the game ended soon after that, most people had had at least one bit of fun and no one was going to top what he and Sam had done. Sam, who had gone oddly quiet after, and whilst he was in no way avoiding eye contact, just spent the majority of the time staring at the wall. 

People started to disperse, and Sebastian decided to follow the blond to check he was alright, and make sure he didn’t cross any lines, as making out with a gay guy in front of all your friends may not be the easiest thing to come to terms with. He saw him slip out the backdoor so snuck out after him, walking into the cool evening air with hands in his pockets. 

Sam was sitting on the bench outside staring out in front of him, gently biting at his lower lip.

“Hey man, you doing ok? Seemed a little spaced in there,” Sebastian announced as he came and sat next to him. “Look, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable-”

“-Oh dude no!” Sam interrupted, waving him off. “Nah you didn’t, I promise, this is just …” He sighed deeply, letting his head fall back against the wall and tried a few times to speak, but just couldn’t get the words out. 

“I think I might like guys and girls.”

Sebastian blinked a few times, noting the sincerity in his friends voice. “Just from the kiss? Because if you’re drunk that’s not always the  _ best _ way to measure it-”

“-No, I think I’ve known for awhile now,” Sam admitted slightly under his breath. “I just thought everyone noticed how nice dudes look and sometimes think about making out with them or like, holding their hand. Am I allowed to like both?”

He stared so earnestly up at Sebastian that his heart broke a little, and he realised that Sam probably just had no idea. “Yeah man, you’re bisexual. And that’s totally cool, means you have more options,” he added with a nudge of the shoulder, earning him a laugh. “You’re allowed to like both, there’s nothing wrong with it.”

Sam breathed such a heavy sigh of relief his shoulders deflated, a smile escaping on his lips with an easy happiness. He turned to look at Sebastian, patting him gently on the thigh. “Don’t let your ego grow, it wasn’t all cos of you.”

He leaned back and tucked an arm behind his head, grinning over at his friend. “Oh I don’t know, it was a pretty hot kiss Evans.” Sam swatted him on the arm in mock annoyance and chuckled, standing up and grabbing his hand to drag him up with him.

“Well it’ll keep the gossip mill running for a bit anyway.” The blond paused for a second, stopping from walking back inside to turn around and look at him. “I don’t think I’m ready to say anything to anyone else, not yet, anyway.”

“That’s chill man, don’t have to say anything,” Sebastian shrugged. Anyone’s sexuality wasn’t anyone else’s business, he wasn’t going to go round saying it out loud. “We can talk about it later if you like, when we’re home. And a little more sober…”

Sam nodded and smiled, extending a fist to bump as they moved to head back inside. “Sure thing bro, we can like, gossip about guys now you know?”

“We really don’t have to do that,” Sebastian replied with a wrinkle of his nose. Sam just cackled as they reentered the warm house, giving him a good natured shove before running off to Mike on the sofa, Sebastian finding himself gravitating towards the drinks section yet again. 

The night got a bit blurry after that, and didn’t last too much longer. He spent a while with Santana on an armchair, pretty sure he was speaking in French and she in Spanish, but seeming to understand her perfectly fine. He Puck and Mike also ended up wrestling outside for awhile, before Tina dragged him and her boyfriend back inside and he managed to escape before she coloured in his face with a pen. 

In the early hours of the morning he and Sam stumbled home, getting an Uber most of the way back but finding his house eventually, agreeing to talk in the morning again about their previous conversation but passing out in their respective rooms pretty soon after that. 

Sebastian drifted off fully dressed, dreaming about competition trophies and curly hair, wishing he wasn’t so alone in the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the english translation of the lil bit of la vie en rose i put in it ‘He entered my heart A part of happiness Of which I know the cause It's him for me’.  
> also i know this chapter really wasn’t a lot of seblaine - and the fic so far hasn’t been a load of seblaine either, buttttt from the next chapter it essentially becomes all seblaine so like, that’s exciting. only took tens of thousands of words lmao   
> thank you so so much for reading!! after going over this chap so much i actually hate it but the next one ive started to plan and hopefully will be way better xxx so to quinn and ella for being my big time cheerleaders ily x  
> im killer-leo on tumblr if you wanna say hi <3


	6. family that i chose now that i see your brother as my brother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this boy LONG. i know the previous few chaps have barely been seblaine but those mf’s SPEAK now so ur welcome :) and again, i am not watching these so im sorry for any discrepancies!! please dont make me actually rewatch glee xoxo
> 
> obvs this covers whitney ep (3x15, 3x16, 3x17), n i just wanna preface it by saying that im not a huge kurt stan, he isnt one of my faves at all, but i dont believe in making his character over the top worse and like super horrible when he isnt always, so ive tried to make it as like amicable as possible so if you like kurt this should still be in character!! but also the chandler incident … yikes :/
> 
> also, now we’re post regionals, there’s another fic in progress atm which covers sebastian at mckinley from this point, called burn baby burn by pseudowoodo, and it’s literally incredible flawless amazing showstopping, do check it out!!! 
> 
> BIG THANKS to ella for proof reading i am in love with u <3 and quinn bcos quinn xoxo

Now that Sue was helping them out in preparation for Nationals, Sebastian was actually enjoying rehearsals. Strenuous, rigorous dance training, actually getting people to  _ move _ their bodies? It was great, finally getting somewhere with what they should have started months ago. 

Cleary not everyone agreed from the whining and complaining, but they also whined and complained about losing last year so really, they just needed to pull themselves together and fucking pick a side. Just like last time, himself and Mike were helping out, meaning he got to whip them into ship again and Sue let him be as authoritative as he wanted, so everything was going pretty perfectly.

He and Mike were just chatting at his locker about a plan for the next dance training - again, he was  _ never _ going to call it ‘booty camp’- when Sebastian saw a guy probably in his late twenties making his way down the corridor, leather jacket and aviators on, looking absurdly out of place at McKinley. This stranger was clearly hot, but there was something slightly familiar about him that Sebastian couldn’t quite place, until-

“Hey Squirt!”

The guy clamped his hands down on Blaine’s shoulders where he was chatting to Kurt, and-

_ -oh _ -

-it all made sense. Sebastian remembered Blaine had once mentioned a brother, someone a lot older and living in LA, and this man  _ screamed _ LA energy.

“Is that Blaine’s brother?” 

Mike spoke from next to him peering over his shoulder, seemingly like the rest of the students who were finding great interest in the extra Anderson. 

“Isn’t he from some TV ad?” he added, causing Sebastian to narrow his eyes slightly at the man who now had an arm slung around Blaine’s shoulder and Hummel basically foaming at the mouth behind them.

“Yeah I think he may be, Blaine doesn’t exactly talk about him much, think he mentioned his name was Cooper or something?” Sebastian strained a little to try and hear what they were talking about, only really picking up on Kurt’s fawning. The brothers walked off down the corridor though leaving him unable to keep being nosy, not making it far before Sue accosted them, but by then they were far out of earshot. 

“I don’t think Blaine ever mentioned a brother, are they like, not close then?” Mike asked beside him, bringing Sebastian back to his own conversation by his locker. He debated what to say; their one talk about the other Anderson had been short lived and a bit tight lipped, clearly not the most fond topic for Blaine. 

After seeing Cooper in the hallway, Sebastian could see he was clearly a character. His presence was huge in the small corridor and he carried himself in that charismatic, cocky way which he somewhat recognised in himself. He was an only child, but had enough understanding of sibling relationships to gather that growing up as the much younger brother to someone like that would take its toll, especially on somebody like Blaine who could be so forgiving and eager to please. 

“I think there’s just a big age difference,” Sebastian said slowly, figuring that the shorter boy wouldn’t want his business being spread, especially when he didn’t exactly know all the details. “And he lives out in LA so don’t really see each other.”

That seemed to satisfy Mike who gave the brothers another quick once over and hummed, before returning his attention to getting his books out the locker. He proceeded to then list off a bunch of different exercises and ideas for dance rehearsals to Sebastian who, honestly, didn’t pay too much attention to his friend in lieu of staring over at where Cooper and Sue seemed to be in conversation, trying to figure out what the fuck they could be talking about. 

Hummel was still drooling and Blaine looked less than impressed, arms crossed over and a pouty expression which he knew meant a lot of inner frustration. Sebastian got the whole, complicated family relationships thing, so felt a pang of empathy, followed by a pang of pain as Mike pinched him on the arm. 

“Smythe stop staring daggers and help - are you free Tuesday or not?”

He rubbed his arm and gave a glare in return with very little heat in it, replying, “I have swim practice sorry, I’ll text you my schedule? Whatever we agree on Sylvester will probably overturn it anyway but worth a shot.”

Mike nodded as he shut his locker, checking the time on his phone before swearing under his breath and slinging his bag on his shoulder. “Sure, I gotta run but I’ll see you in glee yeah?” Sebastian just slapped him on the shoulder and smiled, being left by his friend who returned the gesture and headed off down the opposite end of the hall. 

He had a free period before glee club, and irritatingly both Mike and Sam had classes so he set off to the library in an attempt to do some extra reading - something practically unheard of in the hallowed halls of McKinley where it seemed some people deemed attending half their classes was the maximum effort needed.

Sebastian made it out to the courtyard ready to cross over to the next building when he was accosted with the sight of Blaine and his brother immediately, sitting on a metal table having clearly escaped Sue and Kurt elsewhere. 

He made eye contact with the shorter boy, somewhat freezing where he stood as they did, as Blaine’s eyes widened a little. 

The thing was, they hadn’t actually spoken since the party. 

Sebastian had been way more forward than he had intended to, and Blaine had been way more into it then he had wanted to be, and now there really was no skirting around it. But he and Kurt were still together, and nothing had changed, so it just left a weird middle ground that either one of them was yet to encroach upon. 

It did seem though, that Cooper Anderson had no problem encroaching on this. 

The older brother stared between the two of them, and Sebastian heard him say to Blaine, “Is that your friend?”, not giving him much time to answer before craning his neck and waving him over, beckoning with a grin. 

Technically he had more than one option. He could just walk away. Ignore the potentially uncomfortable situation. But curiosity really got the better of him, and Sebastian was intrigued by their dynamic and just the Anderson siblings in general, so despite Blaine’s small look of panic turned on his heel and made his way toward their table. 

“Squirt are you going to introduce us?” Cooper asked as Sebastian got closer, raising an eyebrow at both brothers, particularly at the rather endearing nickname. Wordlessly he slid down next to Blaine, opposite Cooper, and gave a small nod of greeting. 

“Don’t call me that,” the shorter muttered with an eye roll, turning to give Sebastian a brief look but not letting himself linger. “This is Sebastian, he’s my friend from glee club. Sebastian, this is Cooper, my older brother.”

He extended a hand out, the gesture being readily received with a solid handshake and a brief once over, his entire self clearly being analyzed to some degree. “Pleasure,” he drawled, lazily letting his arm drop back down, “Blaine hasn’t mentioned much about you, but it’s clear the Anderson family has been blessed with good genes.”

The compliment was visibly soaked up by Cooper, the bit of affirmation making his back straighten and smile a little more dazzling, although it had the opposite effect on Blaine. Sebastian immediately regretted it, wishing he would’ve thought before shamelessly flirting like he usually did, quickly understanding the dynamic between the brothers. 

“Although,” he added with a glance at Blaine, “knowing this guy here he got most of the best ones, he’s pretty much the most talented person I know - being easy on the eyes is just an added bonus.”

That seemed to delight Cooper, for some reason, who just continued his stare at the two of them as he leant forwards onto his elbows. “The kid is good at what he does, I’ll give you that, always has been since he was even smaller and running around in diapers screaming along to Elton John. Fourth grade really was something-”

“-Ugh god please stop Coop,” Blaine groaned, steadily getting darker in colour, “you really don’t need to do the whole ‘embarrassing big brother’ thing.”

“Oh I don’t know, I’m not complaining,” Sebastian teased in response. Across the table Cooper barked out a laugh, eyes still somewhat flickering between the two of them with a look of something that felt a bit like curiosity. 

“Hey squirt, do you think you could grab us some water from inside?” the older Anderson brother suddenly asked, eyebrows raised and face fixed in a way that meant he was absolutely not taking no for an answer. Blaine’s features twisted into confusion and looked like he was about to complain, but was clearly used to taking orders from his brother so silently got up. Sebastian didn’t like that. 

Blaine gave him one final look that was very obviously a ‘best behaviour’ instruction before heading off, casting a few glances over his shoulder. 

As soon as he was out of earshot Sebastian felt a jab in his chest as Cooper pointed directly into his sternum, leaning over the table. “Hey what the fuck-”

“-You like my baby bro,” the older brother demanded, not a question but a statement. “You are  _ clearly _ not a seasoned actor like I am because it’s all over your face, no control or theatrical techniques in use.”

Sebastian blinked a few times, pushing the hand on him away and frowning, not appreciating being randomly fucking assaulted by a borderline stranger. “Sorry? We literally just met, don't psychoanalyse me just because you happen to be a few years older and hot.” He guessed his feelings for Blaine were getting a little out of hand if someone could detect them within about a minute, which wasn’t the best sign. 

Cooper held up his hands in mock surrender, pushing away from being over the table and softening his features a little. “Woah buddy, hold back with the attack, I’m just saying what’s obvious. And I’m getting good vibes from you, a good aura, so I’m not complaining.”

“Well, who cares what I feel? He’s married to Hummel anyway,” Sebastian muttered with a roll of the eyes, craning his neck to make sure Blaine wasn’t coming back yet. “And you don’t seem to be too invested in his personal life seeing as you two never talk or hang out, like ever.”

“I could say the same thing about Blaine and Kurt,” Cooper immediately fired back, eyes narrowing. “I know my baby bro and he’s not happy, all I’ve got from their relationship so far is that Kurt is applying to that tacky New York school and that’s all he cares about, and Squirt can’t get a word in edgeways.” 

The dismissal of Hummel came a bit from nowhere, Sebastian sort of presuming that Kurt’s obvious infatuation with the older Anderson would have meant he would have adored him. But seemingly having his younger brother’s boyfriend fawn over him didn’t go down as well as he had thought.

“And I know that me and Blaine aren’t super close, but you know, that’s one of the reasons I’m here, to get to know him a bit.” Cooper seemed genuine enough, but Sebastian wasn’t going to take his word 100% at face value, not until he knew more. Blaine’s reluctance to talk about him meant a lot, so there was clearly some deeper stuff going on. 

He kicked his legs out under the table and gave a slow nod. “Ok, well, good for you two. He deserves that.” Sebastian bit the inside of his cheek a little and dwelled on his next statement before continuing. “And about Hummel… He won’t listen, but it’s his life, his choices to make, not our business to get involved with it.”

Cooper raised an eyebrow as a challenge, looking over his shoulder quickly to keep an eye out. “Isn’t it our business for him to be happy? I’m not saying you should you know, make him commit  _ adultery _ god forbid-”

“-Who the fuck still says  _ adultery _ ?-”

“-But I can’t see them lasting,” the elder Anderson said pointedly, hands on the table. “So just, wait your turn tiger.”

Sebastian had no idea what to make of that, or how to respond to this slightly insane person acting like some kind of Yoda to him about his younger brother’s dating life, but before he could respond he saw Blaine heading back over, reentering earshot, so swiftly kicked Cooper under the table to alert him. 

“So when I ran into Tarantino I just said ‘maybe less feet next time bro!’, and he got his security to kick me out!” Cooper yelled out obnoxiously, apparently in the guise of feigning a previous conversation that really just drew more attention to the fact they had definitely been speaking about something they shouldn't have. “Oh hey squirt!”

Blaine looked suspiciously between the two of them as he settled back down, handing over a bottle of water to his brother with a little force. “You know what, I don’t even want to know what you were talking about. This is a horrible combination of people.” 

“Rude and inaccurate and-”

“-Completely true and I hate every second of it,” the shorter boy continued waving Cooper off with closed eyes. “Look, glee club is soon and since you’re now apparently coming I’ll give you the rest of the tour now so we can leave straight after ok?”

And apparently Cooper was coming to glee club. That was interesting. The Anderson brothers exchanged a look which made no sense to Sebastian but was probably just some sibling thing where they speak without speaking, and stood up together to leave. 

“Well it was nice to meet you Sebastian, guess I’ll see you in rehearsal,” Cooper announced as he stood, for some reason adding an exaggerated wink at the end. This guy was dumb. 

“Yeah, whatever,” he replied with a dismissive tone as Blaine dragged his brother off, casting a quick look back at Sebastian on the table but clearly eager to get them away as soon as possible. 

He wasn’t too sure what to make of Cooper. The older Anderson seemed ok enough, clearly a bit vacant in the head and someone to think with his dick rather than his brain, but Sebastian could tell he did care about Blaine at least, even if he maybe didn’t have the best ways of showing it. 

And it was obvious he didn’t care for Kurt either, which was interesting, and it almost sounded like he supported whatever Sebastian was feeling for his brother, which he really wasn’t sure what to do with. Things between him and Blaine were still weird, and even though his usual tactic was to just pretend that everything was normal and brush off anything which could be deemed as uncomfortable, Sebastian did actually want to clear the air. Or talk. Or do anything. 

With Cooper around though, that didn’t seem like it was going to be an easy feat.

~

Seeing the two of them together in glee club, Sebastian definitely could see why Blaine had issues with his sibling. 

One on one, Cooper was irritating, but certainly manageable. In front of a whole room though, his personality just grew enormously, which seemingly meant degrading Blaine in the process. And Sebastian genuinely didn’t think that the older brother meant it, or meant it in a way to humiliate Blaine anyway, but that doesn’t mean that wasn’t the eventual effect.

The performance was great though, and it clearly wasn’t just good looks that ran in the family when they sang and danced like that, but Sebastian did still always find himself gravitating towards Blaine. It wasn’t that Cooper was  _ bad _ , because he objectively wasn’t, but unlike everyone else in the room (including Blaine’s boyfriend) who seemingly forgot the younger Anderson existed, there wasn’t anything he could do which could distract Sebastian from the other. 

There was clear tension between the two, tension which Cooper looked completely oblivious to, but before he could dwell on it anymore their performance was over and glee was over, people sweeping out of the room and both Anderson’s leaving amongst it. 

Sebastian reminded himself that it wasn’t his problem, that it had literally nothing to do with him, especially seeing as he and Blaine hadn’t even spoken since the party. 

But it was hard not to make it his problem when the next day he saw the shorter boy storm out of the school and into the carpark, where he was currently by his own car about to leave. 

He remembered that that afternoon was the acting masterclass which Cooper was running - something which Sebastian had taken a hard pass out of due to a, not wanting a career even slightly related to the arts, and b, the fact that Cooper was a fucking awful actor. 

Everybody else had clambered to attend though, apparently including Blaine who probably went out of some begrudging obligation. Currently though, he was very much walking away from the school and almost crashed right into him, jaw set and rigid, his face brimming with anger but also an underlying hurt,

“Watch out killer, gonna run someone over with those legs if you’re not careful.” Sebastian stepped out in front of him from where he had been next to his car, cutting off the warpath that Blaine was currently set on. He stopped abruptly at Sebastian’s comment and looked up, some of that tension melting but a clear build up of frustration still lingering. “You ok?”

“M’fine,” Blaine mumbled, jaw clenching as he spoke, staring in the opposite direction of the school as if trying to put as much distance between himself and it as possible. “Just going to drive home, forget about today.”

“Do you think driving is a good idea when you look about ten seconds away from combusting?” Sebastian asked with a raised eyebrow. That didn’t go down well, Blaine turning his glare onto him now, fists clenched by his side. 

“I’m sorry, what’s it to you? Since when do you actually care about me?” he spat out, and yeah ok, Sebastian knew they had a lot of unresolved shit going on right now but he could also tell this was not about him, not all anyway. 

He sighed and moved to his car, opening the passenger door and gesturing at the seat. “Get in, don’t worry I’m not going to drive off anywhere, just get in and sit.” 

“I’m sorry?-”

“-Apology accepted now sit down in the car and let’s talk,” Sebastian replied quickly, giving a light push on his shoulder before moving round to his own side. It was clear Blaine wasn’t in the best mental state to be alone right now, let alone driving home, and the shorter boy seemed resigned to agree by the way he exhaled heavily and slid into the seat, door slamming loudly. 

“Now I’m guessing things aren’t going well with your brother?”

Blaine scoffed and slumped back, head falling against the headrest with a soft thud. “You could say that again,” he mumbled, barely audible. “It’s just, every single thing I do he seems to belittle me. Like, he just thinks he’s so much better and there’s  _ nothing _ I can ever do that’s good enough, everything is criticised and shamed.”

Sebastian didn’t have any siblings, but he had parents who were sounding pretty similar to the description he was getting right now, so he got it. Blaine’s voice cracked as he spoke, staring directly up as if scared looking down would make tears spill, swallowing hard. 

“I’ve spent my whole life in his shadow, and I thought maybe this time it would be different, but it’s always the same.”

“B, look, you know I’d be the first person to call him out, say everything he’s done wrong, I’m not exactly afraid of being mean,” Sebastian started, trying to figure out what to say as he spoke. “Because I’m not gonna lie, your brother seems like a bit of a dick.” 

Blaine huffed out a small laugh at that, at least.

“But I do, honestly think, that he wants to be your friend, or your brother, or something. He might be arrogant and irritating, and can’t act to save his life, but he cares about you.”

“Well he’s got a shit way of showing it then,” the curly haired boy replied, sitting up slightly in his seat to turn his gaze to Sebastian. “I don’t care if he doesn’t mean it, it still hurts me, still humiliates me in front of other people.”

Sebastian held up his hands in defense, giving a small nod and surrender. “No no I know, and I promise I’m not trying to invalidate you B, just, I don’t know, give you hope? Talk to him, let him know how shit he makes you feel, don’t be afraid to speak your mind, yeah?”

Those words seemed to do something, as Blaine’s shoulders deflated a little and he sighed, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. “Yeah, I… ok. You’re right. God he just works me up like no one else.” He looked up at Sebastian and paused for a second, before adding almost shyly, “well, maybe a close second to you.”

“Oh really? What an honour,” he retorted dryly, as apparently their conversation had taken the inevitable turn towards themselves. “What could I have possibly done to earn this title.”

Blaine fixed him with a  _ bitch please _ stare, shifting in his seat so that now he was fully facing him. “I haven’t forgotten about the party Seb, I don’t know what kind of joke you were playing but it wasn’t funny, ok?”

He crossed his arms defensively and settled back into his seat, replying, “well good thing it wasn’t meant to be a joke then isn’t it?” There was a slight pause between them, a sort of standoff until Sebastian relented. “I’m sorry, I know that probably crossed a line and-”

“-Are you and Sam dating?”

Blaine’s interruption completely cut him off, the words spilling out of them as if he’d been physically keeping them in for days. He felt himself blink a few times, at first thinking this was some weird attempt at humour Blaine was trying out, but looking at his face it was perfectly clear that no, he was serious.

“Jesus Anderson no, no we’re not dating. Is this because of spin the bottle? Because you see the whole  _ point _ of that game is that it’s not our choice-”

“-Yeah ok but you  _ chose _ to porographically make out!” Blaine interrupted suddenly, tucking one leg beneath him. “And you want to Sugar’s stupid party together, and you  _ live _ together-”

“-because he’s literally homeless-”

“-And he’s hot so like it would make  _ sense _ , you’re always together.”

Blaine tilted his head and stared, demanding an answer with his eyes looking angry for some reason, enraged at the thought that Sebastian and Sam would be dating.

“We’re friends Blaine, we hang out. And we live together, so we hang out. The kiss was…” he trailed off, not wanting to say anything about Sam’s sexuality when it wasn’t his place, trying to find the words to say. “We were both drunk, and probably just horny, and a kiss is a kiss you know? Doesn’t mean it meant anything.”

The shorter boy clenched his jaw and stared out the windscreen, suddenly looking very small tucked in the passenger seat. “So when you’re drunk you do things you don’t mean?” 

Sebastian shrugged, the car feeling more claustrophobic than it had done before. And it was a big car. “I guess, sometimes. Not always though.” Their eyes met briefly, seats close together and space small, and Sebastian wondered why he was here and not Kurt. 

“Are you ok to drive home now?” he asked, settling back into his seat. “I can give you a lift home if you want, Sam has practice after school.”

Blaine bit the inside of cheek and cast his eyes downwards, giving a slight shake of the head. “No it’s fine, I’ll drive, need to take my car anyway. Thank you though… for what you said about Coop.”

“I meant it B,” Sebastian returned softly, allowing himself a final look. “You deserve better than what he’s giving you, but I think if you speak to him, he may give it. The idiot cares.”

They shared a grateful smile, Blaine lingering for a while as if wanting to say something extra, Sebastian internally begging he didn’t because he couldn’t take this anymore. Thankfully Blaine gave a small “thanks” again, before slipping out the car and making his way over to his own, leaving him there with white knuckles on the wheel. 

Giving advice, being friendly, almost a shoulder to cry on, that wasn’t Sebastian’s job, wasn’t what he was supposed to be doing. And it got harder and harder with every passing moment as things between him and Blaine got weirder, and a growing sense of guilt started spreading. 

Sure, he didn’t actually like Kurt, that was plain and simple. But there was something undeniable going on between him and Blaine, even if nothing was acted upon, or even  _ said _ \- apart from his slip up at the party - but it was there. 

Blaine had never flirted really, done anything untoward, but Sebastian’s presence in his life was nothing purely platonic, even if nothing had happened. They shared too much confidence and vulnerability with one another, Sebastian often being the one he came to to pick up the pieces or offer help, Kurt preoccupied with plans for next year and New York and his future life. 

Which yeah, he should be - he should have started that shit the year before and been done by now, but even if it was irritating to admit Hummel had every right to think about his future. He didn’t have the right to neglect Blaine however, as all it meant was that the shorter boy turned to Sebastian to fill that void, and he didn’t realise how much it hurt him to have to do that, not when he felt the way he did. 

He tightened his grip on the wheel and shook his head out, not needing to be in that headspace. Igniting his engine, Sebastian started pulling out of the car park, setting off home to hopefully bury his head in work and start looking at his own college plans, starting some application drafts. 

The only thing he could think about as he left was how jealous Blaine had sounded when talking about Sam, and how much he hated how happy it made him.

~

**Blaine Anderson**

can you meet me in the choir room?? want to discuss some music!!

Sebastian had received the text from Blaine in the middle of his math class, shooting back a message saying he’d be there in 15. He wasn’t really sure what music he could be talking about, seeing as they hadn’t had glee club yet this week, so there was no assignment, but headed to the choir room after class nonetheless. 

After their chat in the car last week things seemed to have gotten better between Blaine and Cooper, the older Anderson staying for a few more days before having to head back to L.A. In that time Sebastian noticed Blaine being  _ way _ less high strung than he had been. He’d even gotten a few thank you texts after Cooper’s departure from the shorter boy, saying their chat had really helped, so, his good samaritan act of the week was done. 

He made his way through the school to the choir room, pushing through the door to see Blaine standing by the piano, humming away and tapping a pencil on the surface. 

“Let me guess, planning a public serenade? Hopefully for your boyfriend this time and not a random retail worker.”

Sebastian’s voice made Blaine look up, a wide smile on his face at his entrance but then quickly replaced with an embarrassed scrunch of the nose. “How do you even know about that? It was with the Warblers,” he groaned, cheeks colouring. 

“Well Kurt told Mercedes who told Tina who told Santana who told me,” Sebastian replied with a cheeky grin, enjoying seeing Blaine squirm a little. “I mean I’m sorry we can’t all be as fun and promiscuous as you, Mr keep-your-toys-in-the-drawer-tonight Anderson-”

“-Oh my god please stop!” Blaine whined, walking over to the seats and flopping down. “Can we talk about my sophomore humiliation later please? I have a fun idea for Nationals!” 

The topic of Nationals did grab Sebastian’s attention at least, glad someone else was taking an interest in their upcoming competition, so he smiled and waved off his prior teasing to go and sit down by Blaine. 

As he did, Mike came into the choir room as well, waving over at the two of them but clearly knowing the same amount that Sebastian did from the slightly confused look on his face. 

“Hey guys, uh, why did you want me again Blaine?”

The shorter boy tucked his legs under himself and grinned, flickering his eyes between himself and Mike, who had come over to sit with them. “Well, the theme this year is ‘vintage’, and I thought, wouldn’t it be so fun to do a disco number! I mean what’s more vintage than disco?”

Sebastian and Mike immediately shared a look between them, raised eyebrows and wide eyes. 

“Uh, disco? Really?” Mike said slowly, turning back to Blaine tentatively. The shorter boy crossed his arms defensively, furrowing his brow at the two of them.

“Uh, yeah, really,” he replied with some bite. “Look, I’m not saying we  _ have _ to do it for the competition, but it would really get people in the mood, get some inspiration flowing, and would be fun! That’s why I asked you two, cos you’re the best dancers, and disco is all about dance!”

Admittedly, he and Mike were by far the best dancers - well, with the exception of Brittney, and the casual compliment was definitely working in Blaine’s favour here. “What did you have in mind? I don’t want to publicly make a dick of myself Anderson.”

He was waved off, Blaine looking a little happier now he was getting a better response, leaning in further. “Don’t worry! You two would do more of the dancing, and can make that what you like, so we could do ‘You Should Be Dancing’? At glee club on Wednesday?”

Sebastian had to agree that song wasn’t awful, and could definitely see Blaine being able to pull it off, better than anyone else anyway. And after the last week and his experience feeling defeated and shot down by his brother, he probably needed a bit of a boost, which Sebastian knew this would give him. 

He nodded at Mike, who had seemingly come to the same thought process as he had done, his expression a little softer than the initial visible distaste towards disco. 

“Alright, let’s get to work on choreography then.”

Blaine’s grin made it worth it. 

~

Blaine’s grin decidedly did not make it worth it when after their performance he ended up cornered by Schuester who asked him to help out with  _ another _ disco performance alongside himself and Blaine, which he for some reason wound up agreeing to. He wouldn’t readily admit it, but he really did enjoy dancing alongside the shorter boy, the two of them moving in sync and just generally having fun. Even if it was disco.

The actual concept was not readily received by their peers, a shout of “disco sucks” ringing out across the auditorium which was in very poor taste after their frankly excellent performance, which included a toe touch by Blaine that made Sebastian nearly fall over on the spot.

His ass really didn’t need much help to look good, but that really did do fucking wonders. 

Turns out Schuester and Coach Sue had decided to go all out for their number, including a huge plexi-glass dance floor because that was a perfectly sane thing for a person to own. 

He and Blaine made their way up there to help kick things off, getting a wolf whistle from Santana and a glare from Hummel in the process, which did make things more entertaining. Everyone did eventually join in though, showing off their rather depressing range of dance moves that just made him get more pessimistic about Nationals. 

Clearly Schuester had a plan however, announcing Santana, Mercedes and Finn as the winner of their stupid little competition, when Hudson had looked like he was trying to put on a faulty seatbelt whilst having trapped gas. 

After the glee rehearsal he had soccer, a welcome break from having to hang out with all the show choir kids and see his other friends again, the guys who played still falling somewhat on the jock spectrum but not being as meatheaded as football players. He still refused to wear his letterman though. 

Out on the field, Sebastian was finishing up the training, just joking around with Zach who played midfield, when he spotted the Cheerios on the other side of the grass, looking like they were ending practice as well.

He excused himself from Zach, walking over to where he saw Santana probably frightening some freshman cheerleaders.

“You get a pep talk about your future yet? Schuester wasn’t exactly subtle about the whole thing was he,” Sebastian saddled up next to her, glaring at the other girls to leave them alone as they sat on the adjacent bleachers. 

Santana rolled her eyes and leaned back a little, elbows propped up on the back of the seats. “Ugh, he said it’s his way of trying to get us to tell him what we’re going to do with our lives, he thinks we’re unmotivated or whatever. It’s like he thinks just because we’re not putting on sparkly socks and tacky hats and rushing off to New York we  _ clearly _ don’t know what we’re doing.”

She had a point - it was so Broadway focused in there that most other things were swept aside, when frankly not everyone wanted to do that, even if they were interested in the arts. However, he and Santana had never actually spoken about her future, or what her plans were post high school, so although he would  _ never  _ agree with Schuester, he was curious to know what she was thinking. 

“True, he does only have the capacity to think about Berry and Hummel’s careers,” he said with a small nod, “but what are you gonna do when you leave? Never really spoken about it.”

“Get famous,” Santana shrugged casually. She stared out across the field at the cheerleaders, the sea of red and white starting to stream back into the school. Something akin to wistfulness was on her face. “Get out of here, out of Ohio. Wait for Britt to graduate so we can be together, anywhere else. Ideally somewhere we can hold hands in public, if that place exists.”

He got it, he really did. Fame and money were broad targets, something to dream of, aspire to. But safety and security as well? Living a life where you didn’t have the risk of being assaulted or attacked for just existing, able to express love and affection for someone without looking over your shoulder or having that familiar trickle of dread seep down your spine?

Even for people like himself and Santana, those who present themselves confidently and carefree, that was something which was a real dream, one harder to say out loud than just wanting money. 

“Yeah, that sounds nice.” Sebastian followed her stare out to the last remaining cheerleaders practicing. “College? Job? What you thinking?”

“Sorry Smythe I didn’t realise you were my fucking dad, what’s with all the questions?” she snapped back, turning to face him, defensively posed. “First Schuester now you, why does everyone care so much about my life?”

He narrowed his eyes at her, not sure where the sudden outburst had come from but not used to being the victim of her verbal assaults. “Well sorry for being curious, you do realise you’re graduating soon right? Guess  _ I’m _ the dick for asking what you’re doing with yourself.”

Santana stood up quickly and wrapped her cheerleading jacket around herself, ponytail swishing in perfect accompaniment to her movement. “Yeah, you are the dick.” With that she stormed off across the field, following the prior girls back into the changing rooms leaving Sebastian on the bleachers. 

Her shift in mood was so sudden, and a tone not used on him since they first met months ago. Sebastian heard Zach call him back over to the rest of the team to head to their locker rooms, giving a gesture of acknowledgement but still somewhat distracted. 

Honestly, he gathered it was some sense of defensiveness, probably a deflection of some sort over maybe just not knowing what she was going to do, but Sebastian would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little hurt, thinking they had the type of relationship where she could be honest about that. Santana was guarded though, only ever fully vulnerable around Britt, and even then could be closed off at times. 

He tried to not let it bother him as he headed to the changing rooms.

~

The rest of the week started to pass; Mercedes performed in glee club, yet again blowing everyone else out the water and making Mr Schue seem like an idiot for not utilising her for three years. Sebastian was pretty sure Sam recorded the whole thing, as he was clearly still not over her, in any way shape or form. It was somewhat sweet. 

Santana seemed to be busy the next few days, and he didn’t even really  _ see _ her until she sang for them, her performance of ‘If I Can’t Have You’ undeniably good, only tainted at the end by their teacher thinking it meant she was going to be a lawyer. Sebastian may not have known what she was going to do, but he wasn’t that much of an idiot. 

However it seemed that Brittney took her own interpretation of the song, and went ahead and did something that was definitely not what Santana had meant. 

Sebastian heard about the sex tape from some idiot sopohmore in the hallway, talking crassly about the couple in front of his idiot friends. He stopped to swear at them before heading off to try and find Santana, searching through different classrooms before finally making it to the auditorium, where she was sitting alone on the side of the stage. 

Unlike the last time out on the bleachers, she wasn’t rigid and defensive, but with slumped shoulders and a pensive expression, staring out at the empty rows of seats in front of her. He wordlessly approached and sat down next to her, a few inches apart so they weren’t touching but were within reach if needed to be. 

Sebastian let a few seconds pass in silence before deciding to speak up. “I think she thought she was doing the right thing you know.”

Brittney and himself had never exactly been close, not having too much to talk about, but he liked the girl a lot, and knew she wouldn't have any ill intent, especially regarding Santana. 

“No I know, she said she wanted to help, wanted to help make me famous as that’s what I want,” she replied softly, twisting her hands together. “Britt didn’t know that wasn’t what I meant, but I mean it was what I said wasn’t it? That I would do whatever it takes?”

“Tana,” Sebastian sighed out as he knocked their ankles against one another, “the video was taken down pretty fast, and you guys are still in school so I’m sure there’ll be minimal damage, I can get my dad involved if you like, get him to-”

“-No, don’t,” she cut in swiftly, “in terms of the video, I’m pretty sure everything’s been done that can be. Obviously these things never fully go away, but it’s the best that it can. I’m not annoyed at Britt, not really, when she really only wanted to make me happy. It’s that she thought that’s what  _ would _ make me happy you know?”

He hummed, knowing what she meant but also knowing she shouldn’t put all the blame on herself. Brittney wasn’t an easy person to be mad at, when she usually had such good intentions and such a sweetheart, but Sebastian knew Santana shouldn’t be pushing all of this onto herself. 

“I get that, but this isn’t your fault, it’s ok if you don’t know what to do you know? You’re still young and there’s still options, especially for someone like you who is not just smart, but on a nationally renowned cheerleading team and a somewhat good show choir. You got it all Tana, don’t put yourself down.”

Next to him she bumped their shoulders together, giving a light hearted scoff. “I know I got it all Smythe, I get to look at myself in the mirror you know?” Santana gave him a slight smile, some of that earlier anxiety melted away. “I just want to get out of here so bad, sometimes I forget there’s actual steps to doing that.”

“Look, this isn’t advice I would usually give, but maybe talk to Coach Sylvester?” Sebastian suggested after a slight pause. Sue wasn’t exactly, uh, stable, but there was no denying not only her connections but also her fondness for Santana, so there was no doubt she might be useful. 

Santana thought so too apparently from the look she gave, replying, “Yeah you’re right, she might be a psychotic bitch sometimes but the woman’s smart I’ll give her that. Sometimes your brain does work, I guess.”

He swatted her arm at the cheeky comment but was glad to see her more back to her old self, and more importantly not yelling at him anymore. “More than yours does, and I’m a whole year younger so don’t get cocky.” They stood up from the stage together and Sebastian groaned after reminding himself she was graduating soon, and he was stuck there for another year.

“I can’t believe you’re leaving me, it’s actually a hate crime,” he moaned, letting her drag him across the stage. “At least Berry and Hummel are going too, if I was left with them I think I might have to fake my own death and go to Paris.”

Santana waggled her eyebrows at him, tugging on his sleeve as she pulled them out towards the exit walking backwards. “When Hummel leaves are you gonna swoop in? I don’t think that couple is really cut out for long distance when they’re struggling in the same school, you could shoot your shot.”

He waved her off, but the idea wasn’t rid of that easily. Sebastian would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about it, the fact that next year the one thing between him and Blaine wouldn’t be there. 

The issue was, if anything happened between them, Blaine would hate him forever, as well as probably lapse into some self hatred spiral. Their whole friendship would be gone forever, and all he would do was serve as a reminder for him fucking up his relationship. 

Santana eyed him expectantly as they pushed out into the corridor, arms linked as they moved. 

“Forget it Lopez, I’m not gonna be the walking embodiment of Blaine’s failed relationship, you realise he would literally never look at me again, right?” She made a noise of agreement, biting her lip in thought as they made their way down the hall. 

“Yeah, if he cheats with you. But if they break up, then there really is nothing stopping you but your own fear of commitment, think about that.” 

With that comment she tossed him a wink and a cheeky look, unlinking their arms to make her way to her next class. Sebastian couldn’t think of anything rude to say in return, not when she was nothing but correct. 

The probability that Blaine and Kurt would split up next year was frankly, very high. They didn’t seem to be communicating much right now when they were at the same school, both of them not really acting as they should. Hummel was so obsessed about next year it was as if he forgot he had a boyfriend, so in turn Blaine seemed to be talking to Sebastian about everything instead, which probably wasn’t ideal. 

If they did split up, he knew that everyone expected him and Blaine to be an inevitability, themselves included. But Santana was right, relationships weren’t really his thing. Commitment and monogamy and romance, all of that. And that was all stuff Blaine deserved and needed, so where did that leave him?

All he knew was that the likelihood of having to make that decision was becoming more and more probable, and although he knew how he felt, and what he wanted without a doubt in his mind, Sebastian wasn’t sure if he could actually do it.

~

The following day he found himself working in the library, starting with homework but moving onto looking at colleges and applications, the general air of the future going around the glee club at the minute motivating him. 

Sebastian couldn’t believe the lack of preparation from McKinley students, seniors only now deciding on what they want to do, the majority of them not even having a plan. Only Mike and Quinn seemed to have actual college plans which were certain - he wasn’t counting Rachel and Kurt because they had thought Julliad had a theatre program up until a few months ago, and hadn’t even auditioned for NYADA yet. Also he didn’t like them. 

About half an hour into his research into Ivy League Law programs, a stack of books was placed down next to him as Blaine flopped into the seat, groaning at his pile of homework. 

“It’s nowhere near the amount at Dalton, but it’s still effort to keep up with,” the shorter boy moaned as he opened up a textbook, scrunching up his nose adorably at the pages. “I hate math.”

“You’re nearly the top of the class,” Sebastian deadpanned back, raising an eyebrow. “Artie and Tina are above you but you’re also beating them in most other classes.”

“And you’re tied with me most the time, and you also complain about work, so pipe down.” Blaine playfully rolled his eyes and smiled, peering over to see what he was doing. “College research? I probably shouldn’t be surprised you’re looking at it already, I was going to start in the next few weeks too.”

Sebastian turned his laptop screen a little so Blaine could see, happy to be talking to someone who seemed to take this as seriously as he did. “Yeah, I’m pretty dead set on law, just thinking about where I want to be really. My dad’s a Harvard alum, so I don’t want to go there, don’t want to just get in as a legacy. Plus it’ll probably piss him off.”

Blaine smiled and nodded, understanding what he meant. Even if the Anderson’s probably weren’t as stupidly well off as his family was, he understood the whole idea of heritage and legacies and how rich parents liked their kids to go to their universities, probably seeing it a lot at Dalton. Sebastian knew it would be easier to get into Harvard, but he was already advantaged in many other ways as well as being academic, athletic, and musical, so honestly he wasn’t ridiculously worried. 

“Well I’m sure you’ll find somewhere you like, plenty of time to look! I can’t wait to go to New York,” Blaine sighed, with a look so dreamy it was almost comical, chin resting on his hand. 

“You’re decided on New York then?” Sebastian was somewhat surprised to know he’d already made his mind up so soon, but did have a bit of a shit feeling as to why. “A pretty big place, you looking at any schools in particular or-”

“-NYADA of course,” Blaine instantly replied, giving him a funny look, “where else would I go?” 

He stared over at the shorter boy for a moment, not seeing a flicker of hesitation on his face. “Uh, anywhere? Come on killer, you can’t pin everything on one school when you haven’t explored your options even a little bit.” Sebastian knew that Blaine could sometimes be a little, intensely focused on things, go all in without thinking it all the way through, but this was a little ridiculous. 

“Are you going because you want to, or because Kurt’s going?” he challenged, turning to properly face Blaine. “Because you can’t build your whole entire life around your high school boyfriend. That’s beyond insane.”

That was clearly the wrong thing to say as Blaine instantly got defensive, jaw clenching and slamming the book in front of him shut. “It’s not  _ insane _ to plan things Sebastian - I want to perform and NYADA is a great school, and me and Kurt can get an apartment and live together and start our lives. Together. It’s called planning, and thinking ahead, and having  _ goals _ .”

“Well, what if he doesn’t get in? What if you don’t want to be on Broadway, what if he doesn’t go to New York?” Sebastian could hardly believe he was having to say all these things, thinking they were just rational thoughts that would have gone across anyone’s head.

Because Blaine was smart - he was fucking intellegent across the board, that was certain. But he could just get his head stuck in certain ways and certain ideas and be way too stubborn to contemplate the fact they may not be perfect.

“You don’t get it, ok!” the shorter boy said back a little too loudly for the library. “I moved schools to be with him, why wouldn’t I want to plan my future with him! What would be the point of doing that if we’re not together, there would be none.” Blaine breathed out shakily, stuffing his books back into his satchel and avoiding Sebastian’s eyes deliberately. 

“We’re going to work out, because we have to. Because otherwise I changed my whole life for nothing.”

Sebastian opened his mouth to respond but was shushed by the librarian, finger aggressively on her lips and staring at the two of them. Blaine whispered an apology but used her intrusion as a distraction, slipping away from their table and out of the room without glancing back. 

It all started to make sense to him, some of the confusion which had been running through his mind non stop the last few days, weeks,  _ months _ , lifting. Blaine and Kurt’s relationship had seemed somewhat strained, both of them clinging on to their comfort blanket because it’s what they knew, and Sebastian could admit, they got on well, and cared deeply for one another. 

But Blaine uprooted his whole life for his boyfriend, so if they weren’t together, what would he have done that for? Sebastian wished he could just grab him, shake his shoulders, yell that he’s here now and he’s achieved a lot for  _ himself _ , has friends and a community and it’s not all awful. He has Tina and Sam and Brittney and was the lead in the musical, above a 4.0 GPA. 

He has Sebastian. 

Not that he can think about that. 

It was Blaine’s life, Blaine’s future, and it wasn’t his place to get involved. Sebastian just had the horrible vision of him and Kurt together, not happy, both of them dragging each other down when they could be so much better off apart, because as much as he didn’t like Hummel, the relationship wasn’t good for him either. 

Sebastian exhaled deeply, turning back to his laptop and the open page on Stanford, thinking about his own future. He was like Santana, wanting to get as far away as possible, escape this place he’d been trapped in for far too long already. 

He just didn’t know for how much longer he could stand to watch the trainwreck of a relationship keep going, but didn’t know what to do to stop it. 

~

Disco week dragged on, Sebastian thankfully not having to get involved in any other performances until the last one 

He did have to suffer through all the glee couples dancing together in front of them, Hudson singing away as everyone else swayed in each other’s arms, dreamy eyes and loving smiles, making him feel sick. Santana and Brittney seemed great at least, and Blaine and Kurt did look happy. He wondered if they felt it. 

One evening Sam burst into his bedroom to inform him  _ very _ excitedly that he and Mercedes had kissed, giving a shout and air fist pump so aggressive Sebastian thought he might pass out, but the blond ran out again straight to his own room, probably to do a lot more celebrating that he hoped he wouldn't be able to hear.

Apart from that, the only positive of the week was hearing from Santana that through Sue she had gotten into the university of Louisville with a cheerleading scholarship, so was one step closer to figuring out what she wanted to do, and could get a college education whilst she did it. 

Of course, the good news could only last so long. 

He really thought that Nationals prep would be more intensive than ever right about now, but no, they had to take a whole week out for Whitney Housten. 

Sebastian understood it, to an extent. He loved music, had a wide range of tastes and understood the significance of artists. And Whitney was undoubtedly one of the best, ever. But they also had Nationals coming up alarmingly soon, so why couldn’t they have just done a day or so? 

There was no way anyone’s mind was changing though, not with the biggest divas of the group on the side of Whitney, so it looked like this week was for her and her only. 

Schuester announced it in the first glee club rehearsal of the week, saying it was going to be their way of saying goodbye to her, and also each other and the high school. Sebastian guessed that made sense, with such a large portion of the club leaving, but it still did leave them all distracted for their upcoming competition. 

He walked past Kurt and Blaine in the corridor, the latter looking a little deflated and clearly not right, Hummel not seeming to notice. Sebastian only caught the words NYADA and sheet music, but gathered what they were talking about easily. 

It was hard, he really didn’t want to get involved, but when he met Sam outside to drive home he couldn’t help it. 

“Do you wanna go to the Lima Bean?” he asked the blond, fishing his phone out his pocket. “I was thinking of asking Blaine, he looked about 10 seconds away from crying in the bathroom earlier.”

Sam shrugged and nodded from where he’d been leaning against Sebastian’s car, replying “sure thing, would rather not do any work anyway, was probably just going to play COD at home.” He tapped the top of the car and headed over to the passenger side, turning to give him a wink before adding “you’re buying though.”

“You literally live in my house for free dickbag,” Sebastian deadpanned, but they both knew he had no problem with it. 

He unlocked his phone, finding Blaine’s name and quickly sending a text;  _ lima bean? me and evans are going we’ll save you a spot _

After a few seconds a response came through immediately, a casual agreement which Sebastian knew was more enthusiastic than it sounded from the speed of the reply, which settled warmly inside him. 

Slipping into the driver's seat he tossed his bag into the back, flicking Sam’s leg to get him to take his feet off the dash and started up the engine. “Blaine’s gonna meet us there, he’s just finishing up something in the library.”

“This is pretty nice of you dude, is everything ok? 

Sebastian turned his head to stare at Sam with his eyebrows raised, not detecting any sarcasm in his voice. Fucking  _ rude _ , he could be nice when he wanted to. 

“Don’t be an asshole, it’s not as if I fucking wrote a song about him or something, I literally just asked if he wanted to get coffee,” he snarked back, only not swatting him with his hands as he was driving and responsible, thank you very much. 

Sam raised his hands in mock surrender, grinning obnoxiously over at him. “Alright alright, I was just  _ saying _ . You once told me to walk home when I asked you to wait an extra 10 minutes after school, so don’t blame me for being curious.”

He rolled his eyes and took a sharp left, thankfully nearing the coffee shop. “I just saw him in the corridor talking to Hummel, and I don’t know, he looked a bit sad, and Kurt was leaving to go somewhere, and I just happened to want coffee, so…” Sebastian trailed off a little and kept his eyes firmly planted on the road. He didn’t need to look at Sam to know what his expression would be. 

“Just talk about making out with Mercedes for half an hour and I’m sure that’ll distract him from whatever’s going on, or will push him over the edge, either way something will happen,” Sebastian added with a cheeky grin, Sam leaning over to poke him. 

What he didn’t add was that Sam talking about Mercedes would also decrease the risk of Blaine getting weirdly jealous again and staring daggers at the blond the whole time if they dared touch each other or something. He was still torn between whether or not he liked that. That was a complete lie; he loved it. 

They pulled up at the Lima Bean and hopped out the car, Sam running in to go and order for the both of them even though he’d have to wait for Sebastian to go in and pay anyway. 

Luckily they found a table in a quiet corner and saw Blaine pull up not long after, waving at them as he pushed into the shop. Sam pointed at the drink they’d gotten for him and beckoned him over, moving his chair around to make more room for the shorter boy when he joined them, who gave a grateful smile as he approached. 

“Hey guys,” he said as he sat down, satchel placed on the floor. “Thanks for getting me a drink, you didn’t have to.”

Sam shrugged and pointed directly at Sebastian, “he bought them all, don't thank me. Rich boy is good for something it seems.” He kicked the blond under the table but it got a laugh out of Blaine which was something at least. 

“You gonna sing anything for Whitney week?” Sebastian asked him, pushing the drink towards his side of the table. Blaine looked a little surprised to be asked the question, eyes widening a little as his brain clearly scrambled to try and think of an answer. 

“Uh, maybe? Honestly I haven’t given it that much thought, especially as it means so much to a lot of the seniors as well.” He figured that meant Kurt, but didn’t want to bring him up or ruin the afternoon, so smiled and turned to Sam, asking the same question.

The blond launched into a word vomit about Whitney and Mercedes and if he should sing something to her, but would that be disrespectful and would he embarrass himself? Or would that be sweet and she’d like it, or would he be booed off stage-

It was a lot. 

It did seem to do the trick however, some of the tension that Blaine carried in with him was lifted, and the three of them found themselves laughing and chatting for a while, a lot of the pressure and intensity of being at school melted away. 

After a while Sam excused himself to go to the bathroom, tripping over his chair as he stood up to go. 

“God he’s a liability,” Sebastian mumbled as the blond walked away, practically crashing into two different customers as he went. “Imagine living with him, it’s like having a dog that’s toilet trained.”

Blaine chuckled as he played with the rim of his now empty cup, staring down at his fingers. There was a slight silence between them before the shorter boy lifted his eyes and offered him a small smile, that didn’t quite reach his eyes. 

“Thanks for inviting me out Seb. I’m not really sure why you did but… I think I needed this. Needed some time away from McKinley, it’s a little intense at the minute,” he admitted quietly, returning his gaze to his cup. “It’s hard, half of everyone getting ready to leave and the rest of us preparing to stay.”

Sebastian nodded, even for him the atmosphere at school was a little weird, even without as many attachments. Mike and Santana were the two people he was going to miss the most, some of his closest friends at the place, but their friendships weren’t based around constant physical contact and talking anyway, not the way a lot of the relationships were. 

“Well, I mean, if you ever need someone to talk to…” Sebastian shrugged casually, not meeting Blaine’s eyes. “A lot of people are going through the same thing, I mean Tina definitely is, I’m sure she could help.”

“Hm,” Blaine replied with a nod, giving him an odd but not unhappy look. “Yeah, yeah I’ll keep that in mind.”

They smiled at each other across the table, cups empty and sun low in the sky, a wash of orange and purple streaming across the Lima Bean. Blaine really did look beautiful in the sun.

“What about you then? Going to sing anything this week?”

Sebastian honestly hadn’t thought about it, not giving too much thought to the week’s assignment when some people clearly cared a lot more. Yeah, he loved Whitney, everyone did, but frequently forgot that in the club about singing, sometimes they were expected to sing. It seemed everyone just did it to advance their own relationships. 

“Oh I don’t know, hadn’t really thought about it to be honest, figured that certain people would be taking up every session doing her whole discography,” Sebastian declared casually, noticing Sam coming back from the restroom. “I’ll think about it.”

“Think about what?” Sam asked as he flopped back down, looking between the two of them. 

Blaine leant back in his chair a little and crossed his arms, legs kicked out. “Singing in glee club - I think he should, I mean you’ve barely done any solo performances this year Seb, and she has enough songs for you to pick from.”

“Oh yeah go on bro sing us a song,” Sam teased with a grin, leaning forwards on his elbows. “Pretty sure I’ve sang more than you have this year.”

“Do you guys not remember me literally performing last week,” he deadpanned in return with a glare at the two gleaming faces in front of him. “Why am I always peer pressured into singing, you guys all suck.”

His moaning did very little to dissuade them, both continuing to tease and laugh until he waved them off and finally agreed, much to both of their delight. 

“Look, I gotta run, have a shit load of work to do, but thanks for this guys, I had a nice time,” Blaine smiled as he picked up his bag, looking at the two of them warmly. 

“Don’t worry about it dude we’ll do it again some time, and can do it all the time next year anyway,” Sam replied with a friendly punch to the arm. The shorter boy nodded, giving one last smile at Sebastian before turning to leave, dropping his cup in the bin on the way out. 

Sam stretched his arms above his head and cracked his back loudly, before giving Sebastian a goofy thumbs up and grin when Blaine was decidedly outside the building. “Well I don’t think we pushed him over the edge, so up top bro!” he exclaimed, holding out a hand.

Sebastain glared at the offending hand for a few seconds before sighing and letting himself high five the blond, hoping no one saw. Blaine really did seem to leave in a better mood to the one he came in, which was frankly all Sebastian could ask for. He wished he could do that for longer than a few hours. 

~

The next glee club practise, he was still mulling over what he should sing for the week when Brittney jumped up and declared her own performance. It probably shouldn’t have been much of a surprise that she sang ‘I Wanna Dance with Somebody’, but it was surprising when she pulled several of them up to dance alongside her. 

Sebastian found himself dragged up in the first chorus and pulled around with her, allowing himself to laugh and yeah, admittedly have fun with the blonde as she just yanked him around the room, letting him lift her up once before tossing him aside and grabbing Mike. 

It was nice to have fun performances, not just the depressing love songs he was expecting from a week dedicated to Whitney Housten’s memory, something that was continued with Santana and Rachel’s number. 

He made a mental note to make fun of Santana later on about basically singing a song about wanting to fuck Berry on the side, but couldn’t deny how good the performance was even if Rachel was in it. 

What was extremely fucking distracting though, was the weird display Hummel was putting on in front of him. Sebastian was sitting in the back with Tina, trying to watch what was going on at the front of the room, but was disturbed from Kurt giggling and gasping at his phone the whole time. 

It clearly wasn’t anything to do with Blaine from the way the shorter boy was sitting to the side, arms crossed and frequently staring over at his boyfriend with hurt eyes, expression downcast for the entire song. 

No one really seemed to notice, both Finn and Brittney recording the performance and grinning at their partners, everyone else too enthralled with what was going on. Sebastian craned his neck to try and look at Kurt’s screen, but annoyingly was too far away and the man in question had it tucked too close to his chest for him to see anything.

He recognised the signs; had been the  _ cause _ of the signs too many times to count, and knew whatever was going on was probably not something he wanted Blaine to know about. Sebastian felt his nails dig into his palms a little, not wanting to jump to conclusions but just unbelievably  _ frustrated _ , knowing Blaine was feeling neglected anyway, and now it wasn’t just cos of New York but someone else as well?

The room erupted in applause after Santana and Rachel finished, Sebastian brushing off some of the anger before standing up to clap as well, although wishing he hadn’t been distracted during it. Before he could pull Kurt to the side and try and question him, he’d run off out the room with Mercedes, arms linked and talking about something else. 

Blaine was a little slower, so Sebastian lightly grabbed his arm to get his attention. 

“Hey, B, you ok?” he asked quickly, brow furrowed with concern. 

The shorter boy shook him off with a shrug, avoiding meeting his eyes and Sebastian had a feeling they were holding back tears from the way he swallowed hard, and voice was thick. 

“I’m fine ok, just leave me alone.”

With that he brushed off Sebastian and strode off, arms wrapped around himself tightly and head down, moving past everyone else without a word. He told himself not to get involved, not to worry about other people’s business, but he just couldn’t help it, not when it was about Blaine. 

Sebastian stormed down the hall until he came across Kurt, who was waving bye to Mercedes at his locker and still giggling down at that stupid fucking  _ phone- _

“-What’s your deal Hummel?”

He stopped directly in front of him and let himself tower over the other boy, one wrong move away from slapping that stupid device out his hand. 

Kurt blinked several times and moved back, slipping his phone into his pocket and narrowing his eyes at him. Sebastian was distinctly reminded about one of their last conversations before Valentine's Day, only this time the roles were reversed and one of them had actually done something. 

“Excuse me?” Kurt replied in confusion, wrapping his arms around himself. “Do you want to be a little more specific or are you just insulting my whole existence again because honestly it’s getting a little dull-”

“-The phone, the texting, the giggling like a 12 year old girl right in  _ front _ of Blaine when it’s clearly nothing to do with him,” Sebastian spat back quickly. At that Kurt’s eyes widened a little, nothing but guilt on his face as he realised he’d been caught out, suddenly finding the ground very interesting. 

“So what, I’m texting? Am I not allowed to have friends now?” 

Sebastian rolled his eyes and took a step closer, closing the space Hummel had put between them. “Don’t play dumb, it’s not a cute look. We both know whoever was sending you those messages is more than interested - god fucking knows why - and you loved it.”

He felt himself getting angrier, and had to exhale to calm down. They were in the corridor, and this was about their private relationship - the last time he’d had a public argument here it had been with Blaine and all his sports teams had made fun of him for fighting with his boyfriend for a week. If anyone called Kurt his boyfriend he’d throw up. 

For a moment, Kurt’s face remained in that guilty, caught in the act expression, mouth opening and closing a few times. But then he looked to the side and his face hardened, jaw clenched before turning back to stare at him with steely eyes. 

“No, you know what?  _ You _ don’t get to say that to me. Not you, who has made it clear for the last few months how into  _ my _ boyfriend you are, how you flirt with him in front of me, making all those suggestive comments.” Sebastian opened his mouth to respond but was instantly cut off. 

“You don’t think I don’t see how he looks at you? How he clearly likes the compliments, goes to you to talk about his problems instead of me?” 

“Because you never give him the time of day!” Sebastian hissed back, prodding Kurt in the chest. “Because you ignore him, only talk about yourself, and are so obviously jealous of everything that he does, it's obscene, don’t blame your shitty relationship on me Hummel.”

They stood there glaring at each other, Sebastian clenching his fists by his side feeling half moons pressing into his palm. His mind was reeling, clouded with red and swirling with rage that he could barely think, and could see several people staring at them, whispering. The last thing he needed right now was to make a scene, so just rolled his eyes and straightened up, giving one last glare before pushing past Kurt and storming out towards the parking lot. 

The thing was, Hummel hadn’t confirmed or denied anything, not really. But the guilt was evident on his face, seeming like he’d been caught right in the middle of the act even if he didn’t know what. 

Sebastian made it outside, the cool air smacking him in the face and calming him a little, allowing himself to stop and breathe. Kurt’s words didn’t stop rattling around his head, what he said about him and Blaine, what he had noticed. 

And he had no right to compare whatever was going on with them to what he was doing, but no matter how hard he tried Sebastian couldn’t help but see his point. A little. A very small amount. Blaine  _ did _ turn to him often, did sometimes look at him in ways he shouldn’t, not hate the flirting as much as he should. 

But he had  _ never _ returned it, always had a constant shame and put separation between himself and Sebastian, and turned him down, reaffirming their relationship as platonic too many times to count, constantly saying his own love for Kurt even if sometimes he didn’t believe it.

He stopped by his car and had the very strong urge to smoke, internally cursing himself for trying to be good and not having any straights on him. The relationship in front of him was a trainwreck, both people reaching out to others to receive validation they weren’t getting from each other, but Sebastian could just feel his heart break for Blaine because he was  _ trying _ . 

Blaine had moved schools, changed his whole life, supported Kurt through everything in the year but still just seemed so alone, left at the sidelines and neglected, and now whatever was going on on top of it. 

Sebastian got in his car, letting his head fall back against the headrest and closing his eyes, exhaling deeply. Ok, he was biased, that was obvious. He could understand Blaine wasn’t exactly innocent, and Sebastian’s presence at the school and in their lives had an impact on their relationship that wasn’t the best. 

No matter what had happened, all that was clear to him now was that both people in that relationship weren’t happy, and were clinging on to something for the sake of comfort and safety. Blaine deserved better, but Sebastian would never say that was him. He knew he wasn’t good enough for him, had accepted that a while ago. He just wanted him to be happy. 

~

Sebastian had radio silence from Blaine all evening, finding himself staring down at the screen as if he should text something but having no idea what to say. He figured if Blaine needed anything, he would tell him, so decided to leave it and wound up playing COD all evening with Sam, even if he was a bit distracted. 

He did however, decide on what he should sing, after scrolling through different Whitney performances for a while, wanting to continue the trend of doing something fun rather than melodramatic and emotional. 

Turning up at glee though, Schuester said that somebody else had already asked to sing that day, so he’d have to wait until a different time to perform as they only had time for one. It was just his luck honestly, half minded to just cancel his number full stop but no, that would be too petty. 

Instead he just grumbled a response out and took to his seat, slotting in between Sam and Mike with a nod and letting his bag fall to the floor, scanning the room for Blaine. The shorter boy was off to the side, further away from Kurt than he usually was and not meeting anyone’s eyes. It was clear something was up. 

Mr. Schue said something, Sebastian wasn’t listening, but then all of a sudden Blaine was standing up and striding towards the front, head held up straight. 

“This is dedicated to anyone who’s ever been cheated on.”

The whole room simultaneously adopted the same expression of shock and confusion, head turning towards Kurt and also himself for some reason, an affronted Hummel declaring, “This is insane! I didn't cheat on you!” 

Brittney said something and then the music started, everyone exchanging looks as the number started. Sebastian gathered he was right in his presumption that something had happened, turning to glare at Kurt who returned his look, looking angry at both him and Blaine who was singing. 

The number was great, definitely  _ passionate _ , the room joining in when they needed to even if a little hesitantly. The tension was ridiculously thick, and although Blaine was absolutely killing it, the atmosphere was so palpable it hurt, and Sebastian could tell it was killing him to perform. 

He came to an end, the room starting to clap albeit a little nervously, but it wasn’t long before Blaine was holding back a sob and running out the room, hand over his mouth. 

Silence fell and a few faces looked at him, most people staring nervously at Kurt and whispering to each other, the lack of noise painful as no one knew what to do. Sebastian made eye contact with Santana, who gestured with her head to the door aggressively, making a ‘shoo’ action with her hand. 

Before he could go though, Tina was up and her and Mike left the room, sharing concerned glances between the two of them as they exited, leaving Sebastian deflated in his seat. It was probably for the best, if he had gone and rushed out after Blaine all that would do was fuel more rumours, create more drama, drag him into a situation which he wasn’t really part of. Not really. 

Santana rolled her eyes at him as Mr Schue awkwardly made his way to the front to start speaking, not that anyone paid him much attention anyway as he droned on. The class ended fairly quickly, everyone clambering to leave with heads pushed together and whispers filling the room, Kurt notably running out very fast. 

He was joined on his way to the cafeteria by Santana, who gave him a particularly confusing look as if she knew something he didn’t, falling into step alongside him. 

“So, what was all that about then?” she asked with raised eyebrows as they made their way to lunch. 

Sebastian shrugged, staring straight ahead not wanting to be overly involved in gossip but it seemed like he already was. “Who says I know anything?” She clearly didn’t believe him. 

“Because it’s those two and it’s you and you’re obviously involved somehow, the pair of them can’t have an argument with you being in the middle of it Smythe,” Santana continued matter of factly, which was mainly so annoying because it was true. 

They arrived in the cafeteria which was thankfully absent of other glee club members, grabbing food and sitting at an empty table in the corner before he replied.

“Something to do with Kurt texting a guy, look I don’t know the details, ask Berry or someone she probably knows more than I do. They weren’t particularly forthcoming with the information” he sighed. “Don’t think it has anything to do with me though, cos it doesn’t. This one is all on them.”

Santana just hummed unconvincingly, looking up as Brittney, Quinn, and Artie came over to join their table and shuffled round to make space. 

Artie looked like he was going to say something, staring at Sebastian curiously but he raised his fork up and glared before he could. 

“Abrahms, don’t even think about it. I don’t know anything, it has nothing to do with me, shut up and eat your lunch.”

Artie raised his hands in surrender mumbling something like “I didn’t say shit” under his breath, Quinn chuckling next to him as the table started to eat and talk amongst themselves. 

Sebastian just grumbled and made sure no one else was going to say anything, staring down at his plate and not making eye contact with anyone else for the duration of lunch. He didn’t see Blaine or Kurt at all the rest of the day. 

~

That evening was again just spent goofing around with Sam, actually speaking to his parents for a bit before heading to his room. They didn’t talk much, keeping out of each other’s way, but managed not to argue for an entire conversation which was a win at least. 

Arriving at school the next day Sebastian was determined to both sing in glee club, and speak to Blaine. He felt guilty about not talking to him yet, feeling too weird to text him after not going and finding him, but also having no idea what to say. He knew he had to say something though.

Admittedly, his song choice may not have been perfect given the circumstances. But he could honestly say it wasn’t chosen with that in mind, it just happened to be one of his favourite Whitney songs, and something upbeat to perform. After yesterday, it may just add to some of the gossip, but frankly Sebastian didn’t care anymore. 

Blaine felt under appreciated, neglected, unwanted. He would just remind him that he wasn’t. 

Seeing as he had already asked to sing, Schuester let him go first, as apparently Kurt had also asked to go. Because of course he had. Glee club was nothing if not a bunch of people trying to communicate through song rather than actually talking - not that that was what he was doing, no. Not at all. 

“Well, this is one of my favourite Whitney songs,” Sebastian announced to the group, clasping his hands together. “And, uh, you can interpret the rest.”

He was pretty sure Santana muttered “wanky” under her breath, but ignored her as the band started to play, taking his position. 

‘I’m Your Baby Tonight’ was undeniably a great song, and if the first line just happened to be  _ from the moment I saw you, I went outta my mind _ , well that was just a coincidence. 

Sebastian was a natural performer, playing to the crowd and dancing in the room pulling people up with him, grabbing Brittney’s hands and moving with her before moving onto Tina, dipping her down low. 

However his attention remained on Blaine, casting looks to him throughout the song, staring at his eyes as he lifted Santana, winking as he ran a hand down her waist and sang  _ you are my fantasy _ . It was borderline inappropriate, and wasn’t going unnoticed by the room, but they didn’t seem to care too much by the way everyone was singing along. They just liked a good performance. 

Sebastian made his way to the seats, grabbing Sam’s face to sing into it and sitting on his lap, the blond just cheering and grinning up at him next to a laughing Mike. He let his eyes drift over to Blaine and linger on his face, staring at him as he said the line  _ hold on and enjoy the ride _ , squeezing Sam’s arm for good measure. 

He moved away from the rest of the club by the end of the song, finishing in the middle of the room to a loud round of applause, people cheering as he took an over dramatic bow, Mr Schuester coming over to pat him on the back clearly not a clue what was going on. 

“Ok thank you Sebastian! That is how you perform everybody, wow, well done!”

There were a final few whoops before he made his way back over to his seat, accepting the fist bump from Sam with a chuckle who didn’t look phazed at all by his dance. After he was seated, Kurt awkwardly made his way up to the front, fiddling with his hands and looking very uncomfortable, glancing at Blaine who was in the top corner. 

Music started, and Sebastian felt irritation rise as he heard what song it was. Because of  _ course _ Hummel would pick something which was no semblance of an apology, instead just something that states they’re never going to change, and demanding the other person stay. Of course. 

The atmosphere shifted dramatically as Kurt’s performance continued, and yeah, it was emotional, and he was a good singer, but Sebastian wasn’t buying it. Why was he trying so hard to cling onto something which just wasn’t working? It was painful, and both of them just seemed to be hurting themselves, and he hated it. 

He managed to block out most of the song, not even clapping when it finished as he had noticed Kurt hadn’t clapped to his either. Pettiness was a choice, and one he made daily. 

Schuester again applauded, speaking to them about Nationals and their upcoming dance training, but Sebastian just didn’t care, his head was too clouded to think. Briefly, he allowed himself to look back at Blaine, to see what his face would be like. 

The shorter boy had watery eyes, clearly emotional, but was still staring straight ahead and not looking at Kurt, although his expression was too guarded to exactly decipher. As soon as the bell rang he was off before anyone could speak to him, and Sebastian stopped himself from following. 

~

Later in the day he got a message in the guys group chat from Puck, saying to meet in the locker room for their weekly gym session early as he had something to give them. Knowing Puckerman, it was either chlamydia or something stolen, but Sebastian was nothing if not curious so went anyway. 

The shot glasses he handed out were all but certainly stolen, but the sentiment behind them as he said he was gonna miss all of them, and cherished the moments they had together. Sebastian was glad to be included, but honestly, didn’t think he was going to particularly even notice Puck was gone. He tried to block him out most the time. 

Their workout went ahead as usual, something he tended to enjoy even if weights weren’t his thing, as he generally preferred cardio, but they usually had good chats and was a time to catch up with the lads if nothing else. 

Blaine was notably quiet however, using the punching bag in the corner with a lot more aggression than usual, but Sebastian waited until the end of the session before approaching. He figured Blaine needed some time alone with the bag first. 

As the rest of the guys were finishing up and heading towards the showers, Sebastian swallowed his pride and went over, towel slung around his neck. 

“Please don’t tell me that’s my face on there,” he joked, the sounds of fists against plastic stopping as he approached. 

Blaine looked up and sighed, a tired smile on his face that was barely a remnant of what it used to be. “No, no it’s not. Probably should be after your little stunt, but I know you, and I know you were just trying to cheer me up, so, you’re forgiven.”

At least he didn’t have to explain himself, which was good, but Sebastian couldn’t ignore how defeated Blaine’s entire demeanor was, like he couldn’t even fight anymore. “Look, B, it’s your relationship, not my business, but I just…” he trailed off and exhaled, staring up at the ceiling as he tried to find the words. “I can’t just  _ stand _ here and watch you tear yourself apart, be so unhappy that it hurts you, just because you feel you have to. You don’t owe him anything.”

Blaine shook his head and started to untape his hands, brow furrowed. “I… I owe him some things Seb, I didn’t realise how hard things had been for him, I mean he’s getting ready to go to college and -”

“-And you’ve been there for him, supported him, you don’t need to lie to yourself B and say that you need to stay together because that’s what you’re supposed to do. Don’t torture youself,” he pleaded, not a tone that would usually ever come out of his mouth. 

Finn rounded the corner and narrowed his eyes at them, gaze flickering back and forth before asking Sebastian something about soccer, dragging him out of it. He replied, stepping away from Blaine in the process and mentally shaking himself out. 

He didn’t need to do anything more, wasn’t his place to beg, which was just pathetic anyway. There was nothing more he could even say at this point, when everything had been said, so he just gave a final look to Blaine and headed off to the showers to clean off, get ready for the rest of the day. 

~

As Sebastian got into bed that night, later than he should’ve done thanks to Sam  _ insisting _ they kept playing ‘one more round’, which turned into ten, his phone buzzed next to him. It was 2am, the only messages he got at this time were booty calls or strange ‘would you rather’ questions’ from Mike, but it was a different name on his screen that time. 

**Blaine Anderson**

we broke up. 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!!!! no clue when the next chapter is gonna be up i do be swamped in work right now, but thanks so much for ur support!! im killer-leo on tumblr if u wanna say hi <3

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading!!!! im at killer-leo on tumblr if u wanna say hi or whatevs xxx


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